The Day Lunch Came To Town

Bedtime - It’s the most famous time to go to sleep Yet some mischievous individuals choose to run away

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍 • 𝟣𝗆 I’m doing a thankless job rn

My name is Kris S. Averted

Join me for another Sunday of being outlandish ………

Brb building Rome. Should be done tomorrow

Q: What is it called when you get bullied by your hash browns? A: A tater taunt

It’s funny to me that I can ask Claude if rooftop swimming pools get struck by lightning, and someone out there pays $1 for me to do that haha

Flawless like Wallace On it like Gromit

It’s crazy how I’m the only person who’s actually alive and all these other people are on autopilot

Me: Hello Panera Lemonade: Hello Me: I’m scared of you PL: Don’t be scared Me: Do you see how it’s scary that you just said that?

Click here to join Coalition Of Shordy’s 🔘

Jigsaw: Would you like to play a game? Me: Yes I want to play Tetris but the blocks have 5 parts instead of 4 Jigsaw: Pentix? Me: Yes

“Is this thing on??” - Me living in a society where I use many electronic switches and devices

I made cal wake up to take this picture and then I felt bad! I’m sorry!

I am practicing the NMF NMSOC method Not My Focus Not My Sphere Of Concern

Today we are celebrating the life of this man who exploded. Take a moment to reflect on his contributions during your day. Thank you to this man

Just letting you know

They’re peer pressuring you to hang from the ceiling… what do you do

So we live in a timeline where Epstein was caused to pass away. What if there was a separate freak timeline where he was still alive during all this. Both weird!

IF you know something you should place that information here 👇

Do you want me to review this new flavor of zevia be honest

In the universe, a new amazing fact is generated every 10 seconds. Yet we learn only 1 amazing fact per day. Makes you think

I literally saw people lurking outside in a dark corner. You guys! That’s so boilerplate do better

Did you know? 5 guys was invented by only one person, and the “guys” were his original 5 recipes which were groundbreaking and special

Don’t throw away the pennies!! They’re everyone’s thoughts!!

Walking slowly through the starbies drive thru and staring in the window while drinking a Dunkin’s

I didn’t want to be the person who said this. There were other gifts I would rather have received from Jesus.

Flawless like Wallace On it like Gromit

He’s up to some new bs yet again Eye roll

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍 • 𝟣𝗆 I’m doing a thankless job rn

Don’t acknowledge winter in February! Pretend to be at the equator and do tiki drinks who even cares!

Survival fantasy: We’ll live in the mountains with guns Survival reality: We’ll live through the famine by being a big ass fatso while thin people perish

Monster is in a can not a bottle. No apology can repair the harm I’ve caused

Human: It’s safe for me to drink from this bottle that is clearly labeled as being for monsters…

One corndog makes you larger And one corndog makes you small ♠️♦️♣️♥️🐇🍄🐛

At the current time of day (daytime) we can’t understand these words. It’s not even English language

You want to read my bio? Learn what my life is about? Buddy I don’t even know that type of stuff

“I will never get tired and go to sleep” - My nighttime quote

Hi just letting you know I’m on Pa - treon ! Now you know- My name there is NaomiElizabeth 🖼️🎟️🕊️

I’m just catching up, I didn’t know he said this

He dropped his rose performatively to see if you would pick it up what do you do

This man was crushed and destroyed and no one helped him

Is this a real idea that I should steal from myself…

What if there were Dango Three Brothers After that

Alt text: A cartoon of a little unexploded firework man Alt text: A vintage train shaped like a toblerone bar

<Showing up here when everyone feels horrible> Cow tools anyone? Guys how about some of the cow tools?

Doing Alot of My Business