Son what are you doing with these poggers under your bed

Siri mute dog tits

moon's big

asking a highly specialized beetle 'is this niche taken?' and not waiting for the answer

ㅤ ┌ ┐ ㅤ LISTEN DON'T LISTEN ㅤ ╳ ㅤ DON'T TALK TALK ㅤ └ ┘ ㅤ

There is no poetry in your soul, homeboy

dying of peanut butter lung

injectable peanut butter

before and after my surgical head graft miracle surgery

thinking about the time that jims surgically grafted my head onto my arm

my brain is made out if poop

cathedrals everywhere

is canada just respectability texas?

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king midas was the world’s first golden gooner #history

you've ready accepted your current living conditions would you like to continue to accept them?

@byuopp.bsky.social do you think that we knew eachither ina past life

m’laundry

please don’t mention my third eye

tiptoeing around with my friend Crepuscular Jeffrey we are on the hunt for some freshest bat cheese

most animals probably have a slur for humans

i’m asking the horses if they’ll help

this is where the magic happens

why won’t you look at me when we make love

why won’t you look at me when we make love

let’s find out what’s under your floorboards 🫵👇

hey do you know where i can get a banana ?

yeah everones bitin my shit you know how that goes

🤘 You Shook Me All Milk Long 🤘

Like this tweet if Crab Man should post a real selfie

@tubi im going to rob a bank

there should be more giant bee hives everywhere

getting a new doorbell that does the skyrim battle music when you press it

i know i’m a woman because of how much men love to explain things to me

i was strangled by a juggalo at the Chicago World's Fair in 1893

one of these days i'm going to teach you all a lesson through the powers of dance and campfire

bro i miss your singular wit and arcane musings

live action Superjail! 2026

anthropomorphizing many of yall

if something is encrusted that could be wonderful or terrible. it really depends.

putting my dad on notice

insulin should be free

Over many years of disciplined study I have gained the ability to worry about anything

the four words every woman wants to hear

Charlemagne was all about that vigorous pumping & no foreplay. He certainly wasn’t a kind nerd who gave calf cramping orgasms

sponge bob has soaked up some things he dont like to talk about