Drove seven hours for a 2 hour interview today. I’m so done with it.

i just found out that butt is short for buttocks. did y’all know about this?

he was auctioning off memorabilia in order to try and afford treatment and now he's gone. fuck cancer for sure, but double fuck our broken healthcare system. you deserved better, james. i am so sorry.

If I ever ask for this call the police

More like Nerd of The Seven kingdoms amiright

Post a banger that isn’t in English youtu.be/ozXIAg7zp9I?...

so i talked to one of the bushes at the super bowl www.nbcnews.com/pop-culture/...

Pulling for the ski jumping team but it’s hard to root for a kid named Tate

When someone tells me how old their child is I say "that's such a fun age" even if it's 37

Everyone was so concerned about the long dong ski jumpers that no one noticed the skaters growing extra legs. 4D chess.

Open the schools

not nearly as many chances to earn a free personal pan pizza as an adult 0/10 do not recommend

I can't explain it but the Seahawks are the anti-facist team.

Tired: left shark Wired:

can’t believe the “patriots” have a quarterback who’s “scared to pull the trigger”. so unamerican. do better.

idk man, patriots probably shouldn't have made a little boy their quarterback

Fucking Ferris doesn’t need AI money.

omg he taught both teams

That Hellmann’s ad so bad I kind of wanna fight somebody

Excellent Puerto Rico power grid callback.

Google servers overloaded from angry queries like “Puerto Rico part of America true”

Time for white dudes with weird little chodes to change the channel

It’s important to know who’s the David Bowie and who’s the Freddie Mercury in your relationship.

these AI commercials at the super bowl feels like those crypto commercials a few years ago. whatever happened to FTX ? must be good things after a super bowl commercial!

Sort of bummed the fan bases won’t give us images of midwesterners with slightly outdated hairstyles this year

Looking back and feeling the way my body does now.. if I were a different person, could have been pretty good cross country skier. Shit looks meditative.

Superbowl LX sounds like it was named by GM or something. Does it have heated seats?

a.i. dorks are like, "“If I can generate four tons of mechanically separated meat in a day, and you need 4 hours to cook two servings of Coq Au Vin with rosemary and thyme, who’s going to win the race?”

Athletes at the top of their game. Peak performance. Edge of your seat plays. Strategic brilliance. Fuck yes the curling is on.

That Swedish guy needs gay friends to tell him about his hair

Well dang, if 500 hillbillies aren’t going to tune in, the ratings are absolutely cooked.

i cannot think of anything funnier than "going to lower broad to watch the Super Bowl"

Same, brother.

She made boobies for breakfast

SHE’S FINISHED! My 5-foot-long Enterprise D oil painting is complete after nearly 100 hours of work! I remember being 13 years old or so and trying to draw her and it was so hard, and all I wanted was to be able to do something like this. Truly a dream come true. 🥰🖖

well that’s very specific

Not a single element of this dude is the correct size or angle

"shitting one's brains out" doesnt make sense as an expression. thats nto where your brain is

"Protest influencer" With 1.2k followers. You're doing great bud.

Third year in a row where after I think I’m having a medical event and it turns out I just threw a baseball yesterday

I love takes like this because it implies a unified conspiracy but anyone who has spent (5) minutes in complex projects directed by people with no direct subject matter experience knows the truth: These people are fucking dum

they're called hummingbirds because they don't know the words

foot by the fruit

what if it happens today?

Been shot at, stabbed, idk. Best one is a fire broke containment shooting embers 1/2 km below us on the hill and came racing up. We had to throw our gear over a ridge and jump 6 meters down to a small rock scree and wait for it to burn past us. Bigass burning yucca kept rolling by.

man if i got beaten up by a bunch of random emo teens in Buda, Texas I think I'd never leave my house again

who up feeling inadequate about a fictional school

Eternal glory to the reporter who blurts out "Jeffrey Epstein's best friend says what?" and gets Trump to say "what?!?" in a very confused way

Man, fuck that hairy little bucktooth Phil guy.