I would be so stoked to get the country back from the evangelicals, tbh.

Let's all move to New Zealand (wait are they better or worse than us)

welcome to heaven. please continue as before. unless what you were doing is bad. cut that out.

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Seems like enough to base a nation's health policy on.

Me repenting just in case

how is babby formed how girl get pragnent

Did you and your family sit down and eat dinner together at the table? I’ve never seen that in real life..

One more day in the 90s, and then, dare I hope?🍂

*BC Powder*

The whole administration in one quote

I know other stuff is happening right now, but just FYI these are the best Cheetos

When they say ai is a time saver what that often means is that it’s a tool that makes it easier for you to waste someone else’s time.

Leading national political reporters vowed that never again would they look the other way when a president was showing every sign of being too debilitated to do the job

Is it a good thing for an industry when people are constantly inventing new words to describe the terrible side effects of your product?

I'm just gonna keep this one handy in the drawer for the day he dies.

I’ve been saying for years that it should be illegal to email me

trump pulling a hardboiled egg out of charlie kirks corpse on stage and shows it to the audience as they scream. he is asking them if he should take a bite of it and they are cheering

my favorite subgenre of Halloween decoration is “skeleton of things that absolutely do not have skeletons”

I'm gonna randomly leave complete outfits laying around in parking lots, the streets and stores on Tuesday.

I see everyone's awake from either a thunderstorm or earthquake, maybe the rapture really is nigh

The real thunderstorm outside was louder than the fake one on my sleep app, and now I'm awake 2 hours early

Imagining my package's adventure around Frisco this evening to the tune of Yakity Sax

FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK, BITCH

Get in losers, we’re grieving

Moses coming down from the mountain:

A TIME OF WHATEVER

wrote about the Kimmel situation and the “public interest” mattdpearce.substack.com/p/the-pointl...

Probably shouldn't have spent the day trying to finish off the margarita mix before summer is officially over, but here we are

Well this is embarrassing #Cowboys

I see I'm not even going to be able to have football as an escape this fall

No need to pretend that this is about immigration anymore.

In the last 6 qaurters plus OT, the Cowboys have allowed 689 passing yards to... RUSSELL WILSON AND CALEB FCKN WILLIAMS

The right's reaction to this death is one of the most blood-curdling events I've witnessed in my lifetime.

Is this a bit because it feels like a bit

I always get these two ladies mixed up, sorry ladies

a beautiful soul, an absolute saint.

I have also reviewed over 30 statements and posts

Hell yeah, I hope the rapture happens on Tuesday. Take all these monsters up to meet Jerry Falwell and James Dobson in the sky so the rest of us can go get our vaccines and abortions in peace

“Calling us Nazis is illegal” really does seem to misunderstand some fundamental things about the Nazis

All this stuff is just out here

it should rain at night. sunny during the day. just a proposal

how to fire every cop lmao

Trump criticizes Pam Bondi for not charging his adversaries quickly enough, in a Truth Social post that looks a lot like a DM. truthsocial.com/@realDonaldT...

A real who’s who of nopes

y’all the queen of england’s funeral didn’t go on for this long

had to read the article to understand wtf was going on here which is that Meta is literally feeding Instagram pictures parents took of their teenage daughters to middle aged men as ads for Threads

I feel like we’re owed a minute-by-minute replay of everything that led to pulling that tribute to air celebrity family feud instead. Panicked editors cutting around racist sound bites, Frankensteining a coherent ideology that doesn’t reveal too much. I need to know about those final screenings!

There actually were no "roadblocks" in the *investigation*, which rather readily revealed no wrongdoing on the part of the accused. The system worked perfectly. The roadblock came in the form of a mad king.

this thread is a nice reminder that hanania is an extremely poor thinker who benefits from the fact that many commentators are innumerate and can be easily misled with simple data manipulation