Once you see it you’ll never not see it again

Announcers when the skier is .1 seconds ahead of the leader: "Incredible. We have never seen anything remotely like what she is doing right now." Announcers when the skier is .1 seconds behind the leader: "Humiliating. Her family is going into hiding to avoid any connection to this debacle."

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can you imagine how fucking annoying it would be to be the like. 12th best person in the world at ski jumping. like you can’t STOP going to the competitions right? but you’re going to get 12th. your mom flew there

Hey, it makes a lot of sense that you would be worried about icebergs on this vessel's maiden voyage — I get it. I just double-checked the charts and this route is definitely iceberg free. But even if it wasn't, remember that the Titanic isn't just a boat; it's a modern, unsinkable cruise ship.

Roses are red Vice is inherent

This is blackout poetry to me

To anyone that needs clarification, "your best" is what you can accomplish without damage to your physical, mental and emotional health, not what you can accomplish by destroying them

every shirt either says “I don’t see what’s funny about that” or has an image of a popular meme from 2013

This is so spot on

This Weeks Onion Magazine: ‘I Don’t Know How And It’s Not My Event’: Simone Biles On Her Decision Not To Snowboard At The Winter Olympics

Definitely put the Nazi who hasn’t even won the nomination yet in a state with a population the size of the Bronx in front of the guy who is currently governing eight and a half million people

hold on i gotta take this

Be the Hot Rod Herman Remix you wish to see in the world

Is she saying that the Dow would be even higher if more children had been trafficked?

the thing about AOC 2028 that reminds me of Trump 2016 is that it seems obvious *somebody* will take her down but as soon as you get to individual names you have your doubts anyone actually can

A dresser inside a museum in New York City has been discovered as a secret stop on the Underground Railroad — the first of its kind discovered in Manhattan in over 100 years

No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor

Everybody knows that Pupper just won Downhill Gold

I will not support any funding deal that puts money in the hands of Stephen Miller, Kristi Noem, and this violent agency. Defund and abolish ICE now.

This is a clever riddle because they want you to think you have to do all the math on how many children and nannies there were but the answer is just “two pedophiles were going to St. Ives”

You gotta take the good news where you can get it

People on Reddit are getting Amazon to refund their Ring products because of their partnership with Flock and that creepy Super Bowl ad www.reddit.com/r/FlockSurve...

Downward-Punching Dog

lmao “suspected political message,” they don’t even know if there was one but they’re mad anyway. try google translate you losers

My theory that AI maximalists don’t know how to use a computer remains undefeated so far

at the end of the six months, only one of you will have written a book

is 50 first dates a rougelike

ok. does anyone know if it's twice per athlon or every two athlons

Couldn’t find mine either. Real Monty Python’s Cheese Shop energy here.

Daniel Craig.

And the world’s gonna know your name WHAT’S YOUR NAME, MAN

Over the past two weeks I've begun to realize that rich people only started funding chatbots once they could no longer email Jeffrey Epstein

Okay for realsies, can anyone top Jonathan Banks in the “all his roles are part of the same canon” department?

Maybe now they’ll finally stop the “nobody wants to work anymore” crap

it's unbelievable to me that someone could actually be a trillionaire. i think most of us have trouble internalizing how much money that truly is. let me put it in simple terms for you: a trillion dollars is three million dollars

Literally

When your anti-leftist campaign fails hard 👀

oh that’s why she lost

MacKenzie Scott has the chance to do the funniest thing right now.

worth noting that the second rich people stopped being afraid of mobs tearing them limb from limb, they stopped building libraries and opera houses and stuff and started ripping the copper wiring out of the walls of society instead

what in the entire FUCK, Lizzo?

🎵 In a pig country Pigs stay with you They don’t get a hotel That’s just what pigs do

If they didn’t say pew pew pew, an acquittal you must pursue

Dem leadership: changing this is a difficult process, you fool. You rube. You utter infant. Give us between $5 and $50 Mamdani, wiping grease off his hands: So it turns out there's a switch on this machine that puts it into either orphan-shredding mode or free school lunch mode. Just had to flip it

Early 2000s TV was largely about this lady being a guest star who was somehow in danger

All the stars are here: Brantley Gilbert, Brice Bradley, Gabby Babby, Bibb Glibsy, Slab Gabbert, Brice Bryce,

Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night