I think what makes the 'Caines dastardly tricks / illusions' bit so funny to me is that it sounds like a product summary of the series written by someone that's only watched like 1 clip of it and doesn't get it at all

There is no joy in Mudville. The mighty Casey has announced a sponsorship with DraftKings and also he will be transferring to a new founder-created league called BallSmashers that is headquartered in a suburb of Riyadh. Get a discount with the code ATDABAT20

“When Neil Armstrong first set foot on the moon, he and all the space scientists were puzzled by an unidentifiable white object. I knew immediately what it was. That was a home run ball hit off me in 1937 by Jimmie Foxx.” – Lefty Gomez

(young dewey) man i hope one day i can have my own decimal system

the wikipedia page for the mario galaxy says it's made $48 at the box office right now for some reason and it's so funny

these days the real april fool is none other than donald trump

You do not get credit for all the times you drive sober.

just dug through my email so fast to unearth this. an ex’s coworker’s pregnancy announcement. the baby shower was bacon themed as well

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller March 31,1952

Satellite Pollution xkcd.com/3225/

The back of the box is WILD

Hello! My name is Antigone, I'm a trans lesbian, and my car exploded a couple weeks ago. It cost me more than I thought it would have, so if you can afford it, Frenchie and I would really appreciate the help. Thank you! (PayPal and Venmo are @antigoneprogone, just like here)

All next week on the @gooffkings.bsky.social

Most of Tenna's "funny text" is stylistically similar between both English and Japanese versions of the game, however the "Susiezilla" text is styled entirely differently in Japanese. With the Japanese version closely resembling the Japanese logo of the original 1954 Godzilla.

ME: sorry folks - one sec, having gamera issues CHAT: lol gamera. gamera issues. mfer said gamera [I enable a secondary camera feed showing the infamous kaiju Gamera attacking me] CHAT: oh fuck

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller March 31,1948

lately the chumbucket ads I've been seeing on local news pages keep featuring (ai generated?) stock images of old dudes in marine uniforms, usually screaming

NorthernLion is always saying some shit like, "Waaait, Winnie the Pooh was onto something, man, a smackerel of honey goes crazyyyyyy"

the ghost in a cartridge that's forever stuck unplayed in a 9.8 graded sealed copy sitting on the shelf of some youtuber in los angeles

Sometimes, the system works.

It's been a minute, but here's a cryptic crossword clue for today: Three halogens start foreseeing a sharp drop (5)

Gosford Park (2001) Gosford World (2015) Gosford World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)

learning amazing things about chinese emoji culture

FUCK IT. I CANT LET THIS GO ON ANY LONGER. IF THE OSCARS CAN TIE, SO CAN THE FAR MORE PRESTIGIOUS PGOT NAYSH NAME OF THE SEASON. WHEN THESE TWO WIN WE ALL WIN!!!! SEE YOU IN THE SUMMER SPACE (FIRSTNAME) COWBOYS (LASTNAME)

Hey, you. ;) Rumour has it, there's a crazy new toilet experience arriving at the festival, right about...now. Head to the official Red Bull Shitting Paddock at the main festival outpost, and see what all the hype is about.

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller March 28,1953

it would be crazy if it happens while you're on a plane because some of the passengers would start crying and like have no where to go for hours while everyone else is really happy and laughing and going nuts

attempt. WAV channel, manual, drum pitch, transpose on, one frame of notched sine, then smooth sine. slightly micromanaged four octave slide down. doubled an octave up on the pulse channel with 50% pulse width w/ a touch of detuning.

Baseball is the only argument that nominative determinism is real. These are baseball as fuck names

The correlation between being a Jan 6er and being a pedophile is incredible, it must be like several standard deviations outside what you’d expect just based on chance

Just hired the Three Stooges to move my priceless antique vase collection. Suffice it to say, it did not go well. I ended up screaming "You're so fucking fired! Fuck you!!!!!!!!!"

Arrival

The gang goes to New York #TADC #digitalcircus

LRT the times I listen to podcasts the most are when I'm driving, at the store, walking around, or playing a video game, all of which are activities notably NOT conducive to watching a video. Piss Me Of

I think we gave filming podcasts a fair enough shake and can stop now!

due to the television i’m very worried about most of the residents of pittsburgh a lot of the time now. i’m just really stressed out about what’s going down over there

LEAST flattering manul photo I have ever seen in my ENTIRE LIFE: Pabu, who voluntarily climbed into his carrier for the first time in his life, age 9. Once he was safely drugged, he was examined by the vet for a clean bill of health! [via Lake Superior Zoo]

Castor Semenya: "I have carried this weight. So have other women of colour who deserved better from sport. Reintroducing genetic screening is not progress — it is walking backwards. Women’s sport does not need this. It needs to be abuse-free... This is just exclusion with a new name."

the LotR memes will continue until morale improves ⚔️

I LOVE THE INTERNET! I LOVE THE INTERNET! I LOVE THE INTERNET! I LOVE THE INTERNET!

Imagining Homer Simpson with grills

It’s big ball chunky time