Me if i was Bad Bunny at the end of his half time show: Dave & Busters! Six Flags! East Side Marios! A&W! Gamestop! Aritizia! Value Village! Chili’s! Tim Hortons! Osmows! Cineplex!

Would you rather drink a sprite or go to bed

Everyone’s so excited for spring

After using my ipad my phone feels so small

streamed kcd1 and died in prison in the tutorial

TONIGHT: @slowpuke.bsky.social joins the gang for yet another exploration into some of the strangest music Instagram Reels has to offer. 16 songs will enter, but only one can be judged The Ode To (Or Against) Love. Join us at twitch.tv/traditional_... at 4pm ET / 9pm GMT and see who it will be.

Two zoomers in the seats across the aisle each of them has 5 sandwiches in a ziploc bag. I take my airpod out for one second and i hear one of em go “Ice cream, bruh” while looking at his phone and now im looking away

Got to my seat on the train and i had to squeeze in front of the person in the aisle seat, said to em “Hey i’m in 7C… i’d be a very happy pirate!” And would u believe i got 0 reaction not even an exhale. Piicture of small ant with bindle

Me looking at my 6 am train leaving the station knowing damn well i could have made it if i didnt stay up till 3am getting the hansry cutscene in kingdom come deliverance 2

Biggest condolences to Jack Johnson who i’ve just noticed has comments turned off on instagram, presumably because many people have just clued in that he visually resembles Jeffrey Epstein to a shocking extent

Having to take a shit ten minutes to my therapy session call that trauma dumping

Geese’s Cameron Winter? more like Geese Dodging Winter by flying south

Baristas see ts and think “how can i clang this around as much as i can when it’s busy to make a point”

The dickhead Retail Giant is back on his bullshit, closing stores. He has a fist of cruelty

That one fish in the pond who really likes the taste of copper

Bruh, no one tell Elmer Fudd who was at the Super Bowl last night 😳😳😳😳

Best part about the TPUSA half time show was this man walking out on stage to teenage girls genuinely squealing for him. Looking like… well, just an alcoholic, really

Love getting a breakdown for a commercial audition that consists of “Just type on the computer in a relaxed way. Keep this relatable” girl fuck you. Yesss the way im on my computer like this too 😍 boots

My boyfriend has golden retriever energy im always putting eggs in his mouth and making him carry them around without breaking them

When a bad basketball player only makes Oscar bait movies call that Badknee Hooper

ten years ago today no one clapped

Post Malone made War Pigs sound like a racist song somehow

Pharrell Williams is honoured at the Grammys for his achievement in developing Toronto condo buildings

Lol @ Jelly Roll’s Jesus rant at the Grammys. What the fuck was that

Crushed it. Tysm to everyone who swung by

Justin is live now for the Goo Crew's Smash ICE Friendslopathon and he's already raised almost $7,000! Stefan will be live in about an hour to play Mario Party with Justin, Ricky, and Northernlion! See you there! twitch.tv/hcjustin

We’re watching Tubi slop. I never knew how many shark movies a streaming service could possibly hold… www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

Come watch some fucking 90 day fiance this season has been getting great feedback www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

Schedule for this week at slowpukelive

They call it Sapporo because when i talk to the bartender i say “SoPour me another beer”

Avril Laverne Troyer

Its tlc tuesday in the fucking town www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

Whats up. I’m live. I’m playing old dogshit games I found www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

wow im using that handy new go live feature!! im playing dynasty warriors 2

There truly is an inflatable minion for any holiday or event

Shaking my head while reading Romance of the Three Kingdoms on the train so other passengers know that I understand Cao Cao’s hubris will once again foil his plans and cost the lives of many

Stranger Things Telus store. I want 1 Dustin phone please!!!!

Just saw a guy walking out of a bubble tea place in the mall shrugging his hands, shaking his head and grumbling to himself. Empty handed, also. Bro what on earth could have gone wrong ordering bubble tea to warrant that reaction

Alan Parse and Project

Saddle up every1 its time to begin a new season of 90 Day Fiancé www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

Im streaming tn. Its a gaming stream but Black & White has been pissing me off. I’ll probs play roblox lmao www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive

New short horror story. 5 words… “Getting pap smear, Borrowers emerge”

Fuck. Just had another really bad thought. Working as a soda jerk and the dolly you had your eye on is gettin’ chirped by a gang of beatniks. And all you can do is scoop that mud or else the old man would sock you a one-two for meddling…

Who said a white girl with eczema can’t be a friggin cinephile?? Yup. David Binch…

Imagining being a soda jerk and a greaser walks in i’d kms bro

It’s my first time doing a NYE stream i think lol www.twitch.tv/slowpukelive