All love to Eugene Mirman!

while I think folks generally understand how Trump's birthright citizenship order threatens a ton of newborns now, I don't think it's fully appreciated how it also threatens everyone bc if he can arbitrarily revoke citizenship from them, why not from you? ballsandstrikes.org/scotus/birth...

🤗

Thinking you’re apolitical is like thinking you “don’t have an accent”—it just means you haven’t thought about it very much.

All I'm saying is that if an artist I liked, even a most beloved artist from my childhood, started saying "every book, album, poster, t-shirt, or ticket you buy lets us throw another person into the giant, horrifying people grinder!" I would find it very easy to stop buying that artist's stuff.

We’re the thunder boys we’re gonna ace that motherfucking life insurance physical.

Art opportunity

you know how i know im a 44yo dad? how much i laughed at this shit

Here we are again

Gang. GANG. Here's that Ghanian bootleg Cheers artwork you were looking for.

Markets Surge After Trump Claims He Had Sex With An Angel https://theonion.com/markets-surge-after-trump-claims-he-had-sex-with-an-angel/

“I am political,” Ms. Rachel told me of her new effort to free kids from ICE detention. “It’s political to believe that children are worthy of love … and that our care shouldn’t stop at what we look like, our family, at our religion, at a border. Mr. Rogers was very political.”

Aesop: I TOLD YOU

I heard there was a secret cord You plug it in and you meet the Lord But you never care for OSHA do ya

are you in the mood for snake?

afroman's case deserved the publicity it got and he did handle it with absolutely legendary petty bard energy. he is, however, still a Single-Issue Libertarian dumbass. imo these things are not mutually exclusive and the circle of discourse can be closed now that the case is over.

I would also ask for anonymity to say something like this.

cannot imagine having to make this statement at 96

I’m a voting maximalist. I think prisoners should be able to vote. Babies should be able to vote. Even people who voted for Trump 3 times should be able to vote.

And speaking of “Money For Nothing” it seems like President Donald Trump is in some “Dire Straits”

Sad to see the Ides of March becoming commercialised like this. I really feel like we're losing track of the true spirit of the holiday. It's not about how many knives you can stick in a tyrant all at once, it's about the whole community coming together to stab the tyrant as many times as possible.

Haitian immigrant last seen in ICE custody—found dead on the street 3 days later. Agents drove her 1 hour away from home for processing—then released without notifying her family. Her body was found near a bus stop.

Looks like there’s still enough time for me to pop into a tannery and pass on a ‘BEWARE THE HIDES OF MARCH!’ admonishment.

Hate watch of the day. This ignorant little shit omg.

This should be everyone’s favorite song.

The Singularity is upon us: Apple's AI summarized a text message that read "I'm still down to clown if you are" to.... "clown event still possible."

set your clocks back again, we fucked up

any social interaction

Happy Gary Retrograde everyone! The next two weeks are the only two weeks out of the year when Gary Numan is older than Gary Oldman

Seems like the Colorado House Speaker could (and should) preempt this with an impeachment threat. www.denverpost.com/2026/03/04/j...

this fucking asshole, man

If they want me back they have to go fully Woke 2, sorry. Whole hog. I gotta be able to get an abortion there

cramming for this eye exam looking at every fucking thing I can

Powerful stuff from @chrislhayes.bsky.social. The stuff is too little said in major media

So we’re either not at war because it’s only air strikes or we’ve been at war for 47 years.

Uh no...we definitely realize it.

Reading this, again, you get the sense that someone at Anthropic knows how the intel community misleads by using definitions of words that are different than everyone else believes. And the people at OpenAI simply don't know or don't care about that.

I'm thinking of all the Iranian children we killed for no reason at that school, but I'm built different

this is just ranked anuses

Statements from Colorado's six congressional Democrats today contain a lot of criticism of Trump, a lot of requests for briefings and explanations and authorization votes, and zero statements of straightforward opposition to the U.S. waging war on Iran.

So you’re telling me these receptacles are trash.

Thinking about this quote from Persepolis creator Marjane Satrapi again.