this was always the quote from The Iraq War runup that stuck with me the most, total lack of logic or strategy, completely evaporating international goodwill and billions of dollars so a few dozen horrible guys in well-furnished offices can briefly feel the saucy little thrill of committing murder

at some point my college gf wasn't sure if she'd heard "Where Is My Mind," so i sang it to see if it sounded familiar to her, and at "I was swimmin in the Caribbean / animals were hiding behind the rock / except the little fish," she was like "YOU ARE MAKING THIS UP RIGHT NOW"

my sick 8-year-old just shuffled over, blanket over her head and shoulders like a little urchin, face all pale with dark-circled eyes, and in a tiny voice, asked "papa?" I said "hey baby girl, what do you need?" and she asked "can you download Kesha's 'Tik Tok' for the ipod?"

dudes bleeding out on the battlefield keep being like "cold.. I'm so cold..." it's like okay?? maybe dress for the frickin weather???

Punish The Corrupt Tour 2026

Nine Delights 2026

did my annual new years day polar plunge in the river and had to walk beyond the waterfall to find a bit where the water wasn't completely frozen solid. got back inside, and my 5-year-old was like "aww.. i want to go in the river too" and i was like "NO YOU DON'T"

i think AI will soon prompt a resurgence in appreciation for Moshfegh's "Eileen", as readers seek to remind themselves that there is value in paying careful, obsessive attention to the sensations of being a human soul grown of a human body, and the ways being incarnated is unhinged as fuck

more death guard stuff, TZEENTCH BOYS DNI

not that hard to make your kid smile actually

I just had to draw this one! (done tonight for Dune drawing jam at Hugo House)

mike f on how one of his accounts got nuked rip homniegh see u on the other side

secret menu alert! throw a dust bunny into your cup to try Gatorade With Pulp

dropped a container of broth and instinctively made a plaintive noise that sounded like James Cagney taking Poison Damage

mike fossey had a million good tweets but this is probably the one i think about the most, doing woodworking post-2010ish

One of the best to ever do it

a 26-foot tall sessile alien that exists not as a character but as part of the set, just to create the right atmosphere. i think about that glorious example of human art, and then i think about hollywood greenscreen flatlit fix-it-in-post modern moviemaking, and i kinda deflate

roommate and I were on the Subway and Philip Seymour Hoffman got on. We gave him that inquisitive-spaniel head tilt as if to say "are you Philip Seymour Hoffman?" and he gave a curt nod as if to say "yes now please don't be fucking weird about it" and we nodded back and that was that

doctors dont want YOU to KNOW these are the ONLY two foods your body NEEDS

i washed the duvet cover, which led to my 7-year-old asking about the word duvet, and eventually to me explaining to her 1066 and the Norman Invasion

i think a good resolution would be reading a book a day for all of 2025. so if i start now, i'd only have to read a little over a hundred books a day to catch up. it's after noon though, today might be a wash, so like 183 books tomorrow and then 182 books the day after

this was the chart i made when i was trying to explain to a friend how my four kids' miens fit into a mendel style punnett square, with each of my kids matching each of the four colored squares

someone posted an AI pic to the dioramas subreddit, and it turns out a community of detail-oriented handcrafters is the last place you want to advertise your art fraud

probably the biggest downside to my ethnic background is when the kids are sick and I'm trying to determine if their dark undereye circles are due to illness/exhaustion or if it's just standard Greek. the upside is we are all devastatingly beautiful

thinking of pirating Star Trek for the security of digital ownership? think again

just learned I'm not alone in receiving a Warhammer Quest: Darkwater box that was missing a Cankerborn head. i used three Plaguebearer heads in its place, but I'm posting this in case anyone else is trying to figure out if it's a Known Issue #psa #warhammer #littlegrossguys

we got this glass years ago in some white elephant or something, and it fascinates me how devoid of cleverness it is. not a pun, not a rhyme, just.. a comparison of two things. "I'd rather have ice cream, instead of hookworm"

Family Sickness update: teo of the children are huddled under blankets on the couch, drifting in and out of sleep. the other two are using their new Christmas Megaphone to stomp through the house while singing Knower's "I'm The President"

i found a 4pack of Sideshow-Bob-style slide whistles at the thift store, so i gave one to each of my kids as stocking stuffers, and they're breaking new ground in using them to Annoy. my seven-year-old is holding it loosely in her mouth so that it makes a quiet breathy whistle every time she exhales

Shout out to my road dogg Pot Bear

A kid I went to high school with got the nickname “Chops Bustable” cause someone thought it was really easy to bust his chops

beer AND anchovies???? who filled my stocking? what handsome man filled my own stocking??? what beautiful man with perfect taste filled my stocking so expertly

WANTED TO STAY UP AND SEE SANTA! WANTED TO SEE AND I SAW! JOLLIER THAN YOU THINK, DAD! JOLLIER THAN YOU THINK!

all the kids are extremely sick and we're having to cancel xmas plans. the 4-year-old has tearfully informed me that he believes the purple bag of doritos will heal him

using the Milk And Cookies schtick to teach my kids about carb-loading

volunteered to usher/read at the church xmas eve service because i thought it might be nice to help out, and come this evening on the drive there i was basically spitting curses at myself like IT WASN'T ENOUGH TO GO TO CHURCH ON SUNDAY NOOO I GOTTA GO ON WEDNESDAY NOW

“Separate the art from the artist, yknow?” -Mike on the River Bottom Nightmare Band

The weasels in Roger Rabbit float up to heaven when they die because even the evil toons are unafflicted with human original sin

Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night

this is probably how gun guys feel when they line up all their lil semiautos for cleaning

my kids were asking me about The Beatles while i was driving and asked for some examples of songs, and i was like "they wrote one called Octopus's Garden, about being friends with an octopus, and hanging out in his garden, under the sea" and there was a long pause and then my 7-year-old asked "why"

nothing like the end of the year movie posts to make me realize how few movies i've been watching. i guess my worst movie of the year was the new Superman before i wearily turned it off halfway through, and the best was .. does a Lebanese ad for Café Super Brasil count as a "movie"

i fucking hate it when jinglehorse does not pick up his feet

back home in Omelas for christmas and my mom is going on and on about how josh parnell - remember josh, you went to high school with him? - has a job guarding the Child now. didnt you guys date? well one date is still a date

dreamed i was in a Saja Boys type demon kpop band where we each had an evil supernatural power. the only ones i remember were mine (flight/parkour) and one other guy's ("is boston irish")

8-year-old, playing Super Smash Bros: "papa, this is Dracula's Castle. is Dracula's Castle supposed to be scary?" me: "uh yeah, Dracula's like.. a big scary vampire" 8-year-old: "what? i thought she was a princess!" me: ".. no" 8-year-old: "what video game is she originally from?" me: "well. a book"