the doctor bronners bottle is honestly not that informative

buckdancer’s choice 2

chat is this real

Your tasteful décolletage won’t do you much good now, Bond!

lil guys

hey, champ

celebrate julia!

julia just said that im dressed like “santa claus’s groundskeeper”

one time at a party i got so riled up julia hid the lava lamp because i kept acting like i was gonna drink it

updates from julia

just leaned over to see julia googling “fancy italian vegetables”

julia is doing dutch duolingo and just said “we drinken water and eaten rice” in a funny voice

julia said “i only had access to a panini press in college but i loved the freedom it offered me” and when pressed said “you can imagine any sandwich and make it real”

2025𓂅ꮺ﹅⊹ ﹅𓂅ଘꗃ 𓍼๑ଘ⋆2026

who wants to. sit normal

kit kat

whats for. dinner

my dad telling a story about saving money at home depot but throwing in a scene where he and the cashier high-five when he senses the story flags the way a toddler would add a dinosaur to a story about the park

dad asked what groceries i for a visit and because he had never heard of arugula he thought it was an herb and bought like 15 leaves

if you are stuck on a bus in a blizzard and have a strong taste for your own humor, highly suggest searching for your own posts for a word like “this” or “is”

(music makes me lose control vox) christmas comes this time each year

rediscovered this memory of zoom teaching

this honestly such a low bar for a hamburger

⠀⠀⠀⠔⠢⠀⡄⠢⡀⠀⠀ ⡠⢄⡰⠀⠀⣦⠁⠀⡇⡠⢄ ⢇⠀⠱⠣⡴⠥⢦⡔⡎⠀⢸ ⠈⠒⡸⠎⠀⠀⠀⠱⢕⠐⠁ let me know if. ⠀⠠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠆⠀ this works. ⠀⠀⠑⠠⠔⠒⠢⠤⠊⠀⠀

the best part of having a friend who is also a hater is being in a social situation and they are like “can you believe this shit” and you are like “oh absolutely not” and you don’t even need to know what they are talking about

momentarily forgot the word toucan when i saw this photo and whispered “baby zucchinis”

used this folding table to organize some tools yesterday and havent finished, now every time i walk by i think damn what time does the gig start

my understanding of vaporwave is— and apologies if this is off-base— is that adult drug users are making music that is like, remember when your mom brought you juice

dozens of parents on one knee in the lobby of the circus during intermission coaching their children on how to say no if the clown invites them up

staying in a house with two cats im calling Meowzer and John Hiss. can you guess who is who?

fyi delta still running the menendez brothers safety video @delta

weed vape that is also a whistle. so that you can indicate fear

british audiobook reader attemping a normal american accent that could only be described as mississippi mid-atlantic? a millions chef’s kisses

defeating an empath in battle by getting really upset

cant find the original post but wanted to put this back out there

because he has been allowed, on occasion, a lick or two of milk, billy spent the entire time i ate cereal this morning hitting this pose

damn ramza in church with da thing out

you parked in the wrong billy, kid

l'une meows, l'autre pas

doctor trying to get his adult gamer patient to eat fiber: i heard that the salad strat is goated

that’s all, folks!

twenty centuries of stony sleep

weather report? yeah thats a great name because i cant decide Whether to Report them to the. the uh (suddenly distant, as if recalling a past life) Jazz Police…

never really got “taking candy from a baby” until a toddler just walked by open-palm two-handing a fresh donut from the place i like

i personally dont find this kind of thing very funny

what is the meaning of this creature

remembering on this day a TOOL-themed stoner in my high school art class who submitted this image (recreated below) as the entirety of their final portfolio in c. 2004

you can’t be talking like that, crypto dot com

when i see an incredibly short-necked person at costco, i just think of her as one of gods creatures, and do not, for example, starting singing “where’s your neck at” to the tune of basement jaxx