CLIENT: These federal charges seem serious. What kind of sentence could I get? LAWYER: Depending on the next presidential election, you're looking at somewhere between life imprisonment and becoming a millionaire.

For all the other disgraceful things about Reform’s leadership I still find this shocking. A man hurls abuse at a politician. Rather than defending her right to speak, Farage offered to buy him a pint and Yusuf to make him a peer. The descent is accelerating. www.thetimes.com/uk/politics/...

Sees what we were supposed to have Sees what we are (maybe) getting Weeps 😭

@alexkbrewer.bsky.social May be worth a tour!

"hi, I'm a padded package with a book in it" "cool, padded with bubble wrap I expect" "oh, absolutely not" "so instead you're padded with..." "carpet scraps, cigarette ends, and asbestos, yeah" "and opening you might leave me covered in those?" "buddy, I guarantee it."

Happy one-year anniversary to the craziest sign I've ever seen in the window of a pizza shop

Quite bizarre "reporting"

You never really forget how to misquote sayings. It’s like buying a bicycle.

In fairness, and decoded from a Brit perspective, that likely meant 'Holy fucking shit, what *on earth* have you done!'

this seems like it’s just asking for problems

Definite @secondmentions.bsky.social in the FA Cup Semi-Final text commentary. Chelsea are “the managerless club.”

I didn’t know Newport Docks had armaments poised for deployment!

"Oirish Paytriots " should at the very least know where our counties are FFS 🙄🤬🤬 #TraitorsAndKnuckleheads

me: who wants to get fucked up? them: i meant questions about the job but seeing as you’ve asked, yeah, let’s fucking go

me doing cross country in year 7

Well at least we now have more idea how a former Foreign Secretary then PM managed to attain and keep the posts despite obvious red flags.

Simple as that.

Scientists have been working very hard and have finally achieved what many thought impossible: a Mail Online comments section defending a Labour MP.

Love finds you when you're ready ❤️

The receipts. A complete timeline of the shifting rhetoric. More: www.meidasplus.com/p/today-in-p...

Shame he had his thumb over half the lens. Could have been a great picture

Dramatic scenes at BBC Breakfast.

uh no thanks

Jesus, they weren’t bloody joking.

Well that was a gig! Standing for two and a half hours was a lot easier in my 20’s but was worth it last night. The Feeling’s lyrical dexterity always distracts you from just how rock inspired their music is - and how ******* loud! Ears still ringing a day later.

At my first standing only gig since uni many decades ago!

CNN put together a montage of the regime's incoherent talking points about Trump's war on Iran

How does he sleep at night?

Announcing a 2nd season of Heated Rivalry already?

Guys being Dudes

Finally The Times investigative journalists unearth the reasons behind Trump’s yearning for public adulation.

Oh, the grand old duke of york He ██████████████████ He ██████████████████ And he ██████████████████

I imagine it was extremely disturbing

The enshittification of online services continues apace

its amazing how chatgpt knows everything about subjects I know nothing about, but is wrong like 40% of the time in things im an expert on. not going to think about this any further

Plans to invade Greenland have just been cancelled after this

the use of performance enhancing drugs by olympic athletes is getting out of hand

"cash only love, saves on the paperwork"

Was really into piggyback rides for a while, kinda got carried away

pleasing

Well your phone's making a copy of the image. The image existed already. Seeking and downloading should still be a serious offence, distributing images further should be a higher level offence and of course making it in the first place is more serious still - not an 'imaging' offence.

Why can’t she use tinsel?

podcasts

Kings of Leon did predict this tbf 😬