Sunday evening

Every subject of a broadsheet 'I'm leaving the country' article should be marched onto a plane at bayonet-point and have their passport revoked as they board.

Jim Ross: Bah Gawd, that's Leo's music!

Terminator starts promisingly, being about two naked men on a quest for some trousers, but then goes off in a different direction that isn't as interesting.

We shouldn't really be surprised at the innate camp of MAGA, given their leader's preferred entrance is to a song about cruising hostels for cock.

Operation Just Curious Operation Discreet Not Out Operation I Just Came Here to Use the Facilities, Officer

paint your houses with what they’re noted for you cowards

Found another sumo tournament, on Sky channel 507! This is the best news all week!

Maybe we were too quick to judge the likes of ISIS...

Ended up blasting through all four episodes of this. Big recommend, and more sausages for Chester A. Arthur!

Not the first to make this point. But there is a tyrant in charge of another country who is accused of being heavily linked to a paedophile sex ring - and supposed ‘patriots’ in this country are passionately willing him to take down our national broadcaster. Madness.

It is very funny that this Pope is just going to get jerseys from now on. Everyone decided that's what this Pope likes and that is it. It's like if your grandmother got you a puzzle for Christmas one year and you said you liked it so your entire extended family is like "oh that's the puzzle kid"

This is what people do for money on Twitter. There's more dignity in wanking off tramps behind B&M.

Some inspiring words on cinema in the streaming era from the Pope. Yes, THAT Pope.

This is what the internet was invented for.

They've made incompetence into performance art.

Allsopp vs Rosen, is it? There's an Iran-Iraq War situation for the online age.

Making a start on Death by Lightning. Always a good sign when you have Matthew Macfadyen and Ben Miles turn up, two of my faves.

Google once again thinking I am Danny La Rue. I love the AI revolution.

Astonishingly potent line about Britain at the dawn of the 80s in Larry Grayson’s Generation Game: “It says here you took a Cordon Bleu cookery course but it was a waste of time as your husband only likes sausage and chips”

I wouldn't go shining a blue light on that area.

I'm suing the BBC for a billion dollars to bring back Time Commanders.

I hate portmanteau words but “slopaganda” is magnificent

"A half - but in a pint glass please"

Noel Edmonds looking dashing #totp

UB40, the only band with more factional splits than Your Party #totp

Every iteration of UB40 has about twenty members to achieve their signature sound like the demo track on a Casio keyboard #totp

Literally went 'Oh FUCK'S sake' at the sight of UB40 #totp

Presumably 'the Cause' is kids who are tone-deaf #totp

The Corrs with a bold new sound, apparently #totp

Was Mase scared of flying or something? #TOTP

Brandy’s going to say Top of the Pops, isn’t she? #TOTP

It's Brandy! Not doing the one you'd like! #totp

Yer uncle bought an Oasis record #totp

Everyone having a good time? Bryan will soon change that #totp

Pointless Ace of Base cover that nobody remembers #totp

B*witched with the Double Deckers theme. #totp

Blimey, now Charlotte from Ash. Pray for the Bluesky Dads #totp

Even she's forgotten this while she's performing it #totp

The title definitely came before the song #totp

Saffron, though #totp

Nobody asked for an American remake of Space #totp

Claire and Fay from Steps should have shoulders like Venus Williams from carrying the other three #totp

Oh it's The Beautiful South, who we all have to pretend to like for some reason #totp

Cor, these bloody idiots in the Telegraph saying everything was better in 1975. Anyway, time for 1998 #totp!

Me watching Terry and June at 2:30am: THAT HOUSE IS PROBABLY WORTH MILLIONS NOW.

Everyone’s gangster until they hear their own voice on a recording.