Neil
@enanem.bsky.social
📤 1545
📥 110
📝 558
B’dum b’dum.
West Side Story really went downhill after the Jets jumped the Sharks.
1 day ago
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Neil
- I’m going into town today to look for a football shirt, you know that white one with a red diagonal stripe? - Peru’s - Have a look, yeah.
5 days ago
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No Nope Not yet Nearly Just a tiny bit more BURNT!
#ToastedTeacake
4 days ago
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I wouldn’t eat the snacks outside the toilets at The Crucible… a small percentage of the snooker loo peanuts are wee.
5 days ago
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- I’m going into town today to look for a football shirt, you know that white one with a red diagonal stripe? - Peru’s - Have a look, yeah.
5 days ago
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reposted by
Neil
Who’s your favourite Beatle: Jack Douglas, Charles Bronson, Rodney Bewes, or Richard O’Sullivan?
7 days ago
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Who’s your favourite Beatle: Jack Douglas, Charles Bronson, Rodney Bewes, or Richard O’Sullivan?
7 days ago
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I’ve got a hole in my pocket. No change there then.
10 days ago
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I’m at a car place, I need a new battery. I drove into a bay and popped my bonnet. The mechanic smiled, took my keys, then went and opened the boot, where my battery is.
19 days ago
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Hot-cross buns! Hot-cross buns! One a penny, two a penny, Hot-cross buns! - I’ll have two then please.
19 days ago
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Neil
Robert Wilfort
over 1 year ago
When you stub your toe half way through dictating a quote for a van
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My mate used to row for Cambridge, he was in the debating society.
19 days ago
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I just spent too long reading the comments under a sport related post on Facebook. Aside from the whole tiresome ‘banter’ thing, and the overuse of cry laugh emojis… a LOT of people can’t spell losing.
19 days ago
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I wonder who they got to play Pliers?
21 days ago
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It’s a good time to be posting puns about pensioners. They’re older age right now.
28 days ago
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Flapjack (n) A speculum.
28 days ago
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Holly came from Miami, F-L-A… I love it when Titchmarsh does his song.
loading . . .
about 1 month ago
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I always end postcards with: P.S. Are you still planning to kill your Postman?
about 1 month ago
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My wife and I are trying for a baby. Adults find us annoying as well.
about 1 month ago
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You can see the family resemblance.
about 1 month ago
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Rosie’s enjoyed Crufts today.
about 2 months ago
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Charles Dickens would contradict himself at the best of times.
about 2 months ago
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Crufts is on!
#COYD
about 2 months ago
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- What do you think of it so far? - Ruggish!
about 2 months ago
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World book day today. My son’s gone as Hagrid. He’s supposed to be the man from The Joy of Sex books, but his teacher called him Hagrid so…
about 2 months ago
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- I bought my wife an electric guitar for her birthday. - A fender? - A bit yeah, she wanted a necklace.
about 2 months ago
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There was no other apparatus free at the gym so I went on that Stair Master thing. Such Sisyphean torture. What a horrible experience, they may as well have a slice of cake on string hanging just out of reach above it.
about 2 months ago
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My favourite Irish reggae singer’s probably Pat O’Banton.
about 2 months ago
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I just did the international sign for ‘Can I have the bill please?’ and the waiter brought me a stylophone.
about 2 months ago
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Wow.
2 months ago
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Do you think?
2 months ago
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Oops, just realised, I've been writing in brackets since June).
2 months ago
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Oops upside your head, say oops upside your head.
3 months ago
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I thought my wife was joking when she told me she wanted to go to a Monkees' concert in Switzerland. Then I saw her face, now I'm in Geneva.
3 months ago
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If I won a million pounds the first thing I'd do is put a layer of caramel and chocolate on my shortbread.
3 months ago
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I've just realised, there really is a staircase behind our sofa. All these years I've been laughing when my wife walked down it.
3 months ago
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reposted by
Neil
Here we see the Seal Bar, nervously looking around, ever mindful of it's natural chocolate bar predator, The Club.
3 months ago
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Here we see the Seal Bar, nervously looking around, ever mindful of it's natural chocolate bar predator, The Club.
3 months ago
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It’s Squirrel Appreciation Day. I have a squirrel joke: Why did the squirrel sleep on the floor? Because he forgot about drey.
3 months ago
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reposted by
Neil
I’m reading Elvis Costello’s diary.
3 months ago
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I’m reading Elvis Costello’s diary.
3 months ago
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I once had a girl, or should I say, she once had me... - Oedipus.
3 months ago
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reposted by
Neil
… Le Freak, c'est Chic.
3 months ago
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… Le Freak, c'est Chic.
3 months ago
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This is my favourite version of this. Tim Buckley on The Monkees.
youtu.be/vaa22ULitds?...
loading . . .
Tim Buckley - Song to the Siren (The Monkees '68) Remastered HD
YouTube video by TheRightEarOfNash
https://youtu.be/vaa22ULitds?si=-iL3VARcg-t9bpAf
3 months ago
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That time an imposter gatecrashed a Man Utd team photo is very similar to what the eclair’s doing on the Heroes lid.
3 months ago
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Grandmaster Flash is swimming in that bear costume again. He's like a Bungle sometimes, it makes me wonder how he keeps from going under.
4 months ago
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The Ineluctable Weight of Living.
4 months ago
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Windmill Wanker & Friends.
4 months ago
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No rappers in the New Year Honours list again. It makes Sir Mix-A-Lot's achievement all the more impressive, doesn't it?
4 months ago
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