Every time I hear “economic forum,” I picture a bunch of people politely describing panic.

where's the feature to show when we're dead

The rhythm still hasn't gotten me, Gloria Estefan & The Miami Sound Machine. Please advise.

This checks out

Stop bleeding for people who never knew you were injured.

New year, new shit. Ray Commander Xandria. #art #characterdesign #illustration #dnd #tabletop #fantasy

Blah blah delete

I’m just a girl with a little booty, fairly big boobs, a big brain and a bigger heart

when Eminem falls into a black hole it’s called mom’s spaghettification

The birds in the garden keep singing, blissfully unaware of the global chaos. Must be nice.

Mexico called. They want us to finish the wall.

*wet towel drop*

Lao Tzu was a moron, every journey begins with a single step no matter how long it is.

Oh look at that it’s WhatTheFuckDay

Goal for the day...more coffee.

🖤

sometimes when people are awkward I misread it as a competition

I discover new music by driving through cemeteries with my Bluetooth on

my oldest brought me a gift home🥹 gonna craft it up, fools🤣✨

Jessica Fletcher and her typewriter will return in Avengers Doomsday

Have you tried not being like that? ~me, as therapist

bad mood rising

Practicing a lazy weekend. #dogsofbluesky

Sup Kurt?

When I can’t remember someone’s name, I imagine Don Pardo announcing them, and so far, not helpful.

Reply Guy? More like Reply Legend

The way things are going… it’s time to stock up on Slim Jim’s and Jolt Cola.

Everyone has a chapter in their life that they do not read out loud, some people have an entire book.

Change is easy. Smile, nod and then keep doing your own thing.

Pushing me over the edge might fix me.

reaching my hand above the soil to tickle your feet

There's always a ray of hope. Sometimes you just have to part the clouds in order to see it.

I think I might be done peopling. Like for good.

Being called “tense” means I’m edgy, right?

Tapped on a different feed on my phone and looked up at my computer screen. In the time it took for the feed to change, I forgot about it and scared the shit out of myself when I saw my phone flash from the corner of my eye. - The Dangers of Multitasking A True Story

Friday is the day you realize your plan to “eat better this week” starts next Monday. —But then you think, maybe next month.

Im only taking advice from my cats for now on. They seem to have their lives in order.

They call this “making a living.” It’s ironic because the living part seems to happen in the brief period between “laundry’s finely done” and “why is it Sunday night?”

Do you really need a time machine to kill Hitler?

fear the wrath of my whimsy!!

Technically taxidermists can also do your taxes and drive taxis.

401K sounds like too long of a run, no thanks.

timeline cleanse

Going into MLK weekend 2026

Whose brilliant idea was it to put milk in bags

would you rather have a beer at the pub with a strange man or a strange bear

I'll cancel plans just to be alone.

So much to do so little want to do it.

Never mind being a pain in the arse, some people are a pain in the mouth after a tooth extraction.