There's only ONE goal the GOP & national & local media want to achieve: Declare martial law and cancel elections. Everything you see and hear, whether it's an authentic organic event, image, or AI slop, is in service of that goal or will be used in service of that goal

Stepping in bird poo is the chicken soup of the sole

I'm better at stupid shit than politics, so I'll stick with that.

If you don't like the quiet, make some fucking noise.

Just got a notification that "Poop Cruise" is now on Netflix. Pretty appropriate for the world right now.

The worst thing I can say about Iran is that they’ve been led astray by a bunch of privileged jackasses who use religious BS to control a purposely ignorant populace. It’s also the worst thing about the U.S., Israel, and Russia, so there’s that.

That orange fuck can shut his fucking mouth on the holidays. He hasn't worked a day in his life.

Those masked "ICE" agents are proud boys and oath keepers. That's why they hide their faces.

Points my ass toward DC today.

Blocking Nazis, trolls, and fascists doesn’t make it an “echo chamber.” People need to stop gaslighting us into thinking we have to listen to Nazis and debate trolls in order to be informed.

*taps the sign*

Naked & Afraid but with billionaires.

At our prom we all slow-danced to Stairway to Heaven during the first part of the song but not one of us knew what the hell to do when the fast part started except Tommy Anderson who slipped out and kicked back against the bricks of The Lantana to smoke a joint fuck you Tommy you cool bastard

Bio today: Patriot, Constitutionalist 🇺🇸 Translated to their bio in 1775: Tory, Long live the King 🇬🇧

Let's call the "we need guns to protect us from a tyrannical govt" what it is: another example of white privilege. We've seen the pics of people open carrying. A black man would get 2 steps down the street before there would be 100 911 calls. Oh, they're twiddling their thumbs right now as well.

So let me get this straight. White people who wave around the Confederate flag claiming “it’s my heritage” are just fine … But Brown people waving the Mexican flag in a state that used to be part of Mexico because it’s their heritage is a crime … Got it.

It’s organized labor, not the Democratic Party, that is stepping up to fight against government overreach. This is not a surprise, labor is where the movement for our collective liberation will come from. Workers will lead the way. Join a union.

The 2A cosplayers sitting with their thumbs up their asses while the Government ignores the 5th Amendment (and a whole host of other shit) is telling. They just like looking threatening and scaring people.

Just got out the yoga ball, but not to work out *wink wink*

Dickhead.......😂

It’s exponentially easier to destroy than create. Everyone who ever made anything good knows this.

Don't destroy property when you prot...

For decades the NRA and other gun nuts told us that their guns were to protect us all from a tyrannical government. So a tyrannical government is here, they are all sitting on their asses, and the people who want gun control have taken to the streets to defy the tyrannical government instead.

I hate you guys. Please repost

You know you're old when you start traveling with your own antacids.

This is fuckin stupid *Me 20 times a day

The original multiverse

This is my son, Estupido

Mondays should come with more nudity

A moment of silence for my 13 year old printer, salvaged from a political campaign, subjected to above average use throughout business school and banking days, and somehow, never causing office space rage. Thank you for your service.

Cheese is like a wig for your cracker.

Gotta love getting a termination notice and then getting a ticket asking why the user can't login. I'm a spectator to all this.

I’ve been in a DEI training class most of the day because my employer isn’t a bigoted nazi pos

What we wouldn't give for just a normal level of fucked up so we can all get back to jokes

if the united states ever has even a hope of recovering we have to destroy the idea of american individualism. "they don't owe you anything" we owe each other everything actually

Cory for Senate Minority Leader.

Why the oligarchs aren’t worried about the stock market crashing: “In fact, for the stable rich, you know, hard times just mean cheaper prices, and so they just get great bargains on everything and do better than ever.” (Alice Walker, The Temple of My Familiar)

France raises a fascinating hypothetical point: what if the law still exists even if people might get mad at you

France’s institutions defended its democracy, upholding the law. South Korea’s institutions defended its democracy, upholding the law. Brazil’s institutions defended its democracy, upholding the law. Only America’s decided a criminal must be allowed to break its laws and destroy its democracy.

Well done France. Fuck you Garland.

"Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone home?"

Them: how hard do you laugh at your own jokes? Me:

So 3 months ago my boss called me up to his office and told me he was told to get me out of my office immediately. Next week it gets filled. Finally.

beautifully haunted by ghost pepper ranch packets 💫

🔺Doritos has entered the Bluesky🔺

Might be trouble over at the neighbors