at last, we have invented retrophenology from the classic Discworld text Don’t Invent Retrophenology

The Star of David has no connection to Molech #maklelan3148 youtu.be/DFbiO8Ntcps

Canadiana, aw yeah

the purpose of a rube goldberg machine is what it does eventually

lmao the Supremes gave him an off-ramp and he's doubling down on touching the money and also all the other shit everyone hates. Incredible instincts Mr President sir

Reading your palm: Wow… this is quite the life line… you will live a long healthy life!! Reading your skull: Too bad you’ll be Irish during it

This wheel is to the boy squirrel the way that the football is to Charlie Brown and it still makes me laugh every time he tries to use it only to be immediately spun.

Was trying to remember a Will Forte quote from Tim & Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie and accidentally figured out how to make Google’s AI tool shut up

Thanks for more than a decade of love, little man. I'm glad you got to enjoy the false spring before you had to go. I love you, little bear

I would shoot the computer with a handgun five to eight times

AI filmmaking is completely unserious. You've got people with $30k begging the internet for ideas by next week because they have nothing of their own to say, it's just slop for the sake of slop. Embarrassing state of affairs.

Tonight’s dumb napkin cartoon…

Charles Ephebophile Cheese

Check this shit out motherfucker [I slide one foot out from under me and fall on my ass, the camera matrix-style swings 180 degrees making clear what kind of move I was trying to do]

my wife: we have to wear what we died in for eternity!? st. peter: that’s right me: [from the back end of our horse costume] what’d he say

New Wilhelm scream

"Fight against being ass" is a message that more people need to receive, tbh

sorry i missed the virtual meeting on discord, liz. i got hit with the id verification that happens when the app detects youre young

Geritol's been a punchline for as long as I can remember, but apparently there's Bluesky sponsorship potential.

I skate onto the ice to the opening chords of “We Are Charlie Kirk” wearing a sequined version of his usual white dress shirt & black slacks a long red cape flowing behind me I check to make sure the squibs are secure in the collar of my costume I give my partner in the stands a quick thumbs up

Every Super Bowl ad was just “HEY REMEMBER THIS SHIT? HUH? YOU REMEMBER THE POP CULTURE YOU CONSUMED THAT ONE TIME IN YOUR LIFE WHEN NOT ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING FUCKING SUCKED. REMEMBER THAT?? brought to you by a company causing your electric bill to increase 287%”

King George, 1782:

No Kings includes Draft Kings

If there's ever been a time to NOT be incrementalist, this is it. The most political capital you're gonna have is right now. And we got Gestapo death squads in MSP and TB spreading through concentration camps in Texas. If you can't find a win there, get out of politics. The Epstein Class, baby

Having a limited run beet and dill beer at my local microbrewery and god damn is this good

tfw you leave Plato’s cave awfulannouncing.com/nfl/pat-mcaf...

I'm sorry the guy changing the rules on the fly is named what

Happy Friday

Golden snake with gold eyes and a super super-duper long tail, welcome to the war on cars.

Can't believe ICE recruited Still Wancil, the Waluigi of Will Stancil

Generational. Political. Talent.

krugman is spiking the football and doing an end zone dance

Incredible stuff happening at Spencer’s Gifts

Renfeild: I booked your passage on the Demeter, master Dracula: thankfs. dont foret the box of,, dert

I've reread this like 3 times. Freed herself from slavery by running away, *went back a week later bc the slaver was talking shit, set his house on fire, and then escaped again is absolutely incredible queen shit

After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all

free dril

Favourite song I didn't see already in the replies, I Love You 'Cause I Have To by Dogs Die in Hot Cars: youtu.be/_4YLq_PJJRk?...

...horrifying message without context, thank you