Gimme food, gimme fries, gimme salad on the side!

Name a TV show you're positive no one remembers but you.

Stalin’s .32 S&W dagger, gifted from American communists in 1944. It featured firing chambers and an engraved blade. “Death to fascist invaders”

just a reminder that practically half of entire fucking countries are here for the world cup because all european countries have a shit ton of paid vacation given to them every year by law. america needs to get on their level.

The #ChicagoHounds have scored 57pts, 59pts (twice) and 61pts this season! For those wondering, this hardly gets close to the highest scoring #MLR games ever. The Top 5 start in the high 90s! #MLRStats #MLR2026

Todd Blanche moved convicted sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell to a minimum-security prison & declared the matter should "not be part of anything going forward." Under his watch: 2M+ Epstein documents unreleased & 47K files deleted. A vote for Blanche is a vote to protect predators. #BlockBlanche

I cannot say this loudly enough: we need everyone to know what is happening at Delaney Hall. 300 detainees inside are on Day 7 of a hunger and labor strike as of today. ICE is beating, gassing, tasing and assaulting protestors outside every night, and it is getting worse.

Life hack: eat 2 corn dogs and now you have a pair of chopsticks

Just told him I don’t drink tequila because it gives me rug burn. Please stand by

Happy "tRump's Name Removed From The Wall Of The John F. Kennedy Center For The Performing Arts" Day to all those who celebrate! 🥂

Please sir, my lips, they are flaming

Everybody in America right now:

a worker on the scaffolding turns around and a spotlight finds him. it's lin-manuel miranda! he begins to rap about john f kennedy. we've been had

Holy crap this live stream is so boring.

I used to be a voter, like you. Then I took an arrow to the dick.

I can’t wait until politics is over.

Just saw two facts back-to-back that blew my mind in a bad way: 1. The Ukraine war has now lasted longer than WWI. 2. You are now closer in wealth to Jeff Bezos than Jeff Bezos is to Elon Musk.

Found on Facebook:

Why does every realtor appear so unhinged in their pics. Like bro, did you just murder your entire family?

Everything in The A-Team is canon to Star Trek if you think of it as a holo-program by Reginald Barclay. I’m sure that’s been said before.

Please sir, my Samoans, they are angry.

Please sir, my pumpkins, they are smashed.

8 hobbits is called a hobbyte

“group chat” you mean hellthread??

.... the bus driver just pulled over, got out, and hoofed it across the street to a Family Dollar store. 😶

Dear every android application that is not a camera app but still saves downloaded pictures in the camera folder: Fuck You, eat a bag of dicks and get gonorrhea.

Ahh, summer delights…

𝘐'𝘥 𝘓𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘛𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘚𝘪𝘯𝘨 is my favorite song about people in general being awful singers.

“let the pizza rest for five min-“ the pizza can rest when it’s dead

*covered in mosquito bites* i’m a blood donor

trans rights actually aren't extra rights they're just the same rights everybody else has that you're trying to take away from trans people. sorry you have trouble with this, but it means you're a bigot not that we're wrong.

I need this for like six months.

makes sense

CONFIRMED: The Wonka Scotland Oompa Loompa girl has formerly withdrawn from President Trump's America 250 concert.

😖😖

Okay, Seattle sportsballpuck bluesky! Tonight is the last game of the season for the Seattle Seawolves and US Major League Rugby. If you're not cheering them on at Starfire, you can watch on ESPN. Let's go fellas! Go get that home field advantage for the playoffs. Whoo hooo! 🏉

The only answer a man should have to me being ace/aro is "okay that's cool" AND NOT ANYTHING ANNOYING OR RUDE lmao.

@espn.com please add a timer to the yellow/red card graphic in your MLR broadcasts?

I turn 51 this month and I decided that I'm not going out feeble. This is what a year of lifting and proper nutrition did for me 😁

When the timeline is in perfect harmony

STOP RECORIDNG THE ENTIRE CONCERT WITH YOUR PHONE Everyone behind you can only see your phone. Inconsiderate pricks.

we tried 22 viral high protein dessert recipes instead of making something thats good

tgif is short for thursday graphics interchange format. not many people know this

Bluesky: tell my your food crimes I love a saltine topped with whipped cream.

First guitar I bought myself was a made-in-USA Fender Strat Deluxe Plus in high school. Still have it. With all the stupid C&D letters they're sending out to makers of Strat-style guitars I'm tempted to find money to buy a Silver Sky.

Godfather of the bride

Merge two movies: Some Like It Hot Fuzz