“so what’s your take?” “the city of New York must pay me $1 million cash in the next hour and I will kill one person for every minute they are late” “100% disagree”

RIP freud. you would’ve loved whatever this is.

Every time Matt Damon takes on a period role he ends up looking like a third baseman for the Phillies.

oh also now that pictures are working again I can share the Penn Whippoorwill I saw yesterday LOOK AT HIS LITTLE SLEEPY SCRUNCHY FAAAAACE 😭😭😭 #birds

Can confirm!!

Meanwhile, AI:

I know it's not the main point but why can none of this type of guy just get a normal haircut

Little guy alert #birds

this would be an amazing way for It to happen

I found it, the most deranged way a grocery store has ever displayed pasta sauce

Backhus ass outta here

Iran is going to win the Super Bowl next year

it’s beautiful to think One Battle inspired a whole new generation to read Thomas Pynchon’s wikipedia page

Maybe a country that has vision insurance should host the next WBC

Is it a good sign for a society when even the shills of capitalism have moved on from hopeful aspiration (use our products to get what you want) to hopeless resignation (use our products to pretend you got what you want)?

you may not like it but this is what peak cooking performance looks like

i was literally going to post the picture with "look at this jim henson shit" and then when i read the article: "...which have been designed and made specially by Emmy award-winning puppeteer, Bill Diamond – one of the creators of the Muppets!"

If you want a delightfully bad time keep clicking through.

If this wasn't marketed as a "Chilly Dog" race I'm burning the whole place down

Meeeellltingggg

Remember, friends, birds is dinosaurs.

take goo

Blackberries: the flavor is mid and the seed-to-fruit ratio sucks.

need this to viral so people will get it when I say this for the rest of my life

AHHHHHHHHHHHH 🌿🪶 (This is telephoto lens + harsh crop to maintain a respectful distance!)

Tinker Tailor Shitposter Spy

There was a woman behind me in line to get on the plane in Ft Meyers wearing a red "MAKE REAL ESTATE GREAT AGAIN" cap and if that doesn't perfectly sum up SW FL I don't know what does

They still can cook on X The Everything App

omg everybody go draw a horse this is what the internet was made for gradient.horse

Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl performance required 9,852 theatrical pyrotechnics, nearly 400 costumed extras, and a lot of ingenuity. And yes, that was a real couple featured in the wedding. www.wired.com/story/bad-bu...

This kind of smart, walkable, mixed-use urbanism is illegal to build in most American cities.

Drunken Seahawks Fans Climbing Space Needle

no eres mis casa bonita no eres mis esposa bonita

Tuff

GM: Charisma check. Mamdani: [rolls natural 20] GM: that’s a d6 how did you Mamdani: [direct to camera] Did you know you can check out board games at your local public library? 😊

LOL.... i wanted to hear JD getting booed at the Olympics and when i searched for it on YouTube i got this

Everyone in this picture looks like a character from the Bioshock universe

My tv attempting to close caption it 😂😂

IMPORTANT OLYMPIC NEWS: THE POLISH FIGURE SKATING TEAM HAS A PLUSH PIEROGI

🤌🇮🇹🤌🇮🇹🤌

Mongolia and Haiti correctly identified that the Winter Olympics are primarily a chance to design baller cold weather uniforms

DOCTOR: I told him he needed to get out to a show, that was how he would cure his depression. CHOTINER: So you learned this technique in school? DR: No, not— listen it was good advice. Pagliacci was in town. C: Right. Is it standard to give advice before learning a patient’s name? DR: Now look

bro whistles are the NICE option. do you really want to challenge 1,000 nerds with 3D printers to invent something louder and more annoying???