Watching the Sam Altman press conference. Looks like he brought a bagged lunch, smart.

I need democratic strategists to stop watching The West Wing and understand that if you’re under 40 this is getting asked for $20 by the guy who didn’t understand his “I would have voted for Obama a third time” line in Get Out was a joke.

wanna feel old? 2025 was six years ago.

is an MLB team allowed to make a trade with the Savannah Bananas?

BREAKING: Greyhound adds “Well look who’s not too good to ride the bus anymore” banner to website

“Put ICE agents at the security checkpoints of every major American airport” is a great idea if your goal is to make “Abolish ICE” an 80-20 issue by June.

Nebraska - Iowa Sweet Sixteen matchup

if Florida isn’t gonna play the 7’9” kid outside garbage time they should at least have him doing TikTok dances on the sideline or something. give the people what the want.

if Thimothée isn’t at this St. John’s game then that Knicks shit was just for show.

“Chappell Roan wanted to be famous, now she has to understand that it me-” You bolt back to attention. It is September 26th, 1983. The visions you had do not exist. They must never exist. You turn back to the “incoming missile” warnings on your console. You push back your doubts and follow protocol.

I haven’t watched the Justin Timberlake DUI footage yet because I’m saving it for a special occasion.

30 Rock joke where Tracy posts this word for word but it’s about Billy Mays after he ruined a shirt misusing OxiClean

I literally cannot remember the time Everton had a result like thrashing Chelsea 3-0. David Moyes I will kiss you on the mouth.

up the toffees, in this economy?

Ryan Gosling with Russell Crowe - Flop Ryan Gosling with Emily Blunt - Flop Ryan Gosling with a weird little rock dude - America can't fucking get enough

walking up to strangers in Philly and asking them if they know they live in Chris Sanchez’s city

I feel bad for anyone who doesn’t watch Women’s March Madness too. There is nothing on the Men’s side that compares to rooting for Kim Mulkey’s downfall.

we are monitoring the Siena Men’s Basketball situation.

“Who am I rooting for in March Madness? Women.” GETS HANDED NOTE SAYING THERE’S AN ENTIRE BRACKET FOR WOMEN [VISIBLY SWEATING] “Uh, the good women.” CROWD BOOS “I mean the bad ones.” CROWD BOOS LOUDER

trying to decide who would be the funniest team to trigger a “well, there goes my bracket!” by losing would be and I think it’s Nebraska. they’re a 4 seed so it’s plausible but the idea of someone having the Cornhuskers in their Elite Eight is just really funny.

NCAA Tournaments used to have Temple in them and we as a nation need to bring that back.

Aaron Judge is 34 and still looking for a signature moment that isn’t from like a 5-2 game in August.

world champion, baby

My country, Venezuela 🇻🇪

bullying works.

"I thought Duncan Idaho died in Part 1, why is he in the new trailer?"

Eric Adams never called me Taig

“Zohran has to performatively pander to Irish Republicans” would be a fun ten day side plot so I’ll do my part to keep it in the news.

ZohTan Mamdani

Maya Rudolph gently suggesting to Paul that maybe he could try taking a project that'll turn a profit now.

My one other Oscar take is that it's time we go back to five nominees for Best Picture. It's going to leave some good movies out but like that's the point. We do not need to keep living in a world where F1 and Train Dreams are Best Picture nominees.

me getting ready to finish in the bottom third of my office March Madness pool again

The best part of Oscars season being over is that I don't have to see film opinions from people who watch maybe two movies a year for at least another ten months.

society if Mark DeRosa didn’t get a text reminding him the game against Italy still counted right before he was going to put Kershaw in

you can’t convince me that ump didn’t have a “get Team USA in the Final by any means necessary” directive going into those final two innings.

He gets to just go by Michael Jordan for a year now. That basketball player has to go by “Michael J” until 2027.

The Academy the second someone on that Golden songwriting team besides the singer tried taking the microphone

“Autumn Durald Arkapaw has become the first woman to win the Academy Award for Best Cinematography!”

I know this scene kinda took on a life of its own as a meme but you really do have to give credit to just casually shooting out “yeah, the IRA are going to win” from the hip in 1990 as probably the funniest thing a Star Trek show has ever done.

ohtani when no one on the opposing team is drinking raw milk or taking bone supplements they bought off infowars

shohei when he finally had to play a team that didn’t have one prep school kid with some dumb name like “braxton” on it

Shohei begging for a catcher’s interference call on the world’s stage down two in the seventh, the Linsanity run is finally over.

when “a rainy night in soho” comes on the st. patrick’s playlist

the Italians winning the weekend before St. Patrick’s Day doesn’t sit right with me.

everton, that