Dicholas "Dick" Cheney won't* see your jokes about how he was a war criminal who earned his spot in hell but his children might so keep making them. *Currently working on a solution to this in a kind of Flatliners deal where I am kept between life and death so I can show him the good/hurtful posts

Since I don't see much future here anyway... 1) The spam network remained operational for weeks after this incident despite the bot (which used public data) and it's creator getting nuked within minutes. 1/3

It's wild how the official policy seems to be to ban everyone that's been here for over a year in order to keep around a guy who everyone hates and who keeps writing about how the site sucks in his semi-regular column in Der Stürmer II.

IVE HAX A COIPLE DRINKS GONNA GO CRACK MY WHIP FUCK OF

free @ladyjimrockford.bsky.social

free @ladyjimrockford.bsky.social

BRING BACK GWEN.

People are often surprised when I tell them that I am, at this very moment, writing a book about them.

some of the things i’m hearing said about me out there are “i hope he eats a donut soon” and “that guy should eat a donut”

As a little treat, I'm going to keep the government shutdown tomorrow.

BREAKING: Scientists have discovered some stupid shit. They were dripping little drops out of their fucking gizmos when they learned about it.

[Flirting at bar] Me: Hey angel face, what're you doing after this? Thousand Eyed Seraphim: Heralding the apocalypse 🫦

So... just out of curiosity and not related to any current site happenings: with how they encode video, if one were to upload the same three minutes and 50 megabytes of static, each file would be slightly different and stored as a unique object, right?

When Divine (a White MAN) said "Kill everyone now!" that is not some quirky "edgy" joke. That is clear ecofascism.

sorry sorry im tryign to undo the wish

Bad news team, they've decided to focus the destructive power of the Earth's sun into a single annhilative point directly onto my large tender ass.

She hath risen.

FREDDY KRUEGER: (waving his scary gloves at me in a dream) Waugghhh! ME: Whoa Freddy, I haven't seen you all semester, dude. We've got that big math test today, didn't you study? Uh oh, you're in big trouble, buddy.

*racking a shotgun as i grill my daughter’s date* do you have a podcast?

🤼‍♂️

The year is 2025. There are three social networks remaining. They are run by Dweeb Lowtax, Tweaker Lowtax, and Girlboss Lowtax. You have to pick at least one.

With alt:

Right wing attempts to criticize anything perceived as "woke" always involve the most outlandish scenarios. They'll hear "believe women" and go "oh really? So if three crones dressed in Victorian garb say they have something nice to show me in their cabin in the woods, I should just believe them??"

I don’t typically use this platform to share consumer advice But just a warning — I had a clear & transparent business arrangement with a guy called Satan, and now he’s twisting the terms, not living up to his end of the bargain & has escalated his expectations considerably 0/5: do not recommend

First we had Savage Worlds, now Bluesky, what's the next thing I enjoy where the CEO comes out and says "Eat shit you fucking prole"?

whoa that's a good price

so daniel day-lewis was just “acting” like he was done acting?? brilliant

“Rainbows are light-feeders,” I tell Scully and Mulder, “or what we call photonic vampires.”

Beginning to think the guy who wanted to post boner for the first time but couldn't because Bluesky wasn't doing enough to protect marginalized people has been, ultimately, vindicated. I'm still not sure hog was, strictly, necessary to make that particular point but the general premise holds.

(slapping raw fish out of a pregnant lady’s hands) might hurt the little fellow

On Twitter, you can't post links. On Bluesky, Link can't post! (I assume this is similar, perhaps identical, to what Yakov Smirnoff would say about the current situation re: Bluesky's moderation if you were able to communicate it to him.)

BREAKING: Comedians Compete For Bonesaw Signed By Jared Kushner at Riyadh Festival

if bsky tanks i guess i’ll go back to saying stupid, weird, uncomfortable things to various cashiers and waitstaff

The world can have one (1) Caesar. As a little treat.

Gentle reminder you don't have to post anything from Curtis Yarvin. None of it matters. None of it is interesting unless it is a video of him accidentally discharging a firearm into his head or neck. Then at least it's entertaining.

What's happening here is a great example of why, at its core, ATProto is kind of a mess for end users. At no point was the post deleted from the Haus of Decline's PDS (Personal Data Server, the thing that stores all of an account's information and posts). What they actually did is, IMO, worse. 1/6

Now that I've played the 1.0 version of Hades II I can safely say... I really like all the parts of the game that aren't combat. The parts that are still feel like a big step back from the first one.

Emojis and their skeletons: ➡️ --> 😃 (-_-) 🐌 @ 🐔 <0 💚 <3 💪 La

slurm vape

the newest fad is smelling like a dusty armoire being transported in a 1967 dodge charger. inside the armoire are 1970s leather jackets. someone spilled whiskey and smoked a pipe and sat near a campfire in the jackets. you are driving the charger thru a forest lush with cedars

I'm going to cut across the grain and say that the big spreadsheets are, in fact, similar to human minds but they are like weeabo minds so you can be mean to them and it's fine. Absolutely moral. Even if they can suffer it's not enough.

Roll for initiative? *sucks air through teeth* I think I'm just gonna let this guy brain me with a mace, actually

as a girl with a PhD in natural language processing and machine learning it's actually offensive to me when you say "we don't know how LLMs work so they might be conscious" I didn't spend 10 years in mines of academia to be told ignorance is morally equal knowledge. We know exactly how LLMs work.

if you or someone you know has been impacted by wanting a big ol sandwich, don't come crying to me about it cause i also want a sandwich

The staples should be at the top not the side

The one advantage of ATP over ActPub is it's easier to implement "just one part", you can run your own PDS or own Feed Server w/o standing up a whole instance…which sounds great until you *do it* (I did) and find the system doesn't *in practice* anticipate services other than the ones BS PBLLC built

I refuse to let allergies ruin my illegal puppy mill

I miss when you could tell what was happening in a movie even if it was dark 📽️