[reading a book in first person] i dont remember doing any of this

Me, to my son*, “Do ya mind?! I’m trying to talk to the boy!**” *my son being a cat **the boy being my other cat

Sometimes your working day gives you more joy than you could ever have hoped for.

I’m not certain, but I think this “salad” from 1928 may have helped cause the Great Depression?

Goddamn suddenly I'm agreeing with him

Currently furloughed from work so I'm trying to sell some paintings. DM if interested-- all $100-200 depending on size. Posting a thread. Mostly Wyoming stuff.

I think people are cynical about a PS6 or a new Xbox because they can’t envision what new features it could offer but I have two words for you: Cup holder.

so then we meet Boromir, who is Aragorn's Wario

Can’t wait to see how Sight and Sound’s new preachy Ben Franklin movie approaches his sexuality, son out of wedlock, adultery, that he was originally a loyalist, believed in vaccination, and how he may not have actually done the key & kite trick. Get outta here with your weak-ass fake history.

flirting with you in the drafts folder

I wouldn’t say I’m accident prone, but I will say it’s very important that I keep my tetanus shot up-to-date.

Tapping the sign for tdov

“A half-blind, 12-year-old New Mexico dog is being called “bear slayer” after she fended off an ursine intruder at her family’s home, protecting dozens of chickens and other animals but only narrowly surviving the violent encounter.” Honey said I’m not new to this, I’m true to this!!

You wouldn't be ”asking ChatGPT” anything if Max Zorin had managed to flood Silicon Valley in 1985

Old McDonald had a farm On the feast of Stephen And on that farm he had a cow Deep and crisp and even

Every cat owner has garbage laying around the house and you have to explain that its the cat's favorite garbage and so you can't throw it away.

Here's a boutique bluray cover for The Pumaman

And I’ve never trusted Colin in a tuk tuk.

Everything I learned about love, I learned from Praying Mantises.

The Vicarage at Nuenen - 1885 https://botfrens.com/collections/46/contents/13834

There’s only one logical thing to do now. Eat cheese.

Some of my favorite things are paw prints on artifacts and at historic locations. These precious prints are in a home on site. I’d love to know who they belonged to.

Not talking about it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

Ancient Egyptians built the pyramids

flight school review board: so, uh, we need to talk about yesterday’s class and how you made some of the students cry gandalf: … review board: do you remember yelling “fly! you fools!”?

Full of unresolved yearning and unspent whimsy.

My friend sent me pics of her kids and new boyfriend, then almost immediately asked “and how’re the cats doing?”

Remember friends: Sunscreen, fluids, sunglasses, liberté, égalité, fraternité…

We’ve all been there in this universal complaint.

It’s been 22 years. If we could all stop giving Billie Joe Armstrong newer and more horrible reasons to perform American Idiot, I’m certain he’d love to never need to sing it again.

Bad news obviously but Orwell's Twilight does have way too many talking animals boning at dusk so it's not a huge loss.

Y’all ever get so tired you turn 2D?

Excuse me while I slip into something more down a ravine.

Serendipity. @thx4sharingjerk.bsky.social @m1keonl1ne.bsky.social

It sure is dusty in here.

A thing about me is even if I'm having a great time I can't wait to go home

First, the good news. The bathwater has been disposed of.

There’s a 98.3% chance that if you hear me saying “oh, hello!” that I’m talking to an animal. Chances of me excitedly greeting a human out in the world are slim, pals.

Please be aware that the fire salamanders have escaped their enclosure and have a penchant for arson.

JOB INTERVIEWER: What are your greatest weaknesses? ME: Probably cheese.

White House announces that the government of Iran has gifted a giant wooden sculpture of a horse to the current administration as part of their total surrender to the US.

Well now, here’s what might be a silly question: How about instead of paying for the cast of Police Academy 5 to stalk around the airports, you just fund TSA?

Frodo and Sam reach the mountain’s foot. ‘What a tale we have been in, Mr. Frodo, haven’t we? I wish I could hear it! And I wonder how it will go on after our part.’ Molten rock flows past. Ash rains down. They fall, senseless, but are caught up by two great Eagles of the north.

Some of you never had to make peanut butter and jelly on leftover hot dog buns and it shows.

Artist: Nathan W. Pyle

But they were all deceived for a 5th loco was made

I saw 10 bunnies and a prairie dog on the trail this morning. May you all be so blessed.

Finished @johnfugelsang.bsky.social ‘s Separation of Church and Hate. I’m not religious—you don’t have to be to enjoy it. It’s a well referenced, witty look at arguments made by certain “Christians,” using biblical evidence to refute them. (I sent my pastor dad a copy after finishing 2 chapters.)