I’d forgotten how much I love the entirely unhinged Graham Crowden

22 May? Well, it must be the 159th anniversary of the day one aristocrat got his own back on another – who three years earlier had stolen his fiancée – via the medium of a spectacular win at the Derby. Yes, it’s time for a tale of 19th century marital shenanigans, lotharios... and horseracing 🧵

Well, to begin with today: happy 123rd anniversary to this extraordinary literary lineup of leather on willow enthusiasts

Latest thing from this wonderfully odd book: Maria de Agreda, who wrote a 2,800-page biography of the Virgin Mary, has just been denounced for (among other things) “smelling of legendary nonsense”, so I messaged my sister to tell her and said TYTI. Obviously

Herne the Hunter, striding through an adoring paparazzi of cow parsley. (Took a few attempts to get Herne through autocorrect, my phone constantly defaulting to Hermes. How my phone sees the pantheon of old Gods)

Facebook memories. Morning all

Currently on episode 6 of this. Wonderful performances and production values and all that - but while one shouldn’t judge old drama by today’s standards, it’s… well, sedate

21 May is the anniversary of an unusual synod. It was 644 years ago, and involved heresy, nonconformism, and an earthquake in the Straits of Dover. The full story also takes in a little light beheading and posthumous excommunication... 🧵

After the embarrassment of riches we had yesterday – a whole four historical anniversaries – things have got a bit silly today, and I have five...

There is a splendidly silly joke in the fourth paragraph of this, and I commend it to the nation

Tommy had her claws trimmed last night. She was as happy about this as you might imagine

Am I missing something, or is it irrelevant which policies Burnham does and doesn’t agree with? If he becomes PM, he governs on the platform Labour were elected on, doesn’t he? Unless he then calls a general election and wins that? And surely Labour wants to avoid a GE until absolutely necessary?

3. It’s the 89th anniversary of some of the most splendid radio commentary ever delivered. You may have heard it before, but it is always joyful. “When I say lit up, I mean lit up by fairy lamps!”

It’s the 1,701st anniversary of the start of the First Council of Nicaea which debated how divine yer man Jesus was compared to his old dad (I paraphrase slightly) – and at which St Nicholas (yes, that one, but pre-sainthood) got so angry with one speaker, he twatted him one 🧵

2. It’s also the 279th anniversary of Scottish doctor James Lind beginning one of the first ever clinical trials – the one which showed him that citrus fruits cured scurvy, which means...

FOUR historical anniversaries today! 1. When universities are inexplicably inviting overpaid arseholes to try to sell one of the most worthless tools ever devised to graduates with freshly honed critical faculties who are having fucking none of it, it’s good to remember this from 36 years ago

It’s the 1,701st anniversary of the start of the First Council of Nicaea which debated how divine yer man Jesus was compared to his old dad (I paraphrase slightly) – and at which St Nicholas (yes, that one, but pre-sainthood) got so angry with one speaker, he twatted him one 🧵

FOUR historical anniversaries today! 1. When universities are inexplicably inviting overpaid arseholes to try to sell one of the most worthless tools ever devised to graduates with freshly honed critical faculties who are having fucking none of it, it’s good to remember this from 36 years ago

It’s Cher’s 80th birthday! She’s amazing. youtu.be/lVmwqKY9BX0?...

This book is still delivering riches. Today: the patron saint of the internet

Ah! 19 May: the feast day of St Dunstan – famous for grasping Satan by the nose with a pair of hot tongs 🧵

This is such a good feature

Can recommend. Read it this year. Lovely book

No, fuck off

It’s the 49th anniversary of Sandra Ilene West being buried in her Ferrari. She was just 38 when she died, but had already been a widow for nine years. Her husband, Ike, had been just 33 when he died under mysterious circumstances in Las Vegas in 1968... 🧵

Ah! 19 May: the feast day of St Dunstan – famous for grasping Satan by the nose with a pair of hot tongs 🧵

My favourite #kakapo nest from this year was Whetu's on Anchor: she was 2m off the ground, 2m down a hollow rata trunk, with an entrance so small we had to use a phone camera to see inside. It was the only nest we didn't get into. #kakapo2026 #conservation #parrots

Ooh, that’s good stuff

Well, I missed the 11th anniversary of this on Sunday, which was an appalling dereliction of duty, but good morning anyway

i googled this image's text because i thought it was funny and google's ai result nearly killed me

It’s the 199th anniversary of the ‘Murder in the Red Barn’, which wasn’t discovered for a year, but when it was, the perpetrator was hanged, skinned, and used to bind a book... 🧵

This strikes me as A Good Thing

Well, it’s 18 May, so it must be time to celebrate excrement in art. No, not that man who shat in tins again – something on a much larger but equally splendid scale: the eighth anniversary of the giant poo sculptures of Rotterdam 🧵

Just remembered I made this, too, a few years ago

Post a meme made by you…

Normally, no.6 is the danger zone: you will be sucked into a game you can never stop playing, but Landmarkr is goo- Gah!

Post a meme(s) made by you. Please enjoy the things that I’d like to become part of Internet tom-tittery.

Post a meme made by you

Only just noticed the second part of the alt text prompt on here - about five minutes after I saw one of those ‘post a Bond from images already on your phone’ posts and thought “that could be funny or a good idea, but I don’t know who the fuck it is”

Post a meme made by you

Post a meme made by you

Loved Supergrass in their heyday

Friends fear the sad old fuck is once again listening to albums released when he was 16

Today is the 116th anniversary of a small dog taking part in Edward VII’s funeral procession, which “endeared him to the nation” and gave rise to one of the most powerful literary emetics ever published 🧵

It’s the 126th anniversary of the Relief of Mafeking after the small town containing about 2,000 British troops spent 217 days under siege from 5,000 Boers, during which there had been food shortages, sneaked out messages – and a truce every Sunday when the British played polo 🧵

I know I've talked about this before, but I do think the secret for progressive politics in the UK is unlocking the power of the capable, liberal, pissed-off middle-aged woman. One of worst things about McSweeneyism has been the tedious, boarish sexism that pushed through tedious, illiberal policies

Splendidly mad bit in this book: Teresa of Avila is told that, just in case her ecstatic visions are actually demonic temptations, she should tell Jesus to fuck off whenever he appears to her

It’s the 51st anniversary today of one of the most marvellous examples on record of life (almost) imitating art, when #OTD in 1975, far-right wanker Colin Jordan, former chairman of the ‘British Movement’, was up in court for nicking ladies’ underwear from Tesco 🧵