happy presidents day

Valentines Day should be an eggnog holiday too.

that goes double for Denny's "Moons Over My Hammy". it's a two party system designed to keep you weak and afraid

I'm going to put one of these in my house for myself.

My kid asked why his dad takes fish oil supplements the other day. I told him people give them to show dogs to help make their coats shiny, but his dad probably has some other reason.

you give me and the fellas 24 ice cold high life bottles and we’ll come up with 8-12 new must see Winter Olympics sports, I know that

Why did OSU try to recruit Robert Trivers and why didn't they explain to him that their university is not named "Oklahoma in Stillwater?" www.justice.gov/epstein/file...

In 1965 E.J. Josey became the first Black librarian in the Georgia Library Assoc. which had been whites-only for 68 yrs. He co-founded the Black Caucus of ALA and became president of ALA in 1984. He wrote the Handbook of Black Librarianship. #BlackHistoryMonth www.libraryjournal.com/story/E-J-Jo...

That time I recreated the Pokémon intro using only stock footage.

METEOROLOGISTS: We don’t hype up storms. We just forecast the weather to the best of our expertise and resources. Others may sensationalize things, but that’s not what we do ALSO METEOROLOGISTS: We call this particular weather phenomenon a “bomb cyclone”

scoreboard

“Why one small American town won’t stop stoning its residents to death,” an AO3 fic in which Isaac Chotiner interviews the guy who runs the lottery in Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery”, is astounding. archiveofourown.org/works/73396436

My scheming vizier when I start to cough after taking a swig of wine from my goblet

Love to start the morning in an elementary school's tornado shelter.

DO YOU DISAVOW TOTALITARIANISM SIR

for nathan so loved the world, he gave his only behotten dog

Oh my god oh my god oh my goddddd the local aquarium has three new born otters and they CHIRP

The mortadella cookies confuse and disgust me. I have to have one.

That fuck Adam Duritz has done it again. It is proving to be a Long God Damned December, all right.

you have been visited by the Quail of the Double Top Knot. Like for good luck. Ignore to go fuck yourself.

Damn dude, the PT Cruiser wasn't the hit you thought it would be. Let it go.

Yesterday I killed a mosquito in my house and today it's snowing.

Reading old court transcripts and, I mean, whomst

Please do not animate the snowmen into golemn. Several of the local youth have been teaching them about mortality and they art not taking it well.

there should be more thursday-based holidays, based purely on their ability to utterly fuck up a work week

The real war on cattle was me attempting to eat this whole butter cow.

This has to be just an AI attempt at Avril Levigne, right?

I genuinely look forward to seeing what fun mishaps this scamp gets up to in prison.

librarians are rent boys. "librarian" is an oppressive class, like adult people or demisexual people.

Let me get this straight: you think there is no frigate like a book? I do. And I’m tired of pretending there is.

send this post to your friends who love cocks open.substack.com/pub/ryanmand...

A bit of a squabble over the suet feeder. This shot definitely has some meme potential. (Blue Jay vs Hairy Woodpecker) #birds 🌿

A local bank used to fly a flag for each school in the Big 12. They've given up and just have 12 OU flags now.

Couldn't remember Jon Hamm's name or the name of his character. So I made a discovery

learned hamburger helplessness

Today I’ve seen horse trailers in an apartment parking lot and in a Chico’s parking lot.

she’s a 10 but Excel thinks she’s October

What the hell's a Kubernete?

Diminutive fairy wombat poop. Tiny cubes under 2mm on each side. These are egg sacs made by a spider in the family Theridiosomatidae. They made yesterday’s hike special. Finding something I’ve never seen before is such a thrill. 🌱 #nature #macro #spider

Trump take Bucatini AGAIN

Sorry I can’t go. I have horse rehearsal. I have rehorsal. We rehearse the horses, all kinds. Usually there are a few of us at rehorsal and everyone has different kinds of horse for it. For horse rehearsal. Rehorsal

black forest ham, dark fortress chicken, cursed talisman turkey