Matt Tobey
@mtobey.bsky.social
📤 2626
📥 624
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Past: Comedy Central, The Onion Future: Dead 📍Michigan He/him
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Matt Tobey
onion person
about 11 hours ago
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Matt Tobey
ben driscoll
1 day ago
maybe i am going insane
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I'm only excited about Avatar because now that they've done air, water, and fire, the fourth one will logically be pudding
1 day ago
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A movie that takes place where you’re from
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1 day ago
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Matt Tobey
patrick
2 days ago
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Make America Understand The Words That Are Coming Out Of My Mouth Again
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2 days ago
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Luke O'Neil
8 days ago
[1:1] On the seventh day God rested. [1.2] And for the six days straight before that as well. [1.3] Resting whips ass he said. [1.4] It was all formless and empty and always would be. [1.5] And none of this ever happened to any of us. [1.6] We were all resting too.
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Gil Durán
2 months ago
1/ A longtime Wired editor just wrote a mush-brained essay about how he totally missed the political rot of Silicon Valley (& still doesn't get it). But in the late 1990s, a Wired journalist warned of a toxic ideology bubbling up from tech. Paulina Borsook has largely been erased. Let's change that
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My “TI’s friend never urinated on me” shirt is raising a lot of questions…
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10 days ago
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Matt Tobey
jasper pilled
11 days ago
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Bec Shaw
12 days ago
It soothes my bitter heart to know that no matter how much money Elon Musk has, he will never, ever be funny
t.co/QhuKU9HCxA
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Better Things Are Possible
11 months ago
(living in a country where the most successful people are obscenely rich and shameless perverts and psychopaths) Time to teach my children to be honest and study hard in school
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Gary Alexander
13 days ago
The elite press understands solidarity, just not with any of you.
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lauren
13 days ago
in retrospect the metoo movement did not go too far and in fact should have been given spanish inquisition levels of power and authority
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Mike Schuster
13 days ago
Tonight! Come see Diane and I wing it as we're also operating the projector, the sound board, and lighting system that we're totally unfamiliar with!
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Tim Onion
13 days ago
Michael Wolff, Steve Bannon and Jeffrey Epstein taking time out of their day covering up the world's most famous pedophile ring to complain about Ta-Nehesi Coates.
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Andrew Lawrence
13 days ago
just a reminder this guy slashed the tires on his much younger female coworkers tires to trick her into getting in his car he was married at the time
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rob
13 days ago
jd vance post: erm mom can you pick me up? liberals are trusting the word of *checks notes* jeffrey epstein?? trump post: "THE CORRECT TERM FOR THE PRESIDENT IS EPHEBOPHILE NOT PEDOPHILE" - THE GREAT MARK LEVIN ON FOX NEWS
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Ed Burmila
13 days ago
The crisis of elite impunity that is ruining our society cannot be more clearly or convincingly demonstrated than with the fact that all of these people wrote all this stuff into an email and hit Send.
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David_j_roth
8 months ago
One of the defining feelings in American life, for decades now, is elites doing plainly criminal shit and nothing at all happening as a result. It is deranging in a way that virtually nothing else is. Media fixates on perceived street lawlessness but shit like this matters much more in my opinion.
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Hello Boils and Ghouls
15 days ago
Joyce Carol Oates please post about how Musk has never known the joy of tackling a Grizzly Bear Cub
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leon
15 days ago
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“Vote” them “out”
16 days ago
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NURMEBERG
18 days ago
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Matt Tobey
Bearhat
21 days ago
2026 Primary Woke Wave
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lauren
21 days ago
if you can't savor the villains losing you've lost the spark of beauty and ingenuity that makes life worth living
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Turkullen
26 days ago
play this song as the nyc mayoral results come in
youtu.be/t3jKtjgRZQY?...
loading . . .
conner4real - "F**k Off" (Popstar Deleted Scene/Song)
YouTube video by thelonelyisland
https://youtu.be/t3jKtjgRZQY?si=5BVjZb58nsN7uxIb
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Ben Rosen
21 days ago
cuomo should have thrown in the towel a long time ago, like after pinkerton
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David_j_roth
21 days ago
I knew that Mamdani had it; he had the people and did the work, and has been the clearest and most lucid in rejecting the untenable current state of things. But the vile, bigoted shit against him was so constant, and I am conditioned to that working better than I want. This feels like an exorcism.
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Brendel
over 2 years ago
Eric Adams is amazing because when he won every media person was leaping over each to go “this is the normal sane leadership that the political left doesn’t understand normal sane Americans crave” and then every day since that Eric Adams has been like “Leprechauns are real and I’m going to cook one”
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ahh yeah here he comes, big dersh, alan dershowitz himself, looks like he brought a bag lunch, smart
21 days ago
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Dick Cheney either should have died decades ago or lived one more day
21 days ago
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ceej
5 months ago
you can't draw a lot of conclusions from a single race. there are external factors, flawed candidates, the right political climate. but one conclusion you can absolutely draw is that all of the people who tell you that there's only one way things can be are fucking wrong
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Luke O'Neil
24 days ago
I was fighting fascism with the power of love and kindness and just really getting my ass handed to me.
proteanmag.com/2025/11/01/w...
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Alex Blechman
24 days ago
After the AI bubble I hope the next bubble is Laser Tag. Laser tag arenas on every street corner. Blacklight lit battlefields propping up every sector of the economy. A one story building by the side of the highway called “Blast Zone: Pizza & Arcade” valued at $2.7 trillion
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Just found out my family's marketplace insurance is increasing $400/month. Can't believe I'm going to have to suck 800 more dicks a month
23 days ago
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David_j_roth
about 1 month ago
I wrote about the degrading choices our political system forces on us, the importance of respecting yourself, and the time I experienced a mild Oliver Stone moment at Sammy's Deluxe in Rockland, Maine.
defector.com/what-job-is-...
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What Job Is A Guy With A Nazi Tattoo Qualified For? | Defector
The man that my wife and I found ourselves talking to at the bar of a restaurant in Rockland, Me. in the summer of 2019 had arrived in town as your fancier visitors do, which is by boat. He told us th...
https://defector.com/what-job-is-a-guy-with-a-nazi-tattoo-qualified-for
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Matt Tobey
Standplaats KrakĂłw could really use some cash!
4 months ago
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Matt Tobey
David_j_roth
about 1 month ago
You have to be willing to walk away from these guys if they let you down, just as a matter of basic self respect. It's not a fandom. You're hiring them to do a job or not.
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And to think I used to walk around embarrassed because I *almost* got a Reservoir Dogs tattoo when I was 18
about 1 month ago
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timothy faust
about 1 month ago
I liked the Platner ads too but I think there's a difference between "guy who had some bad reddit posts a decade ago" and "ex-Blackwater merc who still has a Nazi tattoo." Sucks bigtime that he's the only one taking positions and talking policy I like, but them's the breaks!
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Detective
@frankypelvis.bsky.social
and I just blew this case wide open
about 1 month ago
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about 1 month ago
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Matt Tobey
"fart"
about 1 month ago
ffsdfff
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Matt Tobey
tinybaby
about 1 month ago
people playing music/videos on their phone speakers in public is more than just mildly annoying and is instead a leading indicator of the decline of community and empath
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reposted by
Matt Tobey
Mar
about 1 month ago
This woman is in a nursing program & the entire textbook for her anatomy class is wrong because it was written by a professor who used chatgpt to generate the images & possibly the text. She complained to the prof, then the university— they’ve done NOTHING about it.
www.tiktok.com/t/ZTM5T3CxW/
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PROFESSORS RESPONSE @lia #anatomy #ai #fyp #chatgpt #anatomyandphysiology
TikTok video by lia
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTM5T3CxW/
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No kings except this guy
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about 1 month ago
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It appeared to be AI but wasn’t. I know because the pentagon sourced the diarrhea from my shit factory and still hasn’t paid me
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about 1 month ago
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Matt Tobey
Jacob Davison
about 1 month ago
At 2:17 am last night, Rob Schneider went out his front door, ran into the dark, and he never came back...
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