i've been giving my friend so much shit for thinking Israel killed Charlie Kirk. please for the love of god do not make me have to apologize to him

do you think nudists are constantly having nightmares about accidentally wearing pants

show's saturday! tickets are movin! WHAT IS THIS: a comedy show featuring Josh Gondelman, Demi Adejuyigbe, Natalie Walker, Ike Ufomadu, Dina Hashem, Tim Platt, and Eli Yudin WHEN IS IT: saturday @ 9:30 PM WHERE IS IT: Caveat AND on livestream / vod WHO ARE YOU: phil caveat.nyc/events/chron...

so honored to get to give my official Letterboxd Top 4!!

decided to upload this to youtube: a 5 minute discussion (from our patreon) of how The Rizzler is the closest thing we have to royalty in the United States. it is very important to watch youtu.be/IhZuaqlxbH8

added a really cool guest to the live show I'm doing next Saturday in NYC! Phil and I wrote a fantasy pilot script and we've got all these great people reading it live on stage. I think it's gonna be super fun and if you live in the area you should come caveat.nyc/events/chron...

demi is going to crush this role and i am so pumped

🚨 IMPORTANT SATIRE 🚨 PLEASE USE THIS AS A REPLY TO "OWN" PEOPLE WHO ARE WRONG ONLINE

decided to upload this to youtube: a 5 minute discussion (from our patreon) of how The Rizzler is the closest thing we have to royalty in the United States. it is very important to watch youtu.be/IhZuaqlxbH8

RFK Jr's "personal life" section of Wikipedia is the craziest evil shit i've ever read holy shit lol

Algorithm I need you to show me more China infrastructure porn between the America stuff so I don’t kill myself

added a really cool guest to the live show I'm doing next Saturday in NYC! Phil and I wrote a fantasy pilot script and we've got all these great people reading it live on stage. I think it's gonna be super fun and if you live in the area you should come caveat.nyc/events/chron...

You can only live & travel within one region of the United States for the rest of your life. What are you picking?

new Wednesday album 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

since there's a new Paul Thomas Anderson movie coming out and a new Tim Robinson tv show coming out, i feel compelled to post what i believe to be a *perfect* take:

it's very funny to me that Jimmy Fallon did everything "right" with regards to respecting Trump and Trump is still like "fuck that guy i think he sucks i hope he dies" all the time

if Conan was still on the air, i like to think he'd have gotten fired for a sketch where Charlie Kirk is killed by Ginger the Dog

come on this is too far

This "apology" article we ran after this is still maybe my proudest career crowning achievement, and I am only prouder of it reading this lol hard-drive.net/hd/technolog...

it is nice for my old boss at Hard Drive to put in writing that he loves Elon Musk and was uninvolved in us wrecking him on twitter lol

listening to a podcast at .5x speed so i can really savor it

look i get that it's hard to get work as a screenwriter these days but you don't have to do this

DINA HASHEM is playing BARBEARIAN. Dina is one of the sharpest stand-up comedians in NYC. we really wanted this character played by a deadpan killer and I don't think we could have done better. really excited to see her bring this character to life! DINAREAD for 15% caveat.nyc/events/chron...

just got fired from my job for not posting about Robert Redford's death

Andrew Tate wrote a letter from prison that is mostly a high school level analysis of the movie The Shawshank Redemption. it is really funny

there's never a scene in a movie where a supervillain is petting a cat on his lap during an important monologue but the cat gets randomly pissed off and starts biting the fuck out of his hand

Andrew Tate wrote a letter from prison that is mostly a high school level analysis of the movie The Shawshank Redemption. it is really funny

thinking about getting into stocks

happy 3rd birthday to Quorators, which i feel pretty confidently is the best Quora-based podcast in at least the northeast United States. truly truly thank you to everyone who has listened. if you would like to support our show in these trying times, hit us up on patreon patreon.com/quorators

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could get 1000 patrons for our 3rd birthday? 🥰 Say happy birthday Quorators 🎂 patreon.com/quorators

finally got to see my favorite band live, Double Band

it is very funny that the only actual verifiable fact we have about this shooter is that he was a Gamer

How we can de-radicalize young men #standup

the fact that Kirk was killed by a potential superfan of a rival far-right activist really proves his point about the dangers of gang violence

Trump had Charlie Kirk killed to distract from how good the Turnstile Tiny Desk Concert was

well now that we know Charlie Kirk was killed a by a far right groyper, at least we can take solace in the fact that President Trump has vowed to destroy all groups responsible for his friend's death

two more weeks to get a ticket to this cool comedy show in nyc. look i animated the poster. isn't that cool? please sound off below to say "that's cool" if you think it's cool caveat.nyc/events/chron...

yea yea i'm listening, honey, you said tim robinson shot charlie kirk

yes sure i'm jewish but what are you circling back to though

i am reporting live from the line to get into the trueanon live show. experts are saying it's the largest gathering ever of 30-something year old mustaches

the bullet had "pro Kevin Spacey statements" engraved into it, referencing his infamous 2008 film "21" according to sources

The president’s latest public appearance has drawn concern over his health due to his body rapidly flashing red. paletteswap.site/different-co...

so this guy like 100% had a stroke right

people are QUITE UPSET that Clare ate a big carrot in our last episode of Quorators even though it was very funny DECIDE FOR YOURSELF AT youtu.be/e_Boo1X-GGY

just trying to understand charlie kirk saying gun violence is worth it: neutral me making a joke about that: bad you telling me to kill myself: good?

if it's gonna be the 70s again i hope we at least get cool movies out of it

damn there really is a Charlie Kirk quote for every aspect of this story huh