a thousand monster / dinosaur / megafauna movies since Jurassic Park have tried and failed to replicate its magic, but the thing Jurassic Park understood is that we aren’t just hooked by the Big Toothy Creature, we’re hooked by the moment a crotchety old grump rediscovers his sense of wonder

oh no i've escaped containment

May I propose a new law that elected officials can only miss a certain number of consecutive votes before they are removed from office

When an octogenarian is in obvious poor health and starts leaning on written statements to show proof-of-life — all without an actual timetable to return to Congress — I would say the scrutiny should turn from the politician to their staff

I swear to god, we’re at the point where fucking senators are posting proof of life photos with newspapers placed strategically in the shot. Cooked. Cooked. Coooooooked.

So mitch suddenly shows signs of life the exact same day a different senator unexpectedly dies? They aren't even hiding the necromancy anymore

WELP

can someone check up on this? @musicologyduck.bsky.social, is this a recent sports page of the Post?

And suddenly Mitch McConnell appears. Lmfaooooo

Since Austen is all the rage on Bluesky right now, I'm watching The Other Bennet Sister. It's charming as anything.

Yes. Thank you. This is appropriate: respect for the emotions of those he left behind. No buffing bipartisan credentials through hagiography.

If you absolutely gotta do it because of congressional rituals or whatnot, this is the way. I still think you can stay silent! But at least this isn’t glazing a relentless enemy of democracy and gleeful killer of innocent people worldwide just ‘cause he was a decent jokester in the cafeteria.

I think what bothers me most about AI culture is how badly, how deeply bone-level badly, some people want to own slaves.

i know you’re looking for it. here she is, girls. here she is, world

Lindsey Graham didn't report he had a conversation with Mitch McConnell, but I can report he's probably having one now.

Dear Dem leaders: If you must speak, express your condolences to Lindsey Graham's family. That's it. This isn't hard. They mocked the attack on Paul Pelosi and the murders of Minnesota Dem Melissa Hortman and her husband. They villainized ICE murder victims. Stop acting like these are normal times.

girl WHAT

Amy Klobuchar’s eulogy for Lindsey Graham was 390 words long. This was 390 more words than she has said in support of trans people

The Democratic Party's approval rating is in the toilet, and the main reason is voters see Dem leaders and prominent members acting like things are basically okay instead of fighting like there's an emergency. Slot "my friend Lindsey Graham, so funny, how great to work with him" comments into that.

I think @warren.senate.gov @schiff.senate.gov and their staffs (and probably lots more Dem senators, I just personally didn't see others) need to read this. It's spot on.

“But I want to tell you what he was like to hang out with in private when there were no stakes” is a very common response to the death of a person who had immense power in situations with high stakes.

Who can forget the way he wrapped his suit jacket around his head and and face and squealed, "Oh no," in order to get us all to laugh about the necessity of attacking a girls school in Tehran? Good times. We'll all miss his hilarious blood lust.

Right like just be like “I’m sorry to hear my colleague passed. Thoughts and prayers to his family” don’t do all this 😭

“Even though we disagreed on much, Rest In Peace, Lindsey Graham.”

I’d understand if people like Warren offered private condolences to grahams family, but these public platitudes make it seem like democrats just don’t care about the actual impact this dude had. It makes politics seem like a little game rather than something actively hurting their constituents

I hope she has an incredible day.

fatality www.instagram.com/p/DasR6g-lZB...

My longstanding policy preference has been to torture zero souls, for zero days. My colleague Satan preferred to torture all souls, for eternity. I appreciated his willingness to negotiate, which led to the historic Torture One Million Souls act of 2014 and the Torture A Bunch More Souls act of 2018

Michael Fanone's take on Lindsey Graham is one of the most powerful I've read:

Liz, you might want to take a break from speaking to the character of men named Graham

remember, be careful what you post on a day like this. If you do it right, you can get illegally fired for being disrespectful to Lindsay Graham and then win a massive lawsuit about 10 months from now and retire with 2 million in your pocket

As Steve Schmidt put it, Graham was a “pilot fish”

A GOP senator died. No, not that one. Also a state party will have to replace Graham as its candidate. No, not that one.

Congratulations St. Paul on dumping Carter for someone who just may end up being as shitty as Frey.

Friends: no major paper had an obit ready for Sen Graham, because, why would you? What you’re seeing this morning are fast write-ups to relay the basic news. You’ll see more complete obituaries later today and tomorrow, all of which will mention the thing you’re angry they’re not mentioning.

Lindsey Graham comes to a realization at the end of his 20-minute conversation with Mitch McConnell.

I think it's good to tell children not to celebrate the death of someone no matter how bad they seem. Children shouldn't develop cynicism too early, and they haven't lived enough to develop to understand the nuances between "that person does evil" and "I find that person unpleasant." But I'm 53.

I do wonder if there’s someone who loved him, and who Graham loved, who will have to grieve in silence for the sake of his political “legacy,” and that makes me really sad. I hope that’s not what happens.

Mainstream Respectable opinion is that people joking about a bad person's death represents a culture of cruelty, but really it represents a culture of impunity. It's a coping mechanism for watching someone do evil their whole life and never seeing consequences

To be a historian is to speak ill of the dead and the rest of you should take more history classes and join us.

Steve Schmidt sucks but he had Lindsey Graham dead to rights here and it was brutal

Indeed. We are not forcing upon Graham the memory of him being a villain, a coward, and a malignant presence in the country; that was the legacy he chose again and again. He earned our contempt, as has everyone else on his path.

It’s like when your food is taking a long time to come out so your server brings some free bread to apologize for the wait.