#OwlishMonday “She wants to be flowers, but you make her owls. You must not complain, then, if she goes hunting.” Alan Garner, The Owl Service. youtu.be/bIUtvIfe6L8

Seriously, Disney, there are some people who have left you forever but you really only have to do ONE thing to get most of your public back and that's show everyone you fear your customers more than Trump and reinstall Kimmel. Baby Yoda ain't getting you out of this.

I deleted a joke about patchy beards because someone seemed offended and I didn’t expect it to offend anybody. If you saw it and it made you feel bad, I’m sorry!

it could be worse! we could all be forced to defend bill maher instead

I will never get over that there are people out there who think "Aliens" is better than "Alien." Everything that's happening now? All the shit we're in? It's because of opinions like that.

stephen miller is a white nationalist pervert and i’m not sure why we aren’t saying this louder

Someone was complaining that she ordered mapo tofu and was INCENSED that it came with pork. “Who would do that?” she screamed. “Who would put pork on tofu??!?” It did nothing to calm her when I said, “Chinese people?” Quite the opposite in fact.

Headed down to the VFW to brag that my wife has softer boobies than anybody else's.

If you hear Rockin' Robin, someone near you is trying to jolly a 4 year old into dancing

Sex and the Clitty

Make America Some Definition of Tolerable Again

When my wife’s in a Zoom meeting and I jump in and yell BABA BOOEY, she acts mad and they all pretend to be uncomfortable but I can tell they all think it’s hilarious.

If it had caught on in the 1860s instead of the 1960s, jogging would probably have been called “hemerodromianism” or some shit.

extremely fuck this. four neighbors gone.

I’m sorry that your children will be horrified if they can’t watch the specific thing on the specific tv channel. That sounds very hard for you.

Testing a theory: reskeet if "every ICE agent will be unmasked and tried for their crimes" would get your vote

We, as a culture, have completely failed to reckon with the fact that “Porky’s” and “A Christmas Story” were directed by the same person.

But exaggerating the power and efficacy of the state only demoralizes and confuses you and yours. People made a lot of fun of "dont comply in advance" but panicking over something one of these ghouls says in a press conference or social post IS exactly complying in advance.

I dont care for the American flag one bit, not since some right wingers tried to strangle me with it after 9/11. But I'm willing to put my personal preferences asside so as not to get in the way of the goal of getting normies to identify with my politics more than the fash.

from the author of LORD KALVAN OF OTHERWHEN and LITTLE FUZZY

Anybody who's ever had to work with an Oracle database knows in their bones — in a way nobody on earth does aside from the man himself — that Larry Ellison is a contemptible piece of shit.

Shoulder pads filled with petroleum jelly so I can grease my way through the air ducts to witness the secret, dark rites of HR

I read the classics for timeless wisdom, and to be reconnected with the things my lineage hold dear.

The grand game of "is this Reagan's or clinton's fault" for the stupid shit we gotta deal with

The problem with "We can't change Senate norms because then Republicans can get away with so much when they control the Senate" is that Republicans will just abolish the norms anyway and have more empty seats to fill. www.pbs.org/newshour/pol...

Post a female character you like.

When I get to The Aeneid, the opening is “Gonna holler about switchblades and a motherfucker”

IT'S OFFICIAL: Connecticut, Maine, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York State, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island and New York City have formed the Northeast Public Health Collaborative. The collaborative will issue their own vaccine recommendations and coordinate public health efforts.

CVS in Somerville was able to do a same day appointment for flu and Covid shots yesterday, got it sorted so quick. My fellow massholes, villens, etc, do yrselves and your community a favor and get it done asap.

Whaddayamean why do I have a printer at home? Because I'm not an asshole!

seems like the whole point of having a union would be to strike *in this exact situation*

I am not actually sure these corporations, or institutions writ large, are in fact thinking about the regime or its future. They're making short term deals that benefit them, either because they want to do mergers, or purge their own troublemakers. These people are quarterly thinkers with no vision.

Nothing but love for MY Doctor.

Gay men frequently compliment the clothes I’m wearing, which is cool. Maybe they’re just flirting with me, but that’s cool too just in a different way.

Most of our political history is ballot boxes getting stuffed, patronage jobs, and people getting beaten up or killed. Things are better. The fact that our politics are more ideological now creates its own tensions. But we don't really have a choice but to get a grip and live though them.

If I ever see that Liberty Mutual emu in real life I’m going to two hand strangle it and then whip it over my head like a bullroarer.

Out: calling it “flyover country” In: “rectangle states”

What actually happened is that Republicans always wanted to do this, grabbed power, and then just used whatever rhetorical justification was handy to do whatever the fuck, and would have done so regardless of whatever hand wringing happened left of center about hate speech

Working on a modern translation of The Iliad. What do you guys think of “And yeah. Achilles went fuckin ripshit. Just fuckin…balls out horny for doing that gremlin shit, you know?”

Hahaha you were born after the 1970s? Hahahahha gross, dude.

Mainly two things: * Fear. Fascists sow a lot of it. It's their first weapon before anything else and they get far, far weaker if it starts to crumble. * Compliance, at this point especially from liberals and centrists. They're getting a lot of this from other gentry and establishment media...

To review: * The fash are weak on admin from gutting the state bureaucracy. * The fash are weak in otg numbers. Controlling even one part of any major city is a real challenge, especially with any resistance. * The fash are weak on legitimacy. They are increasingly, widely hated. So what's left?

Social Studies teachers don't write or decide laws. Maybe start your education tour of what is or isn't a King with Martha Ann Alito at your next Scrabble night.

Donald Trump doesn't need to deploy the National Guard to stoke fear in Massachusetts. It's already happening with ICE. This is your regular reminder that LUCE is a great community resource. If you suspect an ICE sighting, please call so they can spread the word: 617-370-5023

I would say about 100-200 people showed up but I’m bad at estimating crowds. Blanca’s hearing went very quickly, and she won an additional year of residency. Her lawyer credited the people who showed up for the relative ease of that.

🚨URGENT: Beloved leader Blanca AGAIN ordered to report to ICE. Mark your calendars to join us September 16th. 🔗bit.ly/BlancaUpdates

"this is our CHANCE to have a George Floyd"

I have a new theory that being dismissive of Steely Dan is antisemitism

#SciArtSeptember Day 15: spawning • My winter night mitosis sampler (2024) contains two meanings of spawning: it's a human reproductive cell, creating our spawn, and the cytoplasm looks a bit like spawning fish. #SciArt #embroidery

it's gonna be real funny when we claw back the whole "luminferous æther simply isn't a thing" thing