🤠😎

The primal urge to walk into the forest fires and take a deep breath

it turns out that not being able to go outside drives me insane

Hello I would like to know how do I spend all my time alone without losing any more friends?

Just the president openly selling insider trading... this will surely fix our wildly inflated/depressed economy

Ooooo she is angry

Some people recharge by being around others. I recharge by not hearing a single human voice for 14 consecutive hours

as you can clearly see here copyrights do stifle creativity

Smoke on the water (Last night and this morning)

if you see me in a wedding dress, pushing a raccoon in a stroller [he is wearing a tuxedo] just wish us well, there’s no need to point and laugh

my poem about crying in a taco bell parking lot at the end of the world has never felt more relevant

Oh good, I just had a mildly awkward interaction that the person won't even remember 3 minutes from now, but I will turn into a core memory to be repeated nightly for years to come

Been out of the country for 10 days. Trying to catch up on US news is 🤢 What did I miss?...

I got a new coloring book, team

You can't get a tub of brownies at home

my brother & his partner are telling me an insane story about this local deity called "st. rat" which is apparently a mosaic relief put up by some queers in seattle. the city kept trying to paint over it, but people would repeatedly just use acetone and remove the paint until the city gave up

Sorry I got interrupted by a McCafe ad while trying to read a news article about white supremacists marching on July 4th

America out here looking for happiness at the bottom of a bottle rocket

Fuck it. If the Pope excommunicates JD Vance then I'll go to confession for the first time in 20 years.

Every friend this man thinks he has is an enemy.

Noodle obsession has progressed to terminal stage

“wow your life must be so interesting!” (crying in my room) ha yeah baeb, look at this selfie and tell me im pretty

Posting so people don't think @alternative-ama.bsky.social murdered/ate me 🤤

nice thai food! would u like a side of bleach

A big peanut butter Reese’s bunny is considered a sandwich right?! I’m pretty sure it is! It’s got peanut butter so it has to be

If I disappear, tell the crows

Noodles... and canoodling

Just heard a coworker say "bear with me, I have several tabs open" and same girl, same.

We gotta get Lake County straightened up.

Me too, Scooter, me too

Oh, none for me thanks. That last bit of crippling surrealist anxiety was just enough. I’m quite full now.

I am the batman

Few people ever find a niche passion that intersects with a niche talent and at an age when they’re unapologetic about both. Before the world says “you should be embarrassed.” He’s gonna end up being a world renowned ornithological researcher or educator.

I like bee butts and I cannot lie

I don't wear sunglasses because i get all my nutrients by staring straight into the sun

what strain of weed makes you forget everything that’s ever happened to you

Without stating your age, post a movie that released when you turned 18

Me: "Is it screenshotted or screenshat?" My dentist: "You can just say you haven't been flossing."

Sunset

Boat

How many rounds of brain fog can you undergo before you have no brain left?

Today's look: NSYNC, or mental ward?

Great seeing James Jones from WKYC security feeding his squirrel friend Charlie outside during his work break in downtown Cleveland. The pair met around COVID and James has been bringing Charlie snacks ever since. Charlie now waits for him every day.

Today’s message 👇🏻