VERY COOL PERSON: It's four-twenty, you know what that means? ME: Hell yeah! [starts shoving blackbirds into a pie]

This article is the reddest of red flags: Platner cosplays. He went from "student protestor of the Iraq war" to "volunteer soldier in the Iraq war" to literal mercenary. Pretty obvious he puts on and takes off political identities like clothing

this is amazing. i’m dumbfounded. fuck rkf jr and all his anti-science crusaders.

i sat in the rabbi’s office, struggling to understand his rapid fire questions “אתה מדבר עברית? יידיש?” “how old are you? 18!? what are you doing here? this is the world’s premier rabbinical seminary, we want serious students, not americans who are here to party” “i’ll have my eye on you” he says

some are saying it’s the whitest slang ever

this, 100%

what does yom hashoah mean to me, a millennial american jew? besides what was formally taught to me in school (shockingly little- yeshivish yeshivas don’t really dwell on it), i didn’t really think about it much. as opposed to my friends who all had grandparents who were survivors, only 1 of my (1/)

hey chat is this good?

they should bring back celebrity deathmatch. the world needs a claymation fight between the pope and trump more than ever

gathering my family on the couch to watch this l

sickos, every one of em

I can despise Benjamin Netanyahu and his governing coalition with just as much verve. And I can do it without rushing to utilize his faith as the main descriptor. The tell is Trump is not marked as an unscrupulous Christian, but a member of the "Epstein" class. Raw anti-Semitism. Fuck this asshole.

Why I don't trust anyone a little too obsessed about falling fertility rates

"If you remove him you get Vance." You're familiar with Donald J Trump's foreign policy where we remove a country's leaders one by one until we get to one we can do business with? No reason impeachment can't work the same way

Come on then, and remove him.

I have a father and mother in law in Iran. I have a sister in law. A niece. She's 14. She likes silly pink headbands and purses and dresses, just like kids her age all over the world. There are 93 million people like her in Iran. People who do all the normal mundane life things as the rest of us.

people think the talmud is like the protocols of the elders of zion but it's 9,000 pages of "if a donkey kicks a lamp and sets a hay bale on fire, who pays for the hay" in every possible combination of owners of the donkey, lamp, and hay bale

Y'all there is a woman and a black man circling the moon and NASA's mission control+ science teams are so diverse and people are nerding out about science and exploration this is all a gigantic middle finger to the stupid and hate and grotesque ghouls running our country

Gotta make these for real

Constitutional lawyer here. I don't think it would violate the Constitution for the VP/Cabinet to invoke the 25th Amendment, but the intended constitutional remedy for this behavior is impeachment & removal. The fact that that remedy is politically impossible is a scandal and a crisis.

The New York Times deleted Trump’s “open the fuckin’ strait” line to make him look less insane Their write-up falsely says his post says only “Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it!!!” and “Praise be to Allah”

I think the opposition party widely expected to make historic gains in the next election(s) has an obligation to explain how they'll stop this and prevent it from happening again or it's reasonable to conclude they don't plan on doing those things, which raises more uncomfortable questions

It's real. How the fuck is it real?

doing a “husband’s run” (early morning grocery run for a missing breakfast item, because i get to wander the store and get whatever else i want) but committing the “husband’s folly” (forgetting the one item i was asked to get, eggs)

Just remembering the letter Pete Hegseth’s mom sent him, calling him an abuser of women and telling him their family is “broken by your behavior and lack of character.”

welcome to passover

you, a naive fool: i do believe there are some things the nytimes won’t both sides the nytimes:

real men don’t need to do war crimes to feel strong

That’s one hell of a cover…..

I showed this graph in class yesterday on how measles cases in the United States plummeted dramatically after the vaccine was licensed in 1963. It’s not subtle and I could not resist observing: “This stunning design in measles cases was not thanks to vitamin A. It was not due to beef tallow.”

it's a weird pattern. very similar to how jews are one of the most democratic-leaning demographics in the country yet jewish republicans are widely platformed as being representative of jewish opinion.

what’s the over/under on how fast he falls asleep?

we just love it when the government starts building concentration camps and making lists of us

Mike Pence got totally owned here: Jewish plaintiffs won a ruling against Indiana's abortion ban, using the law he signed 11 years ago as governor to help evangelicals refuse to cater gay weddings and such. Now similar challenges could win in other red states. We tell the story at @forward.com.

lying about it happening on april fool's day: mean-spirited, hurtful, not funny at all it actually happening on april fool's day: possibly the funniest thing of all time

they are calling it the scotus cuck chair

demented donny trying to do as much damage as possible before he shuffles off this mortal coil

stock markets surge as donald trump announces peace talks with a guy he thinks is from iran but is really latino

SCHLAPP: Who wants to see impeachment hearings? CPAC CROWD: *cheers* SCHLAPP: No. That was the wrong answer.

The thing that bothers me about people outside of Bluesky complaining about people on Bluesky is that we’re exactly as annoying as they’re saying but for completely different reasons

i remember when the first lady used to think “the children are the future” now we get this knock-off first lady who thinks that children are “human capital” no wonder what trump saw in her

Hearing a lot of jealousy today from people who live in countries where their main healthcare professional doesn’t have any raccoon penis bones at all

♫ Ooh, baby, baby, it’s a

brb, going to set up my “professional grade” router store on amazon!

Deploring Israel's actions as a state isn't antisemitic. Attacking Jews and symbols of Jewish culture in supposed retaliation for Israel's actions is however *textbook* antisemitism and these are not complicated thoughts to simultaneously hold in one's head.

i wonder if they’ll still be there by the time i have to fly later in the week lol

- Iran won’t close the Strait because that would be very bad for them - we knew they would close it, I expected oil prices to be worse - the strait will open itself - we don’t use it, allies should open it - OPEN THE STRAIT RIGHT NOW OR WE’LL DESTROY YOUR POWER PLANTS

the opening scene in a modern retelling of macbeth

This would be a war crime. Obviously. Collective punishment.