He had them specs on

Louis Riddick on First Take looking delicious.. I retract all previous follicles-adjacent slander

This, but when they talk about “legacies” constantly. If I hear the word legacy more than a few times, I’m out.

“When we was wolves” 🤣🤣🤣

My ex-fiancé, but it was elephants and lions instead 🥴😂

Lmaooo yes. I was like wtf I have never heard of that. Nigga was acting like doing pushups turned him into Elastigirl

He sneezed and his shoulders and back curved in. Like yuck, sneeze more manly. Ick!

He bit his nails down to the knuckle.. fingers were horrendous. Anytime he would put his hands close to meeee

She had lamprey teeth.

dior sauvage 😭😭

We really meant to be together because there was a time where no one could come over my crib without watching Reed Dollaz freestyles with me. We are soulmates 🫂🥹❤️

God forbid a bitch want to be comfy 🤣

Absolutely atrocious footwear. Get all them flats the fuck outta my face.

Did you propose?!

WARNING: Participation in this activity could cause you grave physical and mental harm with legal and moral implications. Yesterplasma’s actions were performed by trained professionals. Do Not Attempt!!

Received a td jakes book as a birthday gift

A lady once told me she rarely drank water because she hated the taste and didn’t understand how people could enjoy it

My last one. We're in bed, just finished. She gets up and starts doing all the dances from Elephant Man's Pon De River Pon De Bank out of the blue. There was no music on. Just just started getting busy. (this is the rap hands lady)

She wore Birdman Lugz to class one day

I think I shared this before, but was on a date and we stopped into an alternative/witch store and she bought a books of spells. I looked confused and she said “I need something for my ex”! You stay blessed beloved!

Clogged my toilet up and didn’t tell me

I had a former co-worker introduce me to one of her friends and her FIRST question after we did introductions was: "What color is your AMEX card?"

One woman had an obsession with honey mustard. I like honey mustard; I think it’s a fine condiment. But she made it her whole personality. Honey mustard in her purse, honey mustard packets in her glove box, always ordering honey mustard at restaurants with any dish. I –

One time, immediately post-coitus, I said “hell yeah, brother” in a Hulk Hogan voice. He did not like that.

She smoked black n milds

I love how buttcracks are our kryptonite😂

Unearthing ghosts of relationships pasts really makes you appreciate the now and the future 😂

Talked way too much about loyalty and wolves

@tonystillsang.bsky.social 😭😭😭

I’m on THE way!

girl! Another one told me that my casual looks weren't casual enough. Like, oh ok Tim Gunn.

had the same birthday as me. stop dickriding omg lfmdodbdodbd

Once made a man put his clothes back on for calling them "tetas" with a weird accent....why are you holding the word "tetas" like Jim Carrey in "The Mask" while I'm standing here butt-booty naked...?!?!??! Get tf out.

Someone caught the ick from a Super Saiyan Hotep😂

If I can’t do childish things and engage in whimsy with you we have no business conversing (see how I used that in a sentence).

icks are valid, that's basic evolution rooting out partners with less fitness. Like a bird having a feather out of place.

I just want Black Hollywood to keep the same energy they have for the these white award shows for the Black award shows. Fuck the Oscars. Fuck the Golden Globes. Fuck the Critics Choice.

And he used self deprecation in his lyrics and forced activism in his songs. White consumers eat that shit up.

(Im remembering too many things now 😆) He showed up to the first date in a sweatshirt with a cartoon character rapper on it, jeans, and a skully he never took off. We were at a really nice Italian restaurant in DC. Never heard from me again.

Screamed when he hit a pothole. I can’t hit that note so you shouldn’t either. 😂

Wore khaki shorts and white socks on a first date Lied about his height, could barely see over the steering wheel and had jaundice His feet were ashy and he boiled chicken Kept calling me ‘lil one’ but I’m taller and older than him

After telling me she didn’t usually date plus sized girls, she smiled and was missing a front tooth.

that's crazy, everyone knows you can only get limonia from citrus fruits

Mf didn’t have a clue who she was.. asked me “who is she and why has she been on tv all week”… WHILE WATCHING HER FUNERAL 🤮

this automatically excludes like 75% of the Cowboys fanbase.

John Cena and Stone Cold rolling over!

The YouTube scholar who didn't believe in reading because "we don't know who wrote those books, we can see who's on Youtube."

Immediately put a finger up and said, “GARÇON!”