Made daughters lunch for work tmrw. Laid my clothes out on the radiator for the morning. In the bath and ready early night because #backtowork

Happy New Year, friends in the Sky. Hope this year is a fulfilling one for us all. Big love xx

RTing myself again because this took three days to prepare.

What’s everyone doing tonight?

For the last 2 hours I’ve either been in the car waiting for my daughter with my son or in the car with my daughter waiting for my son. When either of them is waiting for the other they’re slagging them off for being too long it’s been 2 hours of shite #parentingisrewarding

Bought some more cheese today 🤷🏼‍♀️

Great thread

I offer this one to the crowd... Can anyone have a guess at this irish place name written on the UK 1871 census? Could be a township, a village or a town. Any clues gratefully received :-)

Brigitte Bardot - film star and sex symbol turned massive bloody racist has carked it, I see

This is such a lovely, uplifting read. Loads of people I hadn’t heard of, doing extraordinary things. Fab. The Sunday Times Alternative Honours List of 2025 www.thetimes.com/article/f653...

Eating the first cheese of the season. smoked red fox/Wensleydale/harrogate blue/mozzarella pearls plus gherkins, silver skin onions, piccolino tomatoes and cucumber. LUSH, lads

Wisdom from the old man

“Pray tell, the Baron, what sort of gentleman is he?” “Well…”

I am now in my customary Christmas Eve afternoon bath. This bath signifies that everything is done that needs to be done and if it isn’t done it isn’t getting done because I am done. #done

Well and truly driving home for Christmas, bless him.

One day something will happen — a wedding, a graduation, a job promotion, Jake Paul getting knocked out, Andrew Tate getting knocked out the next day — and you’ll want the right outfit to celebrate. Buy that special outfit now, so you’re ready when that next unexpected moment arrives.

“Be sure to set me to ‘delicate,’ Alison. It’d be a shame to ruin that sweater, you know, in case it ever comes back in style.”

Well I made it to the finish line and have finished for Christmas today. I can’t even say I’m delighted I’m just so KNACKERED. Early night calls #whataraver #alrightgrandma

Unhinged behaviour is usually, by its very nature, shocking and surprising, but when mad shit like this happens every day it gets so fucking BORING. Indescribably, eye-rolling tedious.

Before opening the front door... Put the chain on!

I fancied him like crazy as a kid

doing this to someone should be as difficult and come with as many hoops for the company to jump through and safeguards for the customer as it would be for the bank to lock you out of your house even though you were totally up to date on your mortgage payments. it's that serious.

Had my last invoiceable (is that word?) job today of 2025 although working until Friday as have to finish writing this bloody book. I’ve made myself a spicy margarita to celebrate. Yes I’m aware it Monday. I haven’t made one before and i have to say im a #dabhand

I’m really staggered by how affected I am by Rob Reiner’s death. God it’s so awful

As well as Dick van Dyke, a very happy birthday to the brilliant and marginally younger @mysteriosox.bsky.social

What a milestone. Happy centenary birthday to DVD. No gif of it but The Old Bamboo from Chitty is my absolute favourite. He’s so damn clever in that dance, being just one step behind everybody rise. Fun, brilliant, twinkly, Dick - we salute you.

Large Malbec. Matzos crackers. Body weight in salami and cheese. Pickles (dill and silver skin pickled onions). Bring on Benoit Blanc

Bloody buggering buzzing houseflies in sodding December. What fresh hell is this

Currently on a ban for Sunday roasts in the build up to epic Christmas dinner but can I think of what to cook today? Can I buggery

Huge news. 007 job share.

It's one of Santa's imprisoned Elves who is sick to the back teeth of making toys that kids won't want because 'that one's not trending on TikTok anymore' and wishes he worked at Amazon instead

What's behind door number 6 of HappyToast's advent calendar?

Kate Winslet before and after watching the World Cup draw.

Oh, I guess they don’t shit in the woods after all.

If you look out of your windows tonight you might see her…

@msyellowhat.bsky.social the tree is up with Mourinho bauble of place 😍

Tommy Vance. What a voice #totp

Smoking in videos. Seems madness now #totp

I know people have now decided Peely was a wrong un but he’s 100% one of my greatest heroes and I have a massive photo of him on my wall 🤷🏼‍♀️ #totp

Bury market had a run on cheap frilled skirts that week #totp

They did like a slow walk in perfect time with each didn’t they, those Gibb brothers. What a pain in the arse if you were behind them on the pavement #totp

Crank it up Errol I’m bored shitless here #totp

👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

You’d be bloody gutted if you were chosen for the camel wouldn’t you #totp

[sinking in quicksand] me: oh no wife: we’ll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help me: ok [mambo no. 5 starts to play] me: OH NO

Chef's Kiss bsky.app/profile/miam...

Have made beef ragu with homemade gnocchi. I won’t be making homemade gnocchi again. /end of text

Been buried deep in work until 745 and only just heard about Mani dying 💔