Tell my kids I love them

Hunstanton 🤝 colours load 40 degree wash

The emotional and physical heft of tidying up when you have kids would’ve put me off having them. Currently trying to decide whether to throw away a piece of paper that says “I joost wantid a fig rol”

Off on a kamikaze FenRun

My thesis is now available open access because they wouldn't let me embargo it (oro.open.ac.uk/110434/) Or you can just come to my paper at BCH in September and I'll give you the 15 minute version.

Read a post earlier beginning “if Toy Story was a horror movie…” Toy Story IS a fucking horror movie. The toys are alive. The toys are fucking immortal

I’m reading Lord Jim. Absolute banger

It’s health and safety gone mad

This is razor sharp in a way I've not read from any other writer on the topic. So many lines I could quote. It's absolutely excellent. Go read it.

My friend asked me if I wanted to play football against England tonight, but I ain’t Ghana

Did that thing where you put on a pair of trousers that are too big for you and pretend you’ve lost loads of weight

Monday? More like SUN-day!

When I was young I asked my dad how big metal ships float. “Because they displace more tons of water than they weigh.” No further questions. Makes perfect sense. Thanks Dad

Gubernatorial is a fantastic word. When you are running for the office of gubernor

Happy Father’s Day to my sexiest followers

Seeing pics of the Lido absolutely full of ‘sunrise swimmers’ this morning has warmed my heart

Hey now, hey now, hear what I say now, her penis is just around the corner 🎶

The children have been awake since 4am, continuously clamouring to go to the funfair, “is it time to go to the fair yet”, “Muuuum when are we goiiing”, “funfair in one minute yeah!”, I’m at the end of my tether

The Huntingdon zoo story has made me depressed for about 50 different reasons

5yo’s coming up with pairs of rhyming words. She suggested “bucket” and I immediately shouted “NANTUCKET”

My bf keeps sending me terrible jokes on Whatsapp, misconstruing my polite ‘hahahaha’s as endorsement and then tweeting them out

Forgot to tweet about Bloomsday 🤦‍♀️

That motherfucker should be sponsoring me

hi

Had the honour of reading this a couple of times before it was published. Just stopped to read the whole thing again because it’s so beautiful

I spent an extraordinary couple of hours with Ella Marie Hætta Isaksen, the great Sámi singer and activist. This is her story (of combating racism, preserving language, belting out electro-pop floorfillers, and being regularly hauled off by the police): www.thelineofbestfit.com/features/int...

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Vodka slushie in the Arcade Club. I still can’t do dance mats

Black Mirror (2011)

Bar is doing Grease, but it’s not the Megamix, it’s just the entire soundtrack one song after the other

We are in a well-lit bar

Oh, WHEN the sun don’t shine #totp

Alex is getting chips from The Cod Father and I’m getting chips from rival chippy The Cod Mother and we’re gonna compare them

Once again, the weather has astonished us

Having a highly respectable time

Blackpool karaoke, we’re living now

Vimto-themed train cans

Na na na na na na na na TRAIN CAN

Had words with my 5yo recently about not commenting on people’s bodies. Today she came out with “we can’t comment on people’s bodies, but we can subscribe.”

It’s two weeks since my boy got out of the holiday apartment and went for a lone stroll up Cromer prom. That was a fun day

The word ‘quietly’ is dead to me

Ah I'm delighted to see this series finally announced. I worked on it extensively in the strange hinterland between submission and viva, and there is a great variety of cases! www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

Say it and say it again - Twitter is a toilet, but the main problem lies elsewhere, is in plain sight, and nobody really wants to talk about it.

I appeared as a 'Theme of the Week' expert on the #HarryHillShow and the episode is out now! It is all wonderfully bonkers and there is a lot of ham but I loved chatting to Harry and Alex Horne about the #britishseaside and its heritage. Watch it here www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDnk...

FAO @strongmisgiving.bsky.social

Been hanging out with a baby

Finally watched Blues Brothers. In love with both of them

Went to the cathedral earlier and a large association of knitters had yarn-bombed the whole of World War II

Not to brag or anything, but

Went full Man vs Bee on the bus