Here's the second image taken by the Artemis II crew. The whole world, in a window.

Outline for my next WIP: Foreword Preprologue Prologue Postprologue Preepilogue Epilogue Postepiloque Afterword Coda Post-credits Scene

"i live life how I want but I don't want to bear the costs of doing so" is a classic bit

Lego Under Milk Wood

Lego "one of those places that exist in order to take on children families simply want to get rid of" from The Fifth Child by Doris Lessing.

Lego Crash by J G Ballard.

Lego Malone dying in his bed with exercise book, stick, and pencil

She should buy her own headphones. Be independent. Have some self-respect.

A Lego field with a Lego goat dropping Lego currants while a Lego Bloom and Molly fuck nearby, seen through a Lego window by a second sadder older Lego Bloom on the other side, watching a pair of Lego flies also fuck.

Lego Gravity's Rainbow already available.

that's actually genius because once they get you started they know there are some rubes out there willing to buy a whole Lego Dublin circa 1922

A Lego Man Without Qualities

Lego should do a Ulysses kit with a Lego Leopold and Molly Bloom

it's my birthday, celebrate by buying my book www.stefmo.co.uk/product-page...

this article is infuriating because I'm certain they're talking about earphones and not headphones

I wonder what he was like as a child. Is this her tedious revenge

Yeah, I'm not very clear why the other ones don't turn up after, so my theory - she is actually fencing them at her local Cash Converters.

I know family is family but it is a bit of a cheek to conflate "order online for me because I don't like the internet" with "and also pay for them every time." The reason for her losing them being "house is massive" makes me think they're maybe aristocracy and this is a crazy rich people problem

I would like to know more about this house where things "move about over time" - perhaps there's a poltergeist? Or maybe it's something more mundane, like the house is slowly sliding into the sea (in which case, lost headphones are probably the least of her worries)?

scraping the barrel here. there'd better be a murder next week to make up for this

I DON’T SEE HOW ANYONE COULD DEFEND HENRY HERE. MAGGIE GAVE HIM LIFE, FOOD, CARE. AND ALL SHE ASKS IN RETURN IS ABOUT £425 WORTH OF HEADPHONES ACROSS A NINE-YEAR PERIOD. HENRY, LIKE EVERYONE, WANTS TO BELIEVE THAT LOVE HAS NO PRICE. BUT IT’S TIME TO PAY YOUR DUES BITCH, IT’S MAGGIE TIME

Spare the headphones, spoil the mum. Here's my two top tricks for helping his aging parent: 1. My mum did a 'silver surfer' course a few years ago and is internet savvy. She can even tell AI. 2. Get a snoozeband. They are headphones in a headband. My mum has one and she never loses it.

Elephant in the biscuit tin. She's deteriorating cognitively, and neither of them are acknowledging it, at least not openly. Her "I knew they were there all the time" is an incongruous defence to having lost them. Unless: this is a bit and she's a comic genius.

This is the thing that makes me immediately on his side - there's literally no evidence that he's not simply spending shitloads of money on headphones because his mum is a pain in the arse who can't keep track of her things

"Mum I've bought you three pairs of headphones already this year, if you can't find them I think we need to go for a dementia assessment, or at least consider moving to a more manageable house, maybe a nice bungalow on a retirement estate"

Unless it's haunted she does not live in a house where things "move about".

Henry will just feel bad about writing to the Guardian about his mum when she’s gone, and he’s sorting through her things finding scattered headphones. Dude just needs to keep buying them, and shut up

I haven't read this at all yet but one thought... maybe throw away the old headphone cases?

Dump him, girl www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle...

Tonight's viewing should we not get too sleepy

Alcohol and zero percent alcohol both suggest the possibility of a negative percentage alcohol drink that can take you to dizzying levels of sobriety

Making a cocktail to start my 4 day weekend (tropical diluting juice mixed with orange and mango diluting juice)

No one being brave enough to post one of their own tweets in that Best Tweets thread

Could the surface be... more balls? A different colour if necessary. Balls all the way down

I think clay and grass (if very fine), like tennis, and then rubber. Sandpaper and concrete would be too unpleasant. Leather. PVC? Mercury I'd watch. Maybe something ultrafast, perhaps like airhockey?

Definitely think concrete snooker tables in parks & train stations would be good.

There are surely options for Bond movies here? A perilous version of snooker including minefields, balls as grenades, pockets triggering nuclear explosions, Bond being drunk or drugged, playing against the villain, Robert Jenrick with a pet rat, to save the world.

Book spine serendipity / Poetry on display here

Burlap. Bones. Greased baking paper.

Denim, and one of the pockets has an extra little pocket

Like Tennis, Snooker should take part on a variety of surfaces. You've got the traditional baize, but then perhaps: velvet, sandpaper, concrete, grass, plenty of good options here

People of Edinburgh, book Stefan or harrangue me into putting something on so we get him up here for this!!

Next one! Another Spark

Christopher Nolan exasperatedly demanding that Matthew McConaughey emote more under a giant space helmet while Hans Zimmer deploys an ear-shattering bass drone: yes, it's Refill The Sea of Tranquility, a 4hr Euripides-cribbing arse-numbing tale about the haunted moon being a harsh mistress

Some personal news: Artemis II is thrilled to announce a new acquisition in a three way auction by NASA, the sparkling debut MOON, publishing early 2027.

ARTEMIS II REVOLUTIONISES OUR PERCEPTION OF BODIES AND SPACE WITH ‘GOOP ON YA GRINCH’

Artemis II is an urgent new voice

Artemis II is a space mission but it is also a meditation on loss, longing, and desire, where family secrets, bubbling beneath the surface, will finally be revealed as the crew learn that they are more than just colleagues. That there are some missions you never return from.

The Purpose of a System is What it Does