Tomorrows plans have fallen though and just described them as having “gone up the swanny” which has created much mirth and confusion with the Italians how have no idea what I mean and I suspect that’s the case with Brits born after 1979.

What a ball ach

Just seen a Twitter screen grab of someone referring to Andrew Tate's 'desert trek' into Dubai as 'Lawrence of dry labia'

Just found out that Neil Sedaka’s “Love Will Keep Us Together’ and Joy Division’s ‘Love Will Tear Us Apart’ were recorded in the same room in the same studio.

🎂 Celebrate the fiftieth birthday of the beloved cloth cat Bagpuss, and share Sandra Kerr’s vivid memories of the 1960s folk revival in this classic episode from 2024. 🎧 Listen here: pod.fo/e/39467e

Just started reading this, random charity shop find. Anyone else read it? #booksky

Having to have a dry night which is unfortunate as I made a stunning pasta dish and it needed a glass (bottle) of wine.

‘Please help, we’re influencers’

The only correct location for the controls of an overhead shower is far enough away that you can turn it on without being sprayed with freezing cold water. This is not difficult to understand.

Capitalism might have worked if there'd been consequences, if organisations had been shut down and their shareholders put in prison because they poisoned villages or dodged taxes or faked emissions tests. Good companies could have thrived

This came up in my memories when I needed a beer but also needed my passion for Carry On Films indulged at the same time.

Totally failed to take any photos yesterday, possibly just as well as I drank far to many cocktails so had a suprise when I checked my phone this morning and these were on there. Not sure how we don’t look drunk considering I’ve very little recollection of proceedings. Apparently the food was nice.

While everyone was busy talking about world war three, it occurred to me; should I be focussing on world war me?

Various plans collapsed today so ended up staying in all day which naturally involved doom scrolling. Now I’m more exhausted than if I had actually done something. Is it too late to salvage the day?

This was what came into my head

You see, war isn't *all* bad

Don’t Stop Me now was used in a BBC snooker compilation of Ronnie O’Sullivan potting shots and it worked so well.

I’ve given myself a break from feeling guilty that I should be reading by having a night in listening to great music and drinking Bourbon. God this is realaxing. In need to do it more often. How do I stop feeling guilty ?

No cheating your last saved picture of a celebrity is your therapist.

Frank Carter looks like he’s been paralysed in an Amazon warehouse accident in Reading and won a ‘make a wish’ to have a day with the Sex Pistols here.

'Soldier Rescues Puppy, outskirts of Geilenkirchen, Germany - ca November 1944' Soldier cited as British Trooper W. Williamson, photographer unidentified. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operati...

Sad to hear the great French minimalist synth & drone composer Éliane Radigue has died at 94. She only started making music at 35 after she had started a family. What a magnificent artist.

Fond memories of working at NTL, woman rang up screaming at me. Her husband in background shouts at her, “don’t talk to them like that. They’re on fuck all” Then he takes phone off her, and gives me a line which I have used myself since “Do you have a manager you dislike intensely I can speak to?”

Ringing a call centre with the sole intention of ruining the day of the employee who answers? Prize cunt. No exceptions. You've got a complaint. You're angry. The staff member on minimum wage is trying to help you. Don't be a bullying cunt.

"John Prescott would be loving this"

Forgot I ordered this album Mod Jazz on eBay. Turned up today. There is soooo much Hammond Organ on it. I love it.

Five authors by whom I’ve read at least five books: Colin Wilson Iris Murdoch Ian McEwan Haruki Murakami Daphne Du Maurier

So cold and tired I’m going to bed before 8pm with a bottle of whisky & my ghost book. Sometimes being an adult means you can go to bed early as well as late. Bring it on.

I’m subscribed to so many podcasts it’s costing me a fortune so been cancelling a few subscriptions. However I want to sign up to @theresthistory.bsky.social - is anyone else a member? Seems unclear how to join & what you get.

In a Wetherspoons with a suspended TV showing “Songs of Praise” on mute to the clientele. Which is me, chavs, pensioners, alcoholics & at least 2 murderers. It’s impossible not to watch a silent tv. Feel like I’m in some type of surreal, performance art experience. Am I in the Turner Prize?

Been rewatching the Detectorists for the first time since I saw it. Just wonderful, I wish I had a male friendship like that.

A rare free Friday night in so just put this album on and opened a bottle of wine. It’s bliss but sounds very contemporary.

Sharing from a friend, a passage from the Leveson Inquiry regarding the British actor Denholm Elliott, who died of AIDS in 1992. Three years after her death, the News of the World journalist Paul McMullan did the following to his daughter—neither a celebrity nor even someone of public interest.

Adore this

Justin Webb: ‘shouldn’t it be made as cheap as possible for businesses to employ young people?’ (pay them less that £10 p.h.) Businessman: ‘yes’ 20 minutes later…. ‘Mental illness crisis in the UK, especially amongst young people’ #R4Today

Tonight I’m going to be drinking Night Nurse and I’m more excited about this than any of the stouts I had at Stout Fest. I will not submit to another cold!

Why have lots of fake Gaza accounts followed me asking for money? I famously don’t have any money. I just had to pay a £1300 bill this morning which is a lot of money considering I don’t have it. Thank god for public libraries. Come to me books…

Trying very hard not to order a lot for jazz and funk records. Argh