look I know "it would be funny if I got mega rich off this" sounds like a hustle but you have to admit "John Darnielle now lives in a castle he bought with the proceeds from writing people's Hinge profiles" would be very funny

going door to door letting the elderly honk my butt for charity. it's called Feels on Wheels

I'm sorry furry art lied to you, but a penis under 6" is not "micro", it is an above average penis and is absolutely not a bare minimum for functionality

Happy Solstice, you beautiful and resilient monsters

JD Vance cozying up to the sort of white supremacists who would consider his wife and children insufficiently white (and hence American) is pretty bleak, and says a lot about his character.

"effectively unprecedented"

Upon further consideration, let's all get a little big bigger so we can all be more person per person

I have a former clientboss who needs to read this

Teacher says every time a shitty influencer gets his bell rung, an angel gets its wings.

I first learned about Andrew Tate back in 2017 when he said on Twitter that anyone over 15 watches anime and cartoons are "losers". I never took him seriously from there on.

👍

I have taxes to pay, a crumbling economy, rising rent prices, unaffordable goods and necessities, they stopped funding the healthcare. I really don't have the time to worry about what the genders are doing when I wake up in the morning, nor do I have the energy to explain it to anyone else!

This was McDonald's execs believing a pitch from some AI asshole company that promised they could eliminate annoying ad firms who are always asking you to clarify what you want. 'Finally you can get results by yelling "just make it better" to the computer like you have always dreamed'

I can guarantee you that there is not one ad person at that "studio". I worked in this business. The brass ring is landing a client on retainer like McD with endless cash because they can make all your crazy ideas come true. Humans could've done this faster and cheaper and better.

a remake of Rudolph where he comes out with a bright red nose and everyone’s like. hell yeah that looks sick. also he’s gay

my kid doesn’t really understand the central premise of Rudolph because he’s like, why are they so mean about him looking different. the woke indoctrination is working. my children will defeat Christmas once and for all

"I just think drag hurts kids" I say as I spray tan my toddler so she can look her best in this rhinestone ball gown

Yeah they've been doing that for like years now instead of fighting and its cost my community so many people

Impossible to even describe how many versions of this he could do. He could be the patron saint of the entire world. Instead, they'll have to bury him in a secure location because of how many people will try to piss on his grave.

the broad inability to leave a social media platform owned by a white supremacist and prolific manipulator of public perception really is one of the most discouraging data points right now

🎅 SPOOPMAS IS LIVE! 🎅 🔗 www.twitch.tv/attacracc Join us tonight for a night of FREE art giveaways, Holiday art exchange, game key giveaways, and of course... THE MADVENT CALENDAR 2025! Get your Santa hats on, get some hot cocoa and snuggle up for a cozy spooky evening! 👻 #vtuber #stream #art

and just like that, I’ve improved my life

“I trust my immune system. I don’t need a vaccine.” Ok, I trust mine to protect me too. Which is why I trained it extensively on what the virus looks like so it can handle it. Boxers don’t enter the ring without a plan. It’s the punch you don’t see coming that knocks you out.

Inking ✨️

lol pwnt

Bluesky has the juice

The vibe going into 2026 is "woman on the edge"

🎉 Digital circus mini sticker BUNDLE is now on my Etsy! 🎉 8 mini stickers for $10! FREE shipping in the US~ Please favorite the listing, it helps my small shop a LOT! 💜 🔗 www.etsy.com/listing/4426... #etsyshop #TADC #amazingdigitalcircus #stickershop #stickers #digitalcircus #fanart

🎁 RACC PACC WINTER ART EXCHANGE IS OPEN! 🎁 Runs now through Jan 31st! Format is a lot like art fight, but it's not limited to 2D art! All art forms welcome to join! 🚫 NO A.I 🚫 Join on in! ⏩ discord.gg/mcTheR3 Reindeer art by @snerpadash.bsky.social #artfight #artexchange #arttrade

pro-tip:

no but I don’t want wrong answers only. that won’t help

I've been doing this thing where I blend my frijoles with a chunky salsa and the amount of fiber and nutrients hitting my bloodstream every time I want a little snack is unbelievable. You could also be a nutrient-maxxed fiberswole chadithan like me if you wanted to

Question: When the head of the DOJ’s Civil Rights division tweets out a false statement about an individual that results in them being barraged with death threats based on their religion and ethnicity, which governmental agency would look into whether that student’s Civil Rights had been infringed?

Currently at the funeral for the penny, happening at the Lincoln Memorial:

🚨BREAKING: The Department of Justice (DOJ) appears to have pulled a photo containing images of President Donald Trump from the thousands of files related to convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein it released Friday. www.democracydocket.com/news-alerts/...

Vote Horse 2026, my face is not a black square and I have never been photographed hugging Epstein

in this moment of universal pleasure over the shellacking of Jake Paul I’m finally agreeing to run for office. My platform: 1. return boxing to network tv & basic cable 2. promote lower weight divisions. return to the glory Pipino Cuevas & Danny Lopez days 3. public money for boxing journalism

Evergreen

I drag Rowling in front of the Mirror of Erised. "See, unfortunately for you, this is a normal mirror to me. But I know the same isn't true for you," I say, knowing full well though we both stand in front of the same mirror we both only see one man.

I consider this misattribution one of the funniest things I have ever seen, and the darkest

so Twizzlers somehow absorbed Nibs, which were a qualitatively different red licorice candy, that's fine this stuff happens, I like both, but if you are a fellow candy fiend be advised that the seasonal Twizzlers trees, in the shape of a Christmas tree, are Nibs flavor not Twizzler

is the weekend. aaaaa

Art and the artist for 2025 :)

Free chicken nuggets

LOL he’s muted in my feed for posting AI-generated crap.

They put me on the scammer/vermin list too & also block me. I’ve never interacted with them nor do I have an impersonator. My only crime, as far as I can tell, is I offer marketing & author assistant services, which they do as well. So basically I feel like they’re badmouthing the “competition” 😔

do you know you can just go on Nextdoor and talk to anyone who posts while you're on the phone with the DMV of a state you haven't lived in FOUR FUCKING YEARS