“Les Miserables” the musical is a terrible adaptation of a masterpiece novel which misunderstands the entire point of the book

Happy Appomattox Day to all that celebrate

(Trying to come up with a relatable analogy) You know how your wife be wanting to kill herself?

Once the AI bubble pops and Dubai is safe to flee to again I can finally check off the next item on my life plan, a Music Man-esque scheme where I hustle venture capitalists by pitching something I never fully explain called "Sex 2"

Just a reminder that every Republican is a gutless worm and a Quisling pusillanimous traitor to the Republic.

This is explicitly genocidal

My legal advice to every Republican apparatchik is to Google “Hostis Humani Generis”

Charlie Browns mom: Waaah wah wah wah waaah waaah waaah wah Charlie Brown: oh, you mean pigpen Charlie browns mom: Wah way. Waaaah wahwahwah wah wah waaah waaaah wahwhawah wah wah Charlie Brown: yeah I get that. It’s pretty bad over there but I don’t think they hit him

It’s very funny that Pam Bondi isn’t going to get a pardon now. lol, lmao one could even say

I caught Bidoof on the Pokemon pinball machine yesterday. It was the greatest day of my life. My wife asked: “what about our wedding.” I dunno dear, have you tried getting on Bidoof’s level?

the Wyoming bit is important and underdiscussed it’s a bit more than 1/20 the population of LA county and cows shouldn’t get to vote

Ending Birthright Citizenship in any way is a breach of the Constitutional pact and should be treated accordingly.

counting or not counting gang violence

My "We don't allow bets on assassinations and murder" ad campaign has people asking a lot of questions already answered by the ad campaign

An important thing to remember for No Kings: We are going to win. They are weak. You only feel the need to constantly project strength when you know you are weak and losing.

one of my favorite holiday books is Hershel and the Hanukkah Goblins, which involves the titular Hershel tricking a bunch of goblins in order to save Hanukkah one he tricks by shamelessly lying about the rules of dreidel, and that is basically what trying to do a transaction with Trump is like

Go fash lose cash bb

I’m at ICE HQ

I hope Trump is inspired* by his visit to Graceland *to die on the toilet

Anna Paulina Luna lied about being Jewish and it turns out her grandpa was a Nazi. www.timesofisrael.com/grandfather-...

The very real problem Trump has is that unlike his first term, the bill for his incompetence will come due with him still in office.

VCU go Rams baby

Good. They should absolutely censure him for this grossly racist rhetoric.

maybe this is religious-minority brain but what i want from politicians is for them to share my values and i don't really care in a more cosmic sense about the mechanism that gets them to those values. it's not gonna be the same as mine and that's fine.

someone just called me the "guy who killed cinemasins" and if that's my legacy then i'll take it

I feel like Jim Bob Duggar being a sleazy real estate investor and patriarch of a family of pedophiles says a whole lot about the Republican Party in miniature.

Fascism thrives on cynicism and incoherence. The point of fascist propaganda isn't simply to make you believe something, but to make it ludicrous to believe anything at all - not least so they can say and do whatever they want without ever being accountable for anything. That's why they love AI

Shout out to every dutch person in my neighborhood for never cleaning up after their dog when they shit on the sidewalk. Somehow this will also end up being blamed on immigrants.

why should I change? he’s the one that sucks.

The step-on-the-rake myth

Joe Kent is neither the worst person you know making a good point nor a broken clock; he’s a notorious antisemite and white supremacist who is blaming Jews to get out of a real job that’s quite difficult right now as we increasingly explode the world and create the conditions for terrorism.

You do not, under any circumstances, have to hand it to Joe Kent

easy bucket

Republican shocked to discover Republican Party full of Republicans

I think if you had one of these out front of your home, you should be stripped of your right to vote, specifically

Just hoping for a little “et tu, Filet O’ Fish?”

Very on-brand for Gingrich to seek out a new, younger canal the moment the current canal starts having health problems

Happy Ides of March, where we celebrate the lawful killing of Julius Caesar for reinstating a functional monarchy in the Roman Republic.

friend, this is Marcus Junius Brutus CAESAR has declared himself DICTATOR FOR LIFE and MUST BE STOPPED can you rush a donation of ten denarii today to show that you STAND WITH THE REPUBLIC?

Possible solution to the Strait of Hormuz?

Weird. “DeBiase” doesn’t sound like a Somalian name.

They are all going to prison for bribery. Or they don't go to prison. That is the choice.

Gap down 2%, green by lunch

Weird. It turns out that the United States being unable to enter into any kind of international agreement because it is completely untrustworthy has consequences. Who knew?

It would be such an honor to be killed by Sensei Phil Collins