me: so what’s your DREAM job? her: 😏 I do not dream of labor 😏 me: her: me: her: me: her: me: i used to want to be a marine biologist!

Few years ago I made a little edit of The Simpsons but it's the horror movie Skinamarink

youre in her DMs i am bricked behind a wall in her cellar, we are NOT the same

In 2016, a bunch of us were told that we were just being dramatic, we didn't need to be upset, there were checks and balances, we didn't need to worry and that things could not possibly get as bad as we imagined because no one would ever let that happen. Anyways,

One day I'm going to figure out how to make Broccoli -> Rock Lee into the most transcendent joke ever.

Imagine being a Greenland shark. Deep under the ice, below any sight of the sun, you float almost motionless above the seabed. You do not know what is happening anywhere else in the world. You do not even know there is anywhere else in the world. This is the seven hundred years of your life.

I just want a picture of a GOT! DANG! HOT! DOG! youtu.be/ZXVhOPiM4mk

It drives me crazy. All that cutesy Drumpf/Cheeto/Orange puns nonsense is infantilizing to the speaker and disrespectful to the real harm he’s causing. Honestly, I also hate all the 45/47 euphemisms too. And using asterisks. Just write Trump. Talk like an adult about an actual problem.

Folks miss this all the time; the art of war is "Baby's First Guide to Generalship." That's *WHY* it's still applicable as a primer; because everything in it is *dirt simple.* The logic behind it hasn't changed in 2,500 years of technological advancement for the same reason basic arithmetic hasn't.

The most probable way you, an American, gets harmed from this illegal war isn't a nuclear bomb but you getting shot by a cop with live ammo while protesting. Or you getting pulled out of your car and thrown face first on the ground for being in traffic *near* a protest. Etc.

thinking about the mandela effect or as i like to call it "being wrong"

It is lost in the chaos of everything today but it is bug fuckin nuts that the VP is IN ANOTHER COUNTRY at a rally specifically to ensure a fellow fascist is reelected as Prime Minister. Like I cannot think of another time a VP POLITICALLY CAMPAIGNED FOR A FOREIGN GOVERNMENT in my lifetime

you should call your senator

if Trump nukes Iran it will be because no one powerful in america has ever been seriously punished for anything

yeah man i'll circle back to you on that agenda item from yesterday's all hands in just a sec. our pedophile king just threatened to destroy a whole civilization

Not exaggerating: What’s the reason for the change? Fish are showing lower levels of toxic chemicals known as PCBs, which is shorthand for polychlorinated biphenyls. Zero context on why the levels used to be high (INDUSTRIAL POLLUTION) and how they were lowered (REGULATIONS LOWERED THEM)

This is like when I tell people the reason they're concerned about mercury in fish is because of coal fired plants and the mercury isn't there naturally and I get all BIG EYED like wtf. YES WE DID THIS WE POISONED OURSELVES

After nearly three years of normalized genocide, its threat is now being used openly.

I didn't make this, but it needs a reposting.

I still haven't filed my taxes and every day they give me reasons not to.

I just realized I can't really clown on Western artists for drawing this kind of hair when I see nothing wrong when it's on Kenshirō.

The U.S. will emerge from this period diminished as a world power, absent the alliances that once made us dominant. That’s good. Because we are not a serious people. A serious people would not have elected him. Or put up with this. Unserious people shouldn’t be trusted. And won’t be.

Antidracula - goes around putting blood back into bodies - extra visible in mirrors - positively thrives in sunlight - barges into your home without being asked - often played on screen by Lee Christopher

[space shuttle] CAPTAIN: prepare for landing ME: roger that CAPTAIN: reverse thrusters ME: sretsurht lol CAPTAIN: lol *we smash full speed into the moon*

How do people still fall for pyramid schemes?! Just dont open the sarcophagus and the mummy cant hypnotize you.

It’s a really special parasocial relationship when there’s someone you’ve followed for years without a follow back. like yessss that’s my friend that doesn’t know me and doesn’t want to

The blueprint for the YouTube apology video

I love the Talmud

It's National Library Day! I thought it'd be fun to draw my favorite 'book enthusiasts' from REAL SCIENCE ADVENTURES: THE NICODEMUS JOB in a modern setting.

The Fantasist For Realis from @possibleworlds.bsky.social

old man: “you’re welcome to stay the night, Traveller. But don’t you lay a hand on my three nubile daughters.” me: “oh, no worries. I’m actually really sleepy.” [morning] [breakfast] [old man and his three nubile daughters glaring at me] me: “thanks for putting me up last night. So long!”

the bbc called trumps post "expletive laden" which is incredibly funny to me. it had one f-bomb

learning the awesome power of shutting the fuck up

transcending the flesh through machinery monday

anyone attending the white house correspondents dinner is a fucking traitor

🤗

how was i supposed to know the part that said " # don't delete this part # this part makes the whole thing work # if you delete this bad things will happen " was important

The only way to end the sexual abuse of children who are detained and incarcerated is to stop detaining and incarcerating children. There are no "reforms" that end sexual abuse inside.

Bluesky is dying. No not because trans people speak to me tersely I mean the code base

I'm very much anti conspiracy theory, but it seems painfully obvious that there is a lot that we are not being told about the war in Iran

it’s true that overall likes are way down on bluesky over the past year. however, if you look closely at the data, that’s mostly an anomaly resulting from the fact that your posts specifically have gotten worse and are dragging the vibe down.

i know enough about LLMs to understand bluesky being down is probably unrelated to their recent statements about vibe coding but the timing is so funny i think they should just take this one on the chin and give it up to the haters

Roger Ebert: