I like MapTap a lot (more than Connections, which I've given up on, too obscurely American) but I wish there was an option to turn the obnoxious additional generic comments off.

I've had the best and most packed weekend I've had in months, maybe years, but as a result next week I need to drink 0 alcohol, spend 0 money, speak to 0 people, and eat 100 vegetables.

GREG DAVIES: seems like a kind of a shit task. Everyone just seems like they're going home normally. ALEX HORNE: well before you say that let's have a look at how Odysseus did. cut to panel of AJAX, MENELAUS, AGAMEMNON, and DIOMEDES who are all staring at ODYSSEUS with his head in his hands

i’m like the very hungry caterpillar but instead of a cocoon it’s a cardigan and instead of a butterfly i’m turning into a gross old woman

A proper 'this is the point, isn't it' day today. I love my friends so, so much.

once a year I have a truly exceptional caesar salad that keeps me hooked on the caesar salad crapshoot

@killjamesbond.bsky.social the author of all ya pain has been found!

I performed an extremely minor fix for a boiler issue this morning and I feel almighty. I can't state enough how absolutely useless I was at this a few years ago.

Please read this and remember. Utterly devastating reporting by @andrewkersley.bsky.social. How many others are in the same, or similar, situations due to a litany of errors and failures to protect them?

oh shit I'm awake and have terrible food and there is a NEW EPISODE OF RIVALS. I AM SAT. FRIZZIE 4 LYF

I love to see Djokovic fail. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Vaxxed?

My favourite time of the year for gigging : two months solid MCing the best of comedy clubs as it showcases Edinburgh previews from some of the finest comics in the land.

A friend has asked me if I want to watch Office Romance (Brett Goldstein+JLo, awooooga) with them when it comes out, or whether I will be watching it ~alone~. They know me so well.

Going 'feel the fear and do it anyway' with a dress I'm going out in tonight. (Short, and shows the full period/indigestion bloat.) Wish me luck/bow down in awe, if you bump into me.

Tremendously excited for this.

Gonna get me that skrungly Columbo Drip for the summer...

That's why

New phone has a spam call indicator, which has been helpful so far but whenever it shows up on my phone I keep thinking I've saved the number of a one night stand that I now regret.

Have finally watched Mr On Blast on SNL and I'm fully converted. DEVOUT. youtu.be/mrW2ld-13iQ?...

Freelancing is hard enough already, and inflation sucks. Defector is raising our base freelance rates by 20 percent. Great time to pitch us. Email me or [email protected]

Every mental health awareness campaign Hey, fellasm remember to check in on your mates. Why not drop them a text? Go for a pint. Have a chat. Oh, cool, will that be enough? ... ... Let's hope so

When I see an AI summary, I avert my eyes like I walked in on my grandmother changing clothes.

Pizza Hut. Chicken Cottage. Shake Shack. We long for fast food in an unstable dwelling.

Morning at the lake! Glorious.

Did a thunderstorm wake anyone else up at silly o'clock this morning, or did I just have a night terror?

The last thing you see before opening ChatGPT

it is time I'm sorry to say for an interval of corrective oppression against beautiful people. only uggos in film and visual media for a while. just enough time for our eyes to readjust. this will be good for the unhappy Hots in fact. look at them. these are not the teeth of content individuals

I'm exhausted with beautiful people. I don't want to see them anymore. you couldn't make Who Framed Roger Rabbit? today. the detective would have been some Hemsworthian flesh sculpture but with brown hair and glasses probably

Am off for an outdoor swim at 7pm. Trying to leave it as long as possible before leaving the house to minimise walking through the air soup.

"we're going in a new direction"

If you listen to Sinnerman by Nina Simone while on the move it makes whatever you’re doing feel like an elaborate heist

Today has been full of things that make me happy.

Bit John Major, these glasses.

@gregjenner.bsky.social @byrobdavies.bsky.social @hiddenbonusnoise.bsky.social @dan.echoesanddust.com The best of British luck to you all today. 🫡

800m in the lake, I am a mighty beast. 🏊‍♀️

I have a new phone so I'm in the interstitial period where everything is taking twice as long to do. Bear with if I owe you a message!

because I know y’all can’t click and read

The Assembly has a lot of lovely moments but I'm increasingly cynical about its marketing. ✋️Autistic person here, I'd have personally asked Rylan about his completely false statements about migrants to the UK receiving 'ipads and 4-star hotels'. But that's probably a bit too 'unfiltered', eh.

YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK

Imagine for a moment what he could do if he were the prime minister, had a legislative majority, and appointed both the Chancellor and the Culture Secretary.

Madonna of Milk Enthroned with Child, by Jean Fouquet, 1452-55 (flipped)

I'm about 45% sure we're going to find out in 10 years time that the whole American obsession with British food thing was a Russian psy-op. ''Now Mikhail, let's post another reel about how bad the food is in Leicester Square, and we'll follow it up with a 'No Diet Coke in England' status''

I have yomped in country lanes, indulged in nostalgia, had a coffee and mutual moan with @eddierobson.bsky.social, got a new phone, and now I'm in my favourite pub in the world. (Sorry, all the Manchester pubs.) Thanks, Lancs ❤️

My beautific and tearful nostalgia in Lancaster is always tempered by the experience of having to catch any bus or train. Same with Cheltenham.

Heading to the beach over the bank holiday weekend? 🏖️ Be aware that sea surface temperatures are still relatively low at the moment Take steps to avoid cold water shock if you go into the sea 🏊