I'm going on tour in 2026! Come and see me doing one of the best reviewed shows from the Ed Fringe (according to the British Comedy Guide). It's called King of Crumbs, and it's a load of old nonsense, really. Book now! Tickets: www.mickperrin.com/tours/alasdair-beckett-king-king-of-crumbs

A week today!

What do you mean Wolfe Tone isn't an electronic synth trio from 2010

Glasgow! I am thrilled to announce that myself and Krystal Evans will be discussing our books Life Lessons From Historical Women and The Hottest Girl at Burn Camp next Thursday as part of the Aye Right festival! Get your tickets now! www.glasgowlife.org.uk/event/1/gicf...

A rather pathetic plea that I don't get paid to make these (No TV company has taken up any of these pitches) so every penny counts in helping me make more silly stuff through these terrible cozzie lives ko-fi.com/eleanormorton

Tickets are now available for Leicester on the 20th Feb! events.comedy-festival.co.uk/events/elean...

Happy #Ghostwatch day to all who celebrate.

Happy Hallowe'en from Robert Burns (1785) www.bbc.co.uk/arts/robertb...

Make sure you check your kid's Trick or Treat chocolate tonight. Last Halloween my son bit into a mini Mars bar and found a John Virgo ‘Gotcha' from Noel's House Party inside

The reason Charles was praying with the Pope is to ask him how best to handle an ongoing nonce sitch

New career path: Telling everyone that I use generative AI for everything (and then just half-assing it with my own brain) so people I don’t respect throw piles of money at me and are cool with the final product being bad.

A reminder that all the links to my live shows, book, podcasts etc are here: linktr.ee/eleanormorton Including for the Leicester Comedy Festival which launches tomorrow (Don't worry I'll spam you about it again then)

Good people of Edinburgh, the Lothians and Fife! Very excited to say tickets are NOW AVAILABLE (and free) for my radio record with @zanyzaz.bsky.social and Sikisa, who is too cool for Bluesky. Would love to see you there! www.bbc.co.uk/showsandtour...

You've just made me realise what the true north-south divide is.

guys, i'm recording a pilot on the 18th november at monkey barrel in edinburgh on the same night that @eleanormorton.bsky.social is recording her pilot (with another producer, but i'm sure it'll still be excellent). tickets are going to be flying off the shelves for this so get in early

A dog in a bobble hat recruits local yoot to help him solve a missing persons case

A green surge is happening! 📈 A new poll has the @scottishgreens.org on track to be the 2nd biggest party in Scotland. People need hope and we are the ones offering it.

Pitching cosy British crime drama in 2025 youtube.com/shorts/Qvli_...

FUCK. OFF. Sick of that family using Scotland as their theme park/hunting grounds/waste dump

LISTEN 🎧: Michael Séance receives a call from a vampire upset at his treatment at the Blood Bank

All these years of complex heist movies about the impossibility of stealing jewels without using special equipment and genius level cunning, and we never thought even considered....what if the museum just had terrible security?

FINALLY joined the Scottish Greens @patrickharvie.bsky.social @ross-greer.bsky.social 💚

Never not a perfect day to repost this

Is this the greatest music video ever? @eleanormorton.bsky.social and I discover what might be the sexiest/spookiest performance of Tim Curry's career in The Worst Witch (1986). linktr.ee/readthat

You're welcome bluesky

OK so apparently it's 'the man in the dark' NOT 'the man and the duck in the picture frame, so mystic and soulful '

It's official she's the anti jkr

Listen to me relentlessly bullying @eleanormorton.bsky.social in this month's episode of Eleanor & Alasdair Read That. We're doing Jill Murphy's The Worst Witch (1974). And we're not doing Harry Potter, the Keir Starmer of fantasy literature. linktr.ee/readthat

So excited that Eleanor & Alasdair Read That have done The Worst Witch, I adored those books. @eleanormorton.bsky.social starting the episode singing the 1998 Worst Witch TV theme unlocked something in my brain and I joined in word perfectly like some kind of sleeper agent suddenly activated.

This is exactly it! The average uk viewer only sees the smiley telly version of some of these people

So glad the people of Saudi Arabia got to see the very best of British comedy writing

Arrgh so excited to dive into @lilithepunk.bsky.social 's beautiful new book on household lore!

Throwback to one of my fave Halloween videos www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjhX...

Edinburgh 11th Dec - @eleanormorton.bsky.social, @jonnydonahoe.bsky.social, Amy Matthews and Phil O'Shea!

Remains of the Day is the new Roman Empire

Today I've listened to 2 podcasts where the male co-host (whose name begins with A) has recommended/talked about Remains of the Day to his female co-host (whose name begins with E). Weird coincidence. @aptshadow.bsky.social @emmanewman.bsky.social @misterabk.bsky.social @eleanormorton.bsky.social

Zack absolutely coming for them

Now to watch my 40th reaction video to Taylor Swifts new album which is apparently the best and worst thing that's happened ever

I have a boring question for Scottish green supporters. If I join Scottish Greens, as opposed to Greens OG, will that contribute to the overall green gains? Or not? I would like to join SG because I'm pro indy and its local but I also want to (Alan Partridge voice) *help*

well, I'll have to look at it. we're looking at eating many famous babies, you know, a lot of people tell me they want me to eat that little baby, I say "wait a minute" but a lot of very smart people are telling me you have to eat the baby. so we're eating the baby. and I think we'll do very well.

“What baby? Huh? The Lindbergh baby? You know, I haven’t even thought about it, but many people are saying I should.”

Big strong men come up to me with tears in their eyes saying thank you sir thank your for eating the baby

people say to me all the time mr president mr president please, will you eat this lindbergh baby, and i say no you're not al- well i'm allowed i could eat the baby maybe later i'll eat the baby but- baby, what an interesting word, baby, you never hear about babies anymore, unless you're eating them

So cool that whenever someone asks the president, “did you eat the Lindbergh baby” he’s like, “no but I’d be allowed to, I have the right to, I might do it later”

Our hilarious Funny Friday is back to start your weekend off *right*. 4 great new acts saying the unsayable. £18 advance £20 on the door

That she's cool as fuck?

Dorian Gray does NOT have a picture in his attic youtube.com/shorts/lWNc2...

Sound on for The Railway Children (1970). It looks like a folk horror film, so I added scary noises to the trailer. Listen to me and @eleanormorton.bsky.social for more: linktr.ee/readthat

Wait! That was last year - here's this year! abercomedyfest.co.uk/show/2025/es...