At the date comic

🎵 i'm with mister mountain king, mountain king, mountain king / i'm with mister mountain king in his big stupid hall 🎵

A great year for Dara First #MockTheWeek returns to TV now winning #eurovision

I think it's going to be Isreal 2nd and UK last place until the end of time.

Just heard UK are dead last again. Fuck yeah! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

Zzzzzzzzzz

Just a wee reminder that 'Father Ted: A Song for Europe' is available to watch online, and it's free, and Graham Linehan is mad about people choosing it as an anti-genocidal alternative tonight. www.channel4.com/programmes/f...

Thomas the Tank, Louis Theroux, Mr Blobby? This week's #SNLUK is definitely trying to alienate the American viewers on Peacock!

I do miss Eurovision. I'm not going to belittle those who get immense joy out of it. I also saw everyone take a break from recapping for about ~7 minutes and I think I've figured out the reason. Thank you for that.

I don’t watch it so the ghost of Wogan can’t steal my soul like a normal person

Can't believe you're boycotting Eurovision because you all think Scott Mills "didn't do anything wrong". [HI BLUESKY THIS IS A JOKE]

BBC4 are missing a trick here. They should air a Eurovision from the 70s at the same time as the current one. The #TOTP posters here would lose their shit.

BBC4 are missing a trick here. They should air a Eurovision from the 70s at the same time as the current one. The #TOTP posters here would lose their shit.

me watching Independence Day (1996) and getting it confused with Mars Attacks! (1996)

This is my surgery on Thursday explained in 30 seconds. My eye is essentially going to be a water balloon.

I've been told Leicester Comedy Festival will pay me before 7pm Sunday. What will come first: payment or another apology email?

Trump hearing "cisgender" and thinking its "six genders" then getting all mad about it, thus forcing other Republicans to agree that the libs are now demanding there be six genders, is a perfect encapsulation of our Golden Age of Dickishness and Stupidity.

You know that bit in Animal Farm where they cant tell the difference between the pigs and the farmers anymore

Pugh Pugh Barney McGrew Cuthbert Dibble Grubb

Currently in a hospital waiting room and the TV is showing Cunts Might Buy A Hot House or whatever the fuck this is

Said the ladies talked With creaks and cracks Soon turned out It was Ira Glass

The new RAYE album was quickly becoming a jyperfixation. Since Saturday, I have refrained from listening to it. But, my brain HAS been playing it on a loop so that's nice.

I'm hoping to get this done today as I don't want another weekend of hindrance getting in the way. ❤️

For my next stage of PIP, I had to have a medical review with a doctor who then types up a letter to pass on to the medical secretary. This costs £25 cash - another fucking hurdle during my appeal. It is money I simply do not have. If you are able to, any help is appreciated. paypal.me/frizfrizzle

NYT PUZZLE EDITOR: remember guys we have people playing our games from around the world, so make sure your questions aren't too Americancentric ok? WORDLE: sure STRANDS: of course SPELLING BEE: ok CONNECTIONS: [wearing a stars and stripes tuxedo & Uncle Sam hat, firing gun into the air] YEEEHAWW

For my next stage of PIP, I had to have a medical review with a doctor who then types up a letter to pass on to the medical secretary. This costs £25 cash - another fucking hurdle during my appeal. It is money I simply do not have. If you are able to, any help is appreciated. paypal.me/frizfrizzle

Someone just used the "you must be fun at parties" retort about me hating AI flyers. I am! It's how I meet other creative people who can design their own fucking flyers!

State of Online Stand Up Comedy rant: Why is it that the same people who think that 'online comedy doesn't work' are the same ones that sell stand up courses taught over Zoom?

Wes Retreating

Very funny to recieve a Popbitcj newsletter at 12.39pm which says "no sign of a Streeting resignation yet" only for him to resign literally one minute later.

Here is my lukewarm take of the month. Where Is My Husband? is a great song. RAYE's new album is fantastic. But Husband? just doesn't belong on the album. Should have just been its own single.

Looks fine to me

The Muppets Animal Farm

Had a pre-op phone call before next week's eye surgery and it was just forty minutes of someone reading out the medical dictionary and me saying "no".

Do you want to see an actual page from the kids book "The Mr Blobby Joke Book"? Of course you do.

MAN: Hello, police? It's a terrible thing, you see, my wife was killed last night, I was hoping you could send someone to investigate OFFICER: Certainly sir, the great detective Columbo is in town. Go and see him, he will solve the case MAN: Ah, I see, very good. Oh, officer, just one more thing,

Quick question what the fuck is that

I do worry about Linehan's brain. He is outraged RTE are boycotting the Eurovision (because of Israel), but he himself will be boycotting Eurovision (because of the trans). He must be constantly angry and one day his head will explode after accidentally reading two pronouns in a row.

We call this design 'Kicking Random Man Up The Arse.' €5 from every sale goes directly to the World Food Programme's Palestine appeal >>> https://waterfordwhispers.shop/products/arse-kicked

Fuck me I hate this so much. The IBIS hotels have a sign outside their lift along the lines of "TAKE OUR STAIR CHALLENGE" which I wanted to kick every fucking time.

I have to say, they really do go well with the second floor.

There is a cryptic crossword solving scene in a TV show that includes an indirect anagram indicator and I am pissed off.

Application Forms for Edinburgh Fringe WHAT'S IN THE BOX? 2026 are OPEN! Audience members put things in a box. I make up games. It is chaotic. Form is here: forms.gle/gczT3vwqNfpm...

This is how to do Alt Text

heard a guy say "you have to access it through the portal" and i was momentarily struck by how sad it is that what he said is so boring :( "accessing it via the portal" should be wonderful. we deserve that at least. it should be cool to access it via the portal and instead it sucks shit

"So, Danny Zucko, what makes you think you'll be a good accountant?" "I've got skills. They're multiplying."

"Stop this horseplay!" - director of Equus