middling novelists looking to give their books some unearned heft by setting them in Auschwitz need to get a move on, they're running out of job titles

I finally cleaned up my messy cablework

@jameshunt.bsky.social SEE it wasn't just islanders! the BHS escalator has cross-cultural appeal!!

let's just circle back to setting up a discourse on these exciting innovations in the bullshit space

Here’s a quick sketch as a thank-you for embedding that verse in my head ALL BLOODY DAY…

told alexa to play distressing music. she played de-stressing music instead. coward

The song goes on to claim that bees "fall in love," for which i see NO evidence, given that he's a drain on the hive's resources and would be pushed outside to die at the first sign of winter.

Find your eponym by taking your first name and putting your last name after it

*have a banana noise* Guadalajara

One day I hope to be ubiquitous. That's me all over.

Fun screening coming up in London! Love to continue our cheerleading of all things Cartoon Saloon a double bill of their brand new short film, plus the feature that started it all.

this is beautiful and a metaphor

HARDEST PHOTO OF 2025 JUST DROPPED

Might fuck around and start phoning my friends without warning

oh shit cultural monopoly by giant companies isn't the territory to be won but a monster that squats on it????

delighted to announce my new book series, "the ordinary middle aged people with disposable income who turn out to be cleverer than everyone else, including the police, when it comes to crime, despite what you might have heard from their ungrateful offspring". i think there'll be a big market for it.

Dear @bootsmcgoot.bsky.social, I realised this week that this notion has taken up its terrible residence in my head, possibly for life. Thank you for your service.

the panic scream in me bows to the panicked scream in you, namaste

1. Just so we’re clear, this is the clip that got Jimmy Kimmel’s show shelved by ABC. If I’m missing any other clips please let me know.

In a world... Where diacritics... Are strictly forbidden... One man... Is about to discover... That you can't make an umlaut... Without breaking regs...

You cannot kill me in a way that matters.

As always,

The word in energy circles is that the UK passed a significant milestone yesterday: for one hour, Britain's entire domestic electricity demand was met entirely by clean sources.

changed my mind i'm a patriot now

one of these days i'm going to magically become a better, more exciting person. today i am slightly sleepy though

one day, i will no longer greet every spooky noise by thinking "oh god it's rats again"

Today, the UN officially designated Israel’s assault on Gaza as a genocide. As a party to the Genocide Convention, the U.S. has a legal obligation to obey our own laws, stop weapons sales to Israel, and demand a permanent ceasefire. End the genocide. Ceasefire now.

my parents have killed their landline! it's the only phone number i know! nobody arrest me until I've memorised a new one ok thanks

if a conker falls on your head, are you the conkee?

yknow how if you crack an egg into a bowl and throw the shell away, you still have an egg? this conker has three conkers in

In Dutch I have on more than one occasion wished someone "kind vegetables"

anyone investing in zuck's ideas should be put through the NFL concussion protocol

I feel bad for Zagreus. Can't walk outside for more than a few minutes at a time due to his cthonic illness

@jonnysims.bsky.social have been following Penumbra's Entities-themed outfits with fascination. They've just put out footage from their catwalk! More here: www.tiktok.com/@penumbra_de...

scurrying about the hillside at 4am fixing the kerning on the hollywood sign

live your life in such a way that it won’t be considered an insult to your memory to post unedited direct quotes of things you said in public repeatedly

I think about this poem by Ian Duhig — about Jo Cox, the Labour MP assassinated by a man shouting ‘Britain first’ — every day at the moment. No other contemporary poet has looked so clearly at the political reality of the far right as a minority who must always be appeased

i'm sorry what

keep hearing people abbreviate kilograms as KGs, i guess that makes sense? but we already have kilos for that. but maybe that could mean kilometres? but i feel like it's clear from context. in summary, ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

I feel bad for Zagreus. Can't walk outside for more than a few minutes at a time due to his cthonic illness

KIM KITSURAGI - "What is it, detective? Can you make it out?" BULLET - "if you read this you are gay lmao" 1. "It, um, doesn't say anything." 2. "Transgender ideology. My old foe." 3. [Espirit de Corps - Medium 10] "I think you should read it for yourself, Kim."

sack it off, pack it in let's not begin

Game idea: mario clone, except as soon as you jump on a goomba you are put on trial for murder

i think people are fond of yaks because they're so like a bull

sorry but why do i have to move the mouse to make this loading bar go up

"Update your wardrobe for the new season!" wait there's a NEW season? because if it's autumn again I'm all set. I got jumpers from last time

If you can't handle me at my worst (eating a microwaved lasagne wearing just my pants) you don't deserve me at my best (same but with a hat on)

doubt it convinces anyone but i like the pro-solar framing that it's better at converting energy than corn. fuck corn, we're kicking corn's ass now

but free speech u guys

Just saw an article where a 20yo was quoted as saying “feminism has really hurt the nuclear family” and I want them to yell at them that FEMINISM PREDATES THE NUCLEAR FAMILY. THE NUCLEAR FAMILY WAS INVENTED IN THE 1950S TO SELL YOU HOUSES AND CARS.