Good morning I bring good news

i hope bsky realizes there is no more certain way of ensuring I will never follow someone back than adding a giant blue FOLLOW BACK button to my notifications

The liberal media wants you to hate Hawaiian pizza! Once you realize how pineapple ties the whole dish together it’s over for them!

I’m gonna be posting thanksgiving fails for the next two weeks. Then I’ll probably start posting food crimes after that. I’ll have to see what else is under the hashtag

This is the second worst post involving rainbows I’ve seen today. Out of two. It really is one of those days

You should be able to find jobs by searching "guy who shows up on time and generally does what he's supposed to"

every science news article is like "chinese researchers invent cure for hurting your back getting out of bed" and every science policy news article is like "uncomfortable bed lobby successfully lobbies trump admin with $500 bribe"

"did you even read the article???? the headline is bad but the article is good!!!" buddy if I see a restaurant called Dan's Fecal Stew i am not gonna go in there to see if maybe they printed the sign wrong

the internet used to be comminism since all the information on webbed sites used to be free but now the internet is capitalism because its worse and costs money

I never understood why they can’t use taxpayer funds for, whatever it is they’re doing with these donations.

I did this speed test in a car wash

I'm crying in the club THANK YOU HOLY SHIT

It’s giving Streisand effect

might be time for ramen

god damn the liberal takes today are making me remember why I shit on No Kings so much

Better yet, he should get this tweet tattooed on his back

"You are wrong if you think the Communists are enamored of violence. They would be very pleased to drop violent methods if the ruling class agreed to give way to the working class. But the experience of history speaks against such an assumption." - Joseph Stalin interview with H.G. Wells, 1934

Guys, it’s okay, I found it in the popular with friends feed

What if we didn’t drop bombs, while also being gay?

When someone uses the last of the toilet paper and doesn't replace the roll

“Society is falling apart because of what rich people are doing to us. And I’m going to torment brown people about it.” Is the entire thought process of fascism

Trying not to laugh at this

People erroneously assume communists have some innate desire for revolution and bloodshed, but the reality is most just understand it to be historically necessary and thus believe we should organize and learn in accordance with that knowledge.

[whenever i read about the end of ww2]: should have shot a lot more fascists

I hate checking in on UK politics. What do you mean none of the parties are the lesser evil?

*internal monologue* They’re making me tell everyone what I did on the pedophile island that I chose to go to. I have to threaten them again.

I will make a burrito large enough to end capitalism, this is my promise and vow

This is gonna be one of those days isn’t it

"Instead of the Epstein files, the Dems should be pushing [other thing]!" Look, if your enemy is shit scared of a single infantryman named Stinky Bob, you put Stinky Bob in the vanguard. Stack all your fancy cavalry and grenadiers you wanted to behind him, but lead with your most effective unit.

It does look like beef had a three way

it makes a lot of sense that my employer and i pay anthem over $30k a year for my family's shitty health insurance instead of me paying a 10% payroll tax for a single payer system

Capitalism is a system whereby the poor are systemically exterminated so Elon Musk can build a machine that tells everyone he is a greater athlete than LeBron James large numbers of people think this is the best and only way to organize society

What the fuck?

This is what the president shits into when he's on the road so nobody obtains his poop Look it up

this kind of page is why we can never let wikipedia die en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...

here’s the thing: if you always dreamed about jetting out to the island but weren’t big enough to score an invite, you can just not say anything. no one is ever going to know what was in your head unless you tell them

please start posting as if there’s someone in your life that loves you

Elon is burning down the planet and poisoning Memphis all to create a robot father that will say ‘I love you son’

The national media loves rapists and wants them to win

Don't mention NSFW and don't mention the word commission as well, to be safe. Sharing to help many. Keep going guys and be careful.

I think this prediction is holding up pretty well, and maybe I should have noted the failure of the Turn Charlie Kirk Into A Martyr moment might have been the pinnacle of the phenomenon. In some deep way I think the New Right Loser Men fail to understand what state power can and can't do for them.

Can’t believe the whole country has to suffer through the return of Dickensian childhood diseases because the worst, most ignorant attention-demanders decided other people’s expertise makes them feel bad

Islamoleftism? I wonder where I’ve heard something like that before?

Why is this the first thing that pops up when you click on gifs?

Why didn’t I think of that?