Every day is a constant struggle to not post "I hope you get run over by a roller compactor" under, like, fifteen different peoples' posts

This is metal

The photos of those Haitian refugees was his first big break, as they earned him the Robert Capa Gold Medal award, which catapulted his career. But at the moment he took the images, he and the other men on the boat thought they were going to die. He had this to say about the experience:

[gonzo voice] and the Grink, who was NOT there,

20 years ago tonight, Andy Samberg and Chris Parnell enjoyed a Lazy Sunday:

every conversation with a tech ceo

techbros: we have created AGI cognitive scientists: you fucked up a perfectly good spreadsheet is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety

The computer, which I believe to be a lady, said I was doing a good job do it is good.

You need to read this Roger Ebert review of Looney Tunes: Back in Action. It is never mentioned when people do lists of the best of Roger, but I think it should be, if only for the incredible tangent he goes on. I think the movie is underrated as well. www.rogerebert.com/reviews/loon...

incredible stuff over at r/ididnthaveeggs It’s a eggnog recipe

Editor: You get those photos of the mother who thinks their child owes them love? Photographer: Sure did boss, real fuckin bitchy just like you asked. Editor: what

please dont put in the newspaper that i got mad.

My mommy said I'm the best boy

One of the biggest moments of my career: USCIS canceled my client’s naturalization oath ceremony. We filed a lawsuit, went to trial, and the judge swore him in right there in the courtroom!

Jesus, this is good "Waingros have infiltrated every part of the world through a combination of relentless self-promotion fueled by unearned self-confidence. They walk into any situation that requires teamwork and community, asking, “How could I make this about me?”"

insanely good thing to say when you enter a room

In Gchat the salute emoji winks and I want to go on record that I don’t condone that. My salute emoji is not flirtatious or rascally in any way. They are a good soldier and they exist only to show respect.

when I know I'm never going to have to face any consequences for nearly killing someone in a hazing ritual

Me when it happens

this is what I look like when I'm checking my email on another screen while I'm on a video call for work

Logging into fucking *substack* to write about the guilt by association a video game company has is very very rich

clarissa explains it all, except for how to tell an ad is ai

This entire weekend

The coolest ever

I think about this tweet every day

I am only sharing this because it has one of the meanest burns I have ever heard in my life and I want to just snuggle with it like a warm blanket

I'm not sure I hate anyone as much as this announcer hates Harry Darling #ncfc

That's fucking rich

Another little bit of inspiration I made for you

Good morning!! 🎄🩸

Live theatre is so good. "Mediocrities, everywhere: I absolve you" is such a perfect line

"I'm not in denial, I'm in open rebellion" damn that quote goes hard

Time again for my favorite christmas post ever, one that still makes me laugh every time i read it

Pissbitch

Ken Griffin wandering from city to city post-election like the Flying Dutchman

😤

Colleges are in trouble because STEM majors crashed the economy 18 years ago and my cohort didn't have babies because of it.

every time i read about one of these college presidents promising to reinvent the liberal arts education i think of "marge v. the monorail"

I remember being in like 1st grade, standing in line before school, and a friend asked me if I believed in Santa. And I remember saying something along the lines of "I want to believe magic is real" and we both just nodded

How about you just watch the tv show like a normal person?

TIL about a memorial ceremony in Iceland in 2019 to mark the end of a glacier, changing the place name from Okjökull to Ok (jökull = glacier). Uncompromising wording on the bronze plaque: "This is to acknowledge that we know what is happening and what needs to be done. Only you know if we did it".

What makes me angriest about the fake AI videos where people yell at ICE is that there’s a million actual videos, there’s actual priests being pelted with pepper balls, it’s just that the real priest didn’t say “we worship the real God not your ORANGE one” so he wasn’t quippy enough

Thread on how to detect ai in that viral dog video

"Let each of the lost once have been loved. Let it be true that someone once placed a hand, tender, to hold off what was to come..."

Philly history lesson, Meet a local legend.

Hell yes

We got Weird Al out here singing Killing In The Name, the time for moderation is over

Reader, I gasped