THE GRINCH: and to all a good night!!! *five minutes later* CINDY LOO WHO'S MOM: hey can we talk? thanks for bringing back the presents and cutting the roast beast but - did you talk to my kid? THE GRINCH: uh, yes, uh, when I wa- CINDY LOO WHO'S MOM: okay so don't ever talk to my kid again

This and the discussion about how academics can now just read AI summaries of things really drives home how much these guys always confuse the product for the goal. You don't do a coloring sheet because you want to have a colored sheet at the end!!! The coloring is the point!!!

Yo La Tengo Hanukkah Season is the only time of year I almost understand what it's like to be a Phish fan.

Im compiling a list of science fiction phrases that spark joy

there's nothing I like about having a cold but feeling completely and malevolent hopped up and insane is the worst part

It's like you take that old twitter thread about a Type of English Guy who's into Dr Who, real ale, Morris dancing, Discworld etc, then flip everything that makes him potentially charming into evil while magnifying everything that makes him potentially annoying

It’s like the cutesy portmanteau side of tumblr (ie “fuckwaffle”) became family annihilators

"You can play better by roll than many who play by hand" you see? "And you can play all pieces while they can play but a few. And now even untrained persons can do it," breaks your heart. (And more, from Agapē Agape, one of the two great novellas of AI, the other being Zweig's Schachnovelle.)

nobody cool has ever explained how their great whatever came over on the mayflower. it is loser shit

the secret of Pynchon is that he’s the “she let me hit cause I’m goofy” of literary fiction

it's irritating because it's bullshit, not because of some need to define it more precisely

would love to come up with a working definition for "TERF style," which is like. what if a thesaurus was sentient, evil, and having a panic attack

Do you guys remember. HQ Trivia. That guy. What incredible lives we've all lived

This was an intrusive thought that kept me from sleeping last night until I typed it out

something that is very funny to me is I got the original Hoban book from the library and I kind of assumed that the Riverbottom Nightmare Band was not in the original book but no it's in there. In the original story the inhabitants of this small town go absolutely nuts for an insane hair metal band

If you like Emmett Otter’s Jug Band Christmas you’ll love Riddley Walker

I keep thinking about this

not an expert but I think in general you're supposed to avoid getting punched right in the face while you stand there with your arms down like a dipshit

If a rat visits your toilet

(Calling home for the first time on night 5 of my business trip) and what of my portcullis? Holding fast, no doubt?

if you worked with someone who kept telling you about how well they were doing on all of the cognitive tests their doctors had them take you would not walk away from that interaction going "everything seems to be going well for Bob"

Winning a seat by comfortable high single digits gets you the exact same one vote in Congress as somebody winning their seat by Assad margins. Chasing after the latter would be completely irrational if your goal is to maximize translating votes into policy wins.

Biden ran a point and a half ahead of House Dems generally. But more relevant: you know what winning a seat by 13 points instead of 8 points gets you? Absolutely nothing. Even if Casten traded away a few points he didn't need anyway in order to go further on whatever issue, that's rational behavior!

Unclear what it means to say someone has "underperformed" when they have actually won elections if all you're talking about is winning elections or not, rather than what they do in office. He won! That's the performance!

nice pivot, but I've already depicted myself as the Mint Magic wizard and his friendly unicorn, your argument is now moot

A few years ago I told a friend that Love, Actually is the modern medieval nativity play and they've never forgiven me for being so correct

a few years ago we were talking about doing a live zoom performance of a medieval nativity play and today I pulled out my copy of "Everyman and Medieval Miracle Plays" and all of the ones dealing with the nativity have long segments of Rodney dangerfield jokes about how hard it is to be matried

hitting the bane button and feeling a sudden rush as theraflu flows into my veins

I like to call him Palmer “Un”Luckey because of how he will feel when Anubis weighs his leaden heart against the feather of Maat at the entrance to Ammit’s gaping maw

would you believe me if i told you this guy has "Technologist, and Evangelist for the global #startup and #tech ecosystem" in his bio?

this is kind of like how Henry Kissinger dated a bunch of actresses and models in the 70s

I'm driving around like "oh I hate this intersection" "oh I hate this block" "oh I hate this turn" no man you just hate driving

lying on the floor to jerk off "twin peaks style"

laudanum addict bear vs shamanic vision koala

nice argument. unfortunately for you i have already portrayed you as the passed out and drooling sleeptime bear and me as the alert, confident and powerful throat cooler koala

Cruelty is anhedonic. It rarely delivers the euphoria promised because, in the abstract, what feels righteous and joyful inevitably reveals itself to be sordid and small. Then it's "No not like that". "No not enough". "No the real battle, the forever war to make this feel good starts now". Forever.

I am so deeply sorry to be in the position to have to pull this lever again, but I just watched my car get towed away and I don't really know what else to do anymore. More details in the update & description, but if you're able to help out or share, we would be grateful beyond words.

the source problem with what feels like the majority of things in America is: there's a nontrivial percentage of people who are obsessively aggrieved with things to the point of mental illness, they have nothing going on in their lives and no community that would moderate their behavior at all

hey man check this out..I bought a special game boy that used to kill people

For anyone who struggles with gender-neutral language while speaking French, this zine will help! Free download: sheerspite.ca/product/se-f... Print version, $0-3: sheerspite.ca/product/se-f...

I say this with zero irony: if you are even tangentially a part of a retro video game community, it is your civic duty to push back against this company and shun anyone who doesn't. This is fascism tapping gently at the door and as soon as you let it in, it's going to invite its friends.

if I had an account at Bank of America I do not think I would any more

I really enjoyed Diane Seuss's new collection Modern Poetry, wish I had room for it in my bag to reread at my parents'. Coming across this poem online is what got me into her, happy to find it in here.

Maybe this is happening and I'm not seeing it but I'm astonished democrats haven't been talking about the like Fuck All That Bullshit Act of 2026

(Guided By Voices - The Goldheart Mountaintop Queen Directory voice) Flintheart Glomgold, Scrooge McDuck’s foe

The “five dollars a month for an extra episode of the podcast” is the last fair deal in America

Hiring managers keep telling me I’m not getting the job because of my huge juicy tits and fat ass

who gives a shit!!! we've got other shit to deal with!!! I'm busy!!!