"We all want to be that NPC thinking about that sandwich we want to have later. But we can't be. And we unite in that. Finger sandwiches keep us separate. The party sub brings us together. It's not just a sandwich, it's a community."

Getting closer

The Money Is Speech For Me And Not For Thee Act

Elon just heard they're making one of the keebler elves biracial and got so mad on his jet he threw one of his toddlers out the emergency exit (Cybertodd)

If the market was real this kind of shit would actually have an effect on your company's stock as investor confidence would be shaken by someone this fucking dumb steering a major company

Nonbinary people owe me $1 each

And also wrote legislation which exacerbated mass incarceration, which lead to mass disfranchisement. Vote!!

Kamala famously was the Vice President for the man who put Clarence Thomas on the bench

The thing I love about this is the reason this is possible is thanks to the Supreme Court. Was it leftists who said they didn't "give a fuck" about the Courts 15 years ago? Or was that Rahm Emmanuel?

Seeing Dril enter his Reply Guy Era is the only reason to ever log into Threads

Joe: I am a 73 year-old retired mechanic in Forsberg, Nebraska. My 3 biggest problems are Iran's uranium enrichment capability, the casting of Helen in Christopher Nolan's "Odyssey," and the ability of Tennesseeans to check out "Roots" from a library 1000 media outlets: can we please talk at length

Does anybody remember years ago during Trump 1, Lou Dobbs signed off his show one night with something to the effect of “Have a good weekend. Thanks to President Trump for making such a thing possible.”

I'm black and from the south. I hate this stupid "oh you're white because I disagree with you" shit people online do. We're not fucking a monolith. Stop taking away my blackness because you're uncomfortable that people don't love the Democrats as much as you do. "Suburban punk" my fucking ass.

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You tell us you don't want our vote, you want Republican votes, and we should fuck off. Then you blame us if we do what you asked. Which of course isn't even your real problem, you just want a convenient scapegoat that allows you to continue thinking you are perfect at politics and never wrong.

The audacity of this post… omfg, lmao “WE”… You fucking ghouls don’t want to give people equal rights and then say privileged “you owe us your vote” fucking Nazi-brained shit like this.

Wonder if the constant need for attention is a consequence of all that neglectful parenting they insist made them tough

This is not a "controversy" or a "dispute" about casting. It's a racist position being echoed and amplified by other racists. Journalists need to learn to use the word "racist" much more freely; right now, too many publications treat it as unprovable unless self-reported.

Ross, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, Monica, Joey

strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, charisma

Once in a while I find myself thinking how to this day Princess Opal was wrong

still not quite over the fact that i watched 15 year olds get sued for millions of dollars for downloading twelve songs and now we all have to accept AI slop because every tech company in the known universe decided that IP laws don't exist now that they're inconvenient for them

It's not just that, it's practically all of online. When we're all invisible to each other, so much just becomes a war of egos because you can't see the person behind it. I mean, Socrates figured this out about wisdom thousands of years ago.

Spurs - Wolves going six games with a point differential of Spurs +97 is wild

Well, that's because a concerning number of Americans don't understand policy or their own political ideology. They understand teams. They don't understand that "pro law and order and pro limited government" are the right's way of saying no taxes, no regulation and the cops are always correct.

Please help Mohammed get his son treatment for his vision loss. His family's gone through the ordeal of nearly losing Elias to Israel's ongoing genocidal famine, & you all helped him survive. He needs your help again:

Whoaaaa you’re telling me that everyone wasn’t excited about the same Nazi drug addict at the same time?! It wasn’t organic?! You’re telling me a parade of unattractive untalented unpleasant Nazis and human trafficker snake oil salesmen aren’t beloved by normal people?!

Who out here having fun in Menlo Park on a Friday night

Awful, sucks, but I looked through the replies to this and I don't think a single one of these cry laughing emoji spam Ray Liotta in GoodFellas GIF posts is by a real person

There is nothing funnier to liberals than gay sex and sexual violence

I think anyone who says they're "just calling balls and strikes" about politics should receive a strike to the balls

what makes this guy believe he's an impartial arbiter of the world? this mfer thinks he's he's calling balls and strikes when no one asked him to be ref

I recently learned Billy West is 74 years old. Did you know that?

"limited government" (except for "law and order" and the wars in the Middle East you spent years fucking your keyboard advocating for) is a big reason we're where we are now, ding-dong

yuck! i'm not pro any of that shit

man i don't want to be a democrat anymore

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Literally just realized this is the origin of Trump's "six genders" thing. Somehow even dumber than I thought it would be

Beyond the obvious horseshit of this white man talking about "white male socialization" and pretending he's doing the difficult work of being a neutral arbitrator... As a smart guy, people like this love to pretend these issues are complex so they can feel smart, but they're actually very simple:

It is a heavy burden to stand outside of other groups of people and judge whether they have done the work to stop thinking like me

Same with "did you just assume my gender?" the only people I've ever heard say that are right-wing bigots

I used to think this, but now I think it's like "just enough Democrats vote for the Dogs Playing Basketball Act for it to pass, then the Democrats ask for $50 to Resist the bill they just voted for"

Why are you bringing Musk screenshots over here? Nobody needs to see that shit and we can’t even mute it because you don’t put his name on it lol

Every time I see someone talk about my opinions on sti testing it gets even more absurd People are now saying I’m demanding every person in a 20 year monogamous relationship get tested every month, 3 months, six months

Also this fucking apartheid dumbass apparently doesn't know Nolan won Best Picture and Best Director for his LAST film

Well I'm glad he could take a break from trying to sleep with high schoolers and executive producing the adaptation of the Israeli show about outrageously oversexed high schoolers for this

This person tried to overturn a democratic result out of cult-driven ideological zealotry. This country is not served by anti-democratic lunatic criminals who stand in opposition to the legitimate will of its citizens.