I ❤️spending 10 hours on a Friday staring at a computer screen

Lmao

Last month in The Onion:

Dear lord

Listen, all I know is I can't afford beef anymore I do not care what the numbers say. I want to be able to afford beef. This is not an unreasonable stance, nor is it an ignorant one.

Assuming everyone gets healthy the way they're supposed to, I'm pretty sure the Jays are going to have a great season and I'm going to hate every fucking second of it.

Important

this is one of my favorite Deaf stories. humans are extraordinary creatures, each of us with gifts no one else possesses. we don't value our differences enough, celebrate our singular strengths enough. the Gaulledett Eleven could handle their shit better than the brawniest man's man astronaut.

“Two can play at that game” is literally the Drebin quote here when he takes an innocent woman hostage to cluelessly fight the enemy

Jen Pawol, the first woman to umpire an MLB game, is working third base tonight at the Orioles game

The leader of Iran apologizes to Pope Leo for President Trump's blasphemy.

jd vance negotiating with Iran

4D chess in which Trump gradually eats all the pieces.

Blocking the Strait of Hormuz to unblock the Strait of Hormuz is peak Trump foreign policy.

Sometimes when I'm settling down from a party I check out songs I like on YouTube and nothing has ever made me feel older than this Jon Stewart/Conan O'Brien/Urge Overkill clip. I guess I'm ancient youtu.be/yjMSTgImEmE?...

First 15000 at tomorrows #BlueJays game get a hospital gown just like the players wear!

Live shot of the 2026 Jays

As usual, I blame shiny jacket guy. #BlueJays

I'm one of those trans women. I worked ground ops for Artemis I. I am torn between celebrating the success of my friends and peers and grieving how my dream of working for NASA was shattered by hateful assholes in Tallahassee

The sign worked!!! Baseball is the best

I can't stop laughing at this post. It's perfect.

I really wish the Sox could’ve hosted the Cardinals for this giveaway.

I love baseball

I'm getting pretty upset by some of the stuff I'm seeing on this site today

Whoopsie poopsie

Recession indicator

brb off to invent pancake shoes

I imagine it takes a LOT of frustration for rank and file soldiers to openly say the Pentagon is lying.

These are spot on.

Davis Schneider will just keep starting rallies until morale improves

When the government agrees not to destroy all human life for no reason for at least two weeks

Thumbs up to Sparkle Jacket Guy for wearing a Toronto Sceptres shirt

After Trump's latest genocidal utterances, I'm posting this again from Anaïs Nin’s diary from 1939-1944: “America is in even greater danger because of its cult of toughness, its hatred of sensitivity, and someday it may have to pay a price for this, because atrophy of feeling creates criminals”.

Come on then, and remove him.

God, I love her so much. Just banger after bager. She's in it purely for the love of the game and I respect that.

Starting to relate to the musicians who kept on playing as the Titanic sank.

Look inside Iran pre-Epic Fury. It may as well be Williamsburg. These are the people they want you to fear

losing contact with the earth for 40 minutes sounds nice

okay now Artemis II is out of range of Earth we can say what we actually think of them

Absolutely incredible Nutella ad.

If you want to observe an actual factual textbook DSM narcissism, that old fool held a press conference at the same time a major feat of human exploration occurred.

If you can't You don't deserve handle me at my me at my

Two glasses of white wine make me feel like I might die the next day, in case you're wondering what it's like to be over the age of 50

all right, well, you can stop wondering if he’s dead. just got out of an open mic night at the comedy barn and Donald Trump was the surprise guest

Lotta men getting emotional and angry over at the bad place about this post

I've been in London for a few weeks and I've found that one big difference between the two countries is that the US likes Dire Straits the correct, normal amount and the UK is a little overboard.

The 30 Rockification of real life is nearing completion