I mean yeah it’s an authoritarian takeover but can we take some comfort in the fact that the people doing it are INSANELY stupid?

The new @pattonoswalt.bsky.social special BLACK COFFEE AND ICE WATER has a couple terrific bits about AI.

Was a big fan of the monolith from 2001, had no idea it visited Epstein Island. Donating my Blu-Ray to charity.

THIS MONDAY! Patton Oswalt & Friends (moved from last Sunday — sorry!) Me! Jackie Kashian! Bob Odenkirk! Sarah Silverman! Tickets are almost gone. See you there?!?

I wrote this under embargo and remember being shocked when the other reviews came in. It felt like @pattonoswalt.bsky.social was the only other person fully behind this absolute kickass time at the movies. Punisher War Zone & @lexialex.bsky.social forever. www.sfchronicle.com/movies/artic...

I’m at the combination Pizza Hut and Kennedy Center.

A humbling tribute.

“Oh you mean THIS gate key.” “I’m just as God made me, sir.” “I had some more fried food for lunch.” Even the throwaway lines by day players in Rob Reiner movies landed. He delighted in everything.

I interviewed Rob Reiner as one of the bonuses for the @criterion.bsky.social BluRay of SPINAL TAP. We talked for an hour about the movie and his career and then they shut off the cameras and we talked about movies for another hour. A delightful, unhurried genius.

If you still get a chance to see this in theaters TAKE it because watching an audience react to the insane twists and turns is almost as fun as the movie itself. Saw it opening day and the crowd was INTO IT

*screams* www.instagram.com/reel/DRd2ldW...

Tickets are NOW ON SALE for Cali 2026!!! Get 'em while they're sizzling. PattonOswalt.com

Damn, that’s… exactly what I bet I looked like tonight

“Did you like that necklace I got you? You don’t remember? I gave it to you last week. You said you loved it. You really forgot that quickly?”

i gotta hand it to the "let's ban african immigrants from voting" lobby, they got the one spokesman who could convince me.

Got this year’s Christmas Ghost Stories from the sweeties at @biblioasis.bsky.social!!! With groovy covers by SETH! Can’t wait to crack ‘em!

You will be visited by 3 spirits.

FIFA just gave me an EGOT. #humbled #grateful

Just thinking about how fucked up mega-rich people must be, because they can't even enjoy their money properly, because the most enjoyable thing to do with money is to use it to fix people's problems.

YES YES YES!!! The hilarious and wonderful Charlene deGuzman is crowdfunding her new pilot FAM BAM! She’s a true original and I can’t WAIT to see this thing! I kicked in some $$$ — can you? If so, thanks! seedandspark.com/fund/fambam#...

🐂🐄🐂🐄🐴🐴🐴🐴

If you’ve watched the first few episodes of THE ABANDONS, you know the answer to this one

There are no old whippersnappers.

Hey, can my deleted BlueSky post get re-posted?

I've been remiss in gushing over seeing CHAIN REACTIONS in a cinema last week, and the compelling insights provided by its interview subjects, esp @pattonoswalt.bsky.social & @horrornonna.com. It's one of the best doccos I've seen this year. Get yr Blu here: selects.darkskyfilms.com/products/cha...

With the traditional hanging of the Quint ornament, the Oswalt Family Christmas Season has begun.

❤️❤️❤️

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

“Part. Of. A. Team.”

The new @pattonoswalt.bsky.social album is a god damn delight to listen to. I cackled as I was reorganizing my china and porcelain knicknacks. Because apparently I am now an 85 year old grand dame. I needed those laughs this morning.

There will be vinyl soon. Stay tuned!

Amazing as usual 5/5

I signed up for audible because I saw @pattonoswalt.bsky.social in Jimny Kimmel the other day last week, and I heard him talking about his new hour as an original. It takes me back to when I discovered him, with his first 3 albums. I miss listening to comedy albums like i used to. 😢

A massive shout out to @pattonoswalt.bsky.social, @davekarger.bsky.social, @msemilyedwards.bsky.social, @aduralde.bsky.social, @imtiffanyyu.bsky.social, @bjcolangelo.bsky.social, and @jtarnold.bsky.social. You guys don't know how much your support means to me.

well i guess i’m gonna have to start smoking now

If I’m understanding this correctly, X is owned by a white nationalist who pays poor people of color in developing countries to pretend to be working class white Americans to scare other white Americans into being afraid poor people of color from developing countries are going to ruin America?

BLACK COFFEE AND ICE WATER is available for download NOW on Audible! A fresh hour of brand-new comedy. One of the loosest, rawest albums I’ve ever done and I am beyond proud of it!

BLACK COFFEE AND ICE WATER is available for download NOW on Audible! A fresh hour of brand-new comedy. One of the loosest, rawest albums I’ve ever done and I am beyond proud of it!

Anyone posted this one yet?

big bugs bunny getting elmer fudd to marry him vibes in the white house currently i see

1157 days.

Saw this window on a walk in NYC last night and it haunts me. The occupant clearly wants a lot of plants inside for the oxygen and other health benefits and that’s cool but look at the way they press against those windows. They want OUT OUT OUT.

PATTON OSWALT: These people are scared. They're being targeted. We're watching them be targeted right now. We're watching transgender people be targeted in a very aggressive way, so— BILL MAHER: We are? Where? OSWALT: Oh my god. MAHER: Where are they being targeted?

One day left! An extraordinary offering from a truly committed art book publisher BEEHIVE BOOKS! Matchless artists, and top of the line production values! GULLIVER'S TRAVELS with the legendary Lorenzo Mattotti!!! Introduction by @pattonoswalt.bsky.social ! www.kickstarter.com/projects/bee...

I really hate it when scientists keep saying that “we need to rebuild trust in science,” because it implies that scientists are to blame for the mistrust rather than the millions of dollars of dark money that have funded political attacks on science in order to advance a far right agenda.

Minor Threats: The Last Devil Left Alive #2 is AVAILABLE TODAY at your local comic shop! Written by @pattonoswalt.bsky.social & @blumjordan.bsky.social and illustrated by Scott Hepburn! Make sure to grab that @jgonzo.bsky.social variant cover! 💀

The new run of MINOR THREATS goes HARD and crazy. Give it a read! New issue out today!

Third appearance from @pattonoswalt.bsky.social just might be the best yet! open.spotify.com/episode/7qlf...

THIS SUNDAY!!! 3 comedians make their Largo debut! Plus me me me wrestling with the world! How can you miss this? Grab tickets now!