Mario is canon friend zoned by Princess Peach which means he picks her up from Bowsers crib after being cummed in.

Cornel West

Happy New Year People!

““Your body isn’t an ornament designed for other people’s pleasure. It belongs to you alone. You’re magnificent just as you are. Whether you lose weight or gain more, you’ll still be magnificent. Have a cake if you want one.”” — Lisa Kleypas

Happy birthday to me! 🎁 Go donate to shereadyfoundation.org/

It can get difficult to keep up with the people you chose to keep up with. Thank you…

Embodying perfection is as simple as perfecting embodying and don’t quote me on that. Thank you…

Two movies just came out today! One was PLENTY! ❤️‍🔥 All jokes. Thank you…

Let’s quit fighting kids and start hugging them instead. Sometimes you gotta be a mirror to reflect on what’s behind you. Did that sound smart? #ingenuous Thank you…

Self improvement over improvement of myself. Let that sink in. Thank you…

You don’t got to get ready if you stay #sheready. Tiffany Haddish merch is officially here ✨ Shop our debut line of caps, sweaters, and t-shirts at the link. 🔗: shop.tiffanyhaddish.com

First tweet!!!!!

Read my new book! It’s about a bronze tiger named Dimper who is disciplined by his own past AND born anew by his travels to save his Aunt from Tiger Hell. “Treachery is a diseased man’s game and a drooling dog’s dinner.” (He just says that every few paragraphs) Thank you…

I’ve been Tiffaning it up in the Haddish? Be descriptive!!! And love your true self. That’s the Tiffany Haddish way. Thank you…

Yo! It’s me Tiffany Haddish. Thank you…