To paraphrase a diminutive pitcher with a chip on his shoulder the size of Ken Rosenthal, “Height doesn’t measure metrics”. Wait a minute…

This is supposed to be Mr Met as the Mandalorian, but it’s giving more Dark Helmet

hashtag nattytude

Stop what you are doing and look at Natty

They did

Delayed. I was at my dad’s!

That's a +.673 WPA on that Daulton Varsho walkoff grand slam.

I have to draft my kids 4 pitch team tomorrow apparently. Should be interesting lol

Beats the Rays for once

I will never, ever understand the Jays playing Enter Sandman (with a light show!) for an opposing reliever, even a bastardized dubstep version

95 down the middle and Springer pops it up :(

Gifting them runs ugh

I'm putting out feelers for non-Blue Jays related activities during their series against the Rays.

I hate the Rays more than Rays hater now

Lauer recognizes he's "not a shoo-in for a rotation spot", wants to give #BlueJays better innings: “I obviously shot myself in the foot with my last start giving up three runs in the first inning, so I didn’t do myself much justice there. Today, I didn’t do a whole lot better."

Rule 5 pick Spencer Miles says it’s still a bit “surreal” to face Mike Trout and strike him out. Asked what role he’d like to play he says he feels capable of starting games if needed but will do whatever the Blue Jays ask of him

He’s a convicted felon who is going to be sentenced to 10 years in federal prison in 2 weeks. Why did they do this

If there’s one person at Rogers Centre who loves Eric Lauer, it’s Jo Adell.

Eric Lauer with an era of 7 and throwing 90 mph, I don't think you can even roster him now.

A guy with 132 MLB home runs is currently batting to a 5.000 OPS in a league that plays its games in a city park with free attendance across from the playground & splashpad. He will likely be extradited within the next month to face trial for a possible 20 years in federal prison. Absolute circus.

I repeat

Lauer sucks

My most hated Blue Jays 2026 edition: 1) Sosa 2) Lauer 3) Heineman

Naturally he does that lol

Immediately walks the first guy he faces lol

“We, the creators of the Torment Nexus, are now suing the writers of the classic science fiction novel ‘Don’t Create the Torment Nexus.’”

Supposed to take my wife out for Mother’s Day. My son gets to watch one TV show and then throws a tantrum about having to go out for lunch. Ffs kid

This is literally every politician ever

Lenyn Sosa can’t even get a hit off a position player lol

Circling back, Valenzuela was hitting .192/.263/.365 when he woke up this morning. Now his line is .246/.306/.474.

😬

JK Rowling is now represented by a trans person in the Scottish parliament. Absolutely incredible.

Pinango going down sucks. It really does. But I understand why they did the move. Also, Sosa sucks. (Maybe they should try to get Pinango 1B reps or something 😬)

Score runs?

This dog was a three term mayor of Whoville.

Update: it was good! $20 good?, no, of course not, but if you're gonna be the guy who just talks about how much stadium food costs these days why don't you just talk about how your generation is fierce but loyal and you drank hose water

Hopping on a plane asap!! #Kazadilla #BlueJays

Losing an electoral riding to own the libs

I love when Tyler Rogers comes in and induces a bunch of weak contact. Oh. Oh no not like that

Hate the trop

Whatever you might think of the Leafs’ weird hiring, under no circumstances, do you gotta hand it to Steve Simmons.

No matter what happens, Raptors played above expectations this year

Raptors playing like shit since end of 2nd year quarter ugh

More from Heineman on being lifted today by Schneider: "That at-bat was pretty trash. I popped up on a pitch I should have drove. I've been pretty crappy the past 10 games or so. He probably saw something he shouldn't have saw or that I did wrong. He made a decision." #BlueJays

Brandon Valenzuela is now in to catch as a defensive sub. After Heineman hit with the bases loaded in the top half of the inning, the only way this makes sense is if Heineman is dealing with something... We'll see. #BlueJays

I think the bad place has essentially become a bunch of Elon simps/bots claiming the left are the real racists while they simultaneously are spewing a bunch of racist shit.Of course with a dash of misogyny, transphobia, homophobia, Islamophobia, and anti-Semitic conspiracy theories for good measure.

Tatyn, Houstyn, Jetsyn, Lennyn

Happy birthday to the legend @slangsonsports.bsky.social! All-time great human being and baseball mind, easily one of the best collaborators I’ve seen at ESPN. Have the best day, Sarah.