Jays All-Star representatives this year: Ernie Clement and Spencer Miles.

One of my favourite baseball red-ass moments is when a guy gets hit and the pitcher says it wasn’t on purpose and the batter yells “Throw it over the plate!”

SWEET BABY JESÚS

Valenzuela’s slides are often quite silly.

Yo, Hendrick

Today I started pondering who Anthony Santander might replace on the roster and then I slapped my stupid face.

IF YOU DON’T SWING AT THE BAD PITCHES GEORGIE THEN THEY HAVE TO THROW YOU A GOOD PITCH JUST LIKE THAT THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.

I don’t think the Jays are winning the team Gold Glove this year.

I’d really like the Blue Jays to go on a week, long offensive explosion, but I suppose I should focus my hopes one game at a time.

I mean, ya gotta do something.

So, without looking…the Jays’ rotation is Gausman, Yesavage, Patrick Corbin…and nine relievers in a trenchcoat?

I can only hope that in the waning days of my professional life, I have as many employers willing to overlook my diminished state, wishing for just enough of my former glory.

Save me Ernie

In my defence, I was right about something at some point.

Piñango is much better in the field than some suggested. (It’s me. I am “some”.)

A hit! A very palpable hit!

Me, when I see an influencer unboxing shit that that the Blue Jays sent them.

I don’t like the red socks and sleeves.

Gargh!

Every series is a trap series. But the Marlins? Of Miami? Florida? That’s the trappiest of trap series right now.

There was some sort of respiratory virus going around over the last couple of months, and it was weeks of lingering misery. When you’re in the middle of it, you wish you were as smart as the folks with masks.

Woke up this morning and my first instinct was “I should be weirder.” The world is a just an endless horrific clown rodeo. Why am I trying so hard to remain dignified?

I might even have paid $7 per month for that.

Taolette is asking for help in writing an essay, and it’s taking all of my strength to not elbow her out of the way and write it for her.

Call up McAdoo.

Hasn’t been the best sports week for your Uncle Tao. Could use a Jays comeback today.

For a split, I feel pretty encouraged by that series.

When Arash did the second set of finger quotes on his Berríos conspiracy theory reel, I was out.

It’s the Russians’ fault I picked Dylan Crews over Paul Skenes in my rookie draft a few seasons ago.

I want what they have (a hot dog)

Far prefer a dude with a neck hickey tattoo.

I don't know what it says about the state of women's hockey, but the fans at last night's Charge game spent a lot of time cursing at them for not shooting the puck. (Which I, an enlightened and handsome fan, know they didn't do because the Victoire did a great job getting into shooting lanes.)

It was my first time in a few months to watch the Charge in person, and I really noticed the progression of Rory Guilday. I have an Executive Membership in the Ronja Savolainen Fan Club, but I think the choice between who the Charge prioritizes keeping this summer will be difficult.

Pretty bummed about the end of the Charge season. Tough loss…they didn’t play well. Plus, their roster is going to get plundered again by expansion. Sad to say goodbye to this team.

Jenner and MPP’s hug nearly did me in.

Tough to watch the other team celebrate in your barn.💔

Allez-y les filles! Go Charge⚡️

How nice must it be to be the "independent journalist" who spends days settling scores and going on about the RCAF's Snowbirds, and who said what when about if/when/for how long they would be grounded. Truly, the most dad-coded concerns in the midst of total global chaos.

PWHL Finals game 4 tomorrow and I have tickets, but in the most unfortunate scheduling issue faced by any fan this post season, it conflicts with the season finale of Survivor. Impossible.

Lots of discussions about about the Jays maintaining lineup balance between lefties and righties. Just want to point out that Charles McAdoo is a right-handed hitter.

Jays have some fight. Last year’s team might have scrounged something out of these two games.

I’m not totally sure what my reaction to last night’s Jays game was. I feel like I should be more annoyed. Maybe driving all day and watching the Charge win dulled my reaction. (It would be nice if Yariel pitched well when it mattered. And if George could keep his head down on the ball.)

One of my lingering sports fan heartaches was seeing Scott Parker leave West Ham after they were relegated in 2011. I’m not ready to go through this again.

What up to the counterfeit jersey store that is relentlessly pushing ads to me via social media with the implicit message “Don’t you miss when things were REAL and team names and logos were racist?” Good luck with that, scumbags.

Smuggled these babies back to Upper Canada.

Beauty of a game.

I drove home from NB today. 11 hours door to door. I flipped off six drivers, launched about 40 expletives at others. Also, sang along with the entirety of Tom Waits’ Rain Dogs, and got about 47% of the lyrics correct.

Back to the Jays. Also, hello friends. I missed you.

Charge win!

A win. A fair and respectable win.